Second Mmc feeling lost

[Miami81]

We had a private scan on Saturday at 7+4 (due to previous Mmc where things had not progressed beyond 6+2), there was a little bean with a flicker of hb on Saturday but the sonographer dated it more then a week behind where it should have been and said she was concerned hb was slow.
We tried to persuade ourselves that it would be ok, I read all the online stories of babies that measured behind that caught up, but by Monday I had realised that we needed to get it confirmed. Went to the epu on Tuesday and hb had stopped and no sign of growth beyond 6 wks. We are devastated and really struggling to deal with this reality. It just feels so unfair.
Anyway my question I suppose is this - my second Mmc is almost exactly the same as first, no growth past a certain date, no hb, no actual mc yet, like my body is missing all the signals. Does anyone have any wisdom on potential causes? What happens at six weeks that isn't working?
I am aware that I am obsessing with the reasons, but it just hurts too much to think about it any other way at the moment.

I'm really sorry for your loss. It's so devastating, isn't it? I had one mmc and a friend of mine had two. We now have 5 children between us so please don't despair that it'll never happen for you. Sadly, it's just one of those things. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you.

Take care of yourself and allow yourself to grieve. But try to stay positive. I know it's hard. You'll find lots of support on here.

No wisdom as to why but just wanted to say I have been there. I had two miscarriages one straight after the other just a few months apart. We decided to take a little break from TTC after that. Waited 3 months then got pregnant as soon as we tried again and I was convinced the same thing was going to happen but I went on to have a normal pregnancy and now have a 2.5 yr old. I did have some spotting at 10 weeks but all OK on scan. I also have a 6 month old and had spotting in early pregnancy with her too.

Sorry for your losses and hope you have a happy outcome in time. Be kind and allow yourself to grieve

I'm sorry for your loss. Mc before 8-10 weeks is sadly fairly common. That doesn't make it any less devastating but it does mean that there isn't necessarily anything 'wrong' with you.

Have your losses been logged with your gp? It might be worth making an appointment to chat to them. I know usually they won't test before 3 losses but some gps might be able to give you advise on things that might help, baby aspirin for example.

💐xxx

I'm so sorry Miami81 - it's just the most shit and heartbreakingly awful thing to go through. I'm in a similar boat, I've had 3 miscarriages and an ectopic and feel so lost and hopeless. I feel like we'll never have a baby. Thinking of you xx

Thanks for all your lovely messages. The family grapevine/ jungle drums have gone up and I am being flooded with history from my aunts and cousins. My nana on my mom's side had 9 pregnancies that we know of (it was the fifties in Ireland there could have been many more that no one spoke about), she had at least one stillborn boy and three miscarriages. My 4 aunts all came early at around 7 months (we think possibly pre-eclampsia) and my uncle her youngest was the only baby she ever carried to term. My mom has only ever had girls and has always wondered if a few late periods were her boys and my aunt had 4 miscarriages too and her daughter has had two miscarriages and twins that came too early. So basically I think what that is saying to me is that I should pursue some tests or at least talk to someone about what seems like a pretty extensive history of complications in one family group! My sister also had two premature births due to pre-eclampsia. We are also the oldest set of cousins, there are many more girls who haven't started ttc yet. The only positive I am taking away from all this is that as a family group we are all talking about it (my mom didn't know her own sister had 4 miscarriages) and that even though it seems like a pretty harsh set of stats for one family, they all had babies. So I will not loose faith. I will get my baby, it is just going to be a harsher road then I had expected. Thanks again. I am finding the boards very helpful in taking my mind off what is happening.