Miscarrying today

[Stuckinstressville]

HI all, not sure why am here, just need support i guess. Am all over the place mentally.
I had a scan last Friday where it looked the size measured 5 weeks, yet my dates suggested i was 7+6weeks, had a repeat scan on the 23rd booked.
I went all odd, i was with DC 1 14 months at the EPU at this point, due to left hand side pain which was found to be a corpus lutuem cyst.

Given i had DC with me, i could not react, so went on with life, unemotional, numb etc. I failed to ask what would happen to me, what had happened, or how to cope, but was ushered out with a cheerio see you in two weeks. She never mentioned non viability so guess i just hoped my dates were wrong. Didnt tell anyone except DH who just thought, oh baby is small, nbd. until Sunday when he clicked. I did not want to be negative so just shut down.

Move on to today, walked into work and the loo shortly after, spotting pale pink. Walked out, Grabbed DH ( works near me) and hoped on the tube to the EPU. She said no scanning needed and to go home, grab pads, pain relief and watch tv. By this point i was an emotional wreck for a whole 8 mins but accepting to a point as had to walk through a crowed hospital and walk home.
So sitting here on my sofa with a vague tummy ache ( could still be the cyst as one side) but no other symptoms since... DH back at work, so having a pity party sponsored by chocolate. Guess i just hate the unknown, timing, pain etc. it is happening? Any advice on this?

Is it normal to feel so detached, numb and clueless?

So sorry that you're going through this. Don't be on your own, is there anyone who can stay with you until DH comes home? You're in a state of shock which is completely understandable.

It can be very painful and frightening when it finally comes. Timing can vary so it may not happen for a while. I had scan on Xmas Eve and didn't miscarry until NYE. Don't feel bad about cancelling plans and having some quiet time at home. Take some painkillers when you need to and make a hot water bottle if you can.

I'm so sorry, didn't want to read & run. I can't remember how I felt when I went through this - I've had 2 miscarriages at about the same stage. I do remember feeling clueless, there seems very much to be an expectation from medical staff that you know what will happen & that you'll just get on with it. A pity party is fine - I took a week off work both times as besides the pain I was an emotional wreck. If you can, talk to people - I've found most really understanding & I'm surprised how many have been through it. Take care of yourself

steve ginger Thanks both, still nothing since 9am so a bit this is so boring/agony/bleugh. ( and expensive as pity party moved onto online shopping.

Hi stuck. I was on the July thread with you I think.

I am kind of in the same boat.... Had a scan this morning and no fetal pole (sac was about 6 weeks... I should be nearly 8weeks

No bleeding no pain just sat on the sofa am occasionally sobbing and avoiding Christmas crap on TV

Partner and me are a new relationship he is at a loss and lives at a distance

My folks are gmdriving over but I am not sure I wouldn't rather be alone....

Anyway.... Hugs and solidarity. I am not sure ther me is anything else to do than sit and wait

I have an urge to walk up something tall and scream

beam yes I was July bus!

Sucks- over the weekend I went out for lunches, a party , work yesterday trying to act Normal. So hard yet sitting here - I prefer my
Own company than make smal talk I think. Now just have a super upset tummy... like I had when I went into labour with ds1. So
Could be a start of stuff ... goodness knows.

Sorry your dp doesn't know what to do- my DH is convinced we will have a scan and it will be ok ... he is also unsure what to or do and we have been together 9 years - must be so hard for the dads- helpless and unsure. We agreed his role would initially be chocolate provider until I know what to say to him.

beam sorry for your loss too - seems inadequate but hand holding.

I'm so sorry. I was also on the July thread although didn't post much. My miscarriage was confirmed last Wednesday and I opted for surgical management on Friday. Still bleeding and a bit achey.

Really feel for you and understand how you feel. Hope it's over soon for you - you can still go back to EPU and ask for intervention (either via surgery or a course of tablets that makes things move along more quickly).

and

brio sending to you and medicinal high in iron . Sorry for loss too. Epu said I have to wait to the 23rd for a rescan to confirm my dates were right or wrong and confirm non viability.... still no further bleeding here.... just a low ache.

Hope your bleeding and pain eases x