Pain with miscarriage

[bob1985]

Hi all,

Sadly going through a miscarriage following ivf?😢 was 7 weeks. Had a scan this morning confirming. I passed the sac on Monday am. After this passed pain subsided significantly, however its returned this afternoon bad enough for me need to take max amount of painkillers. In general I've got a reasonable pain threshold. I'm just wondering if this is normal/to be expected? Hospital this morning adv there was very little 'material' still to pass and bleeding is like a normal period.

Bob. So sorry for your loss. How are you feeling now? We are just about to go through mc tomorrow, scan on Tuesday confirmed no growth or heartbeat.
I think I read somewhere that the uterine contractions can continue for a number of days afterwards. If you feel faint, run a temp or are losing loads of blood (I think they say filling a large pad in less then 0.5hrs) even after you have passed the main elements then please take yourself to hospital.
When I went through before I rand nhs24 and they got me straight through to the epu, which meant I didn't have to sit in a&e thankfully. All the best.

I'm sorry for your loss bob and you too miami. I think the pain from a natural miscarriage can be pretty severe as you body tries to rid itself of the remaining tissue and this can stop and start for a while. Miami gives sound advice - if it gets severe or you feel really unwell then call the hospital. Hope things have been better over night.

I too have just had a miscarriage after IVF - a special kind of cruel isn't it? I went to my harmony scan on Monday and saw a perfect baby at just under 10 weeks but sadly no heartbeat despite seeing a strong heartbeat just over two weeks before. Had an ERPC yesterday. It was grim but I needed it to be over.

Hi Miami and Tiger,

Thank you for your replies and I'm so sorry for you both. It really is a special kind of cruel. We also saw a heartbeat just a few days before on the scan and got so excited thinking this was our turn. But sadly not to be. I'm feeling a little better this morning, had quite a big 'gush' around 4am and pain seems to have eased off a bit and bleeding slowed. Just all a bit scary, never been in this position before so it's hard to know what's 'normal'. Glad there are places like this to get wee bit advice and to feel not as alone.

Miami I hope things go as well as they can for you. ❤️

Tiger, hope you are feeling ok and taking care of yourself ❤️

Oh god, tiger, I'm so sorry, I left the berry FB group because I couldn't face getting updates but I also went for a harmony test on Saturday and it is also an MMC. I didn't post anything because it was the day of another berry's section and because I knew you also had a harmony test coming up and might get worried! I could only get seen by the NHS today who couldn't go on the private scan so rescanned, and because mine is so small their policy is to rescan in 14 days, all to cater for the instadiffers who don't know exactly when they conceived! ERPC booked for the 19th unless it happens naturally before that, which sounds horrendous based on the descriptions on here.

Oh shit lady, I'm sorry to hear that, I was also wondering how you were getting on as we got our bfps at the same time.

My scan was private too but they accepted the report at my EPU and rescanned me later that day to confirm no heartbeat so all fairly conclusive and quick. My dates matched up to the scan, so they didn't query. To be honest - I woke up three days before the harmony scan and I just knew in my heart there and then that the baby wasn't ok. I was hoping it was just my anxiety getting the better of me but I felt a subtle shift in how I was feeling and I knew it wasn't right.

I'm very grateful they treated me as an emergency and booked me in 48 hours later. I hope you are ok in the wait for your procedure. Big hugs.

Definitely not alone bob. Glad you are feeling better. It is bloody scary. Sorry for tmi and but I passed some pieces of tissue last night and it was really upsetting as I wasn't expecting it. I thought they would have removed it all. It really is harrowing from start to finish.

Bob - hopefully if everything has settled down that will be the worst of the physical discomfort passed for you.
Be nice to yourself, make sure you are hydrated and have b vitamins and iron. I have been here before and I found that the vitamins etc did help as your energy levels really get sapped by the whole thing.
I am in the epu at 8.30 in the morning. Will be having the tablets as I had them before and they work for me and I am really scared of surgery. I was going to maybe try and wait it out and just let it happen naturally but decided that is too much of an emotional trauma as it could be anything up to four weeks from here. All the best ladies. I am so sorry that we are all going through this. It is so beyond words how I am feeling. Just numb. You never think it's going to be you, and then I never thought it would be me again a second time. This year sucks.

Tiger just keep an eye on things through today. I am sure what happened last night was just a side effect of the procedure. I am sure they gave you numbers and things to ring of you are not ok. Please use them if you are at all unsure.

Lady - a 14 day wait is quite tough. They made me wait a week the last time as the baby has to be a certain size with no hb before they can sign off on it. But this time they went through my dates in detail with me and asked what date I got the bfp, which I remember because it was our first wedding anniversary. So for what they were seeing on the scan to work date wise we would have had to conceive after the BFP. So basically what I am trying to say is that if you find the two weeks too much it is really worth pushing a little if you want to. It is different for everyone though and I know different places have different policies. If it is an option for you I think it is also possible to go private for erpc with Bupa or whoever. But as I say everyone is different, I couldn't face the uncertainty of waiting. My thoughts are with you. The limbo with little to no hope is really hard.

Also lady - sorry I feel like I am completely hijacking this thread but I want to reassure you a bit. If it does happen naturally it is pretty rough, there are a few things to prepare in advance for if it does happen. The big blue night time always pads are good. Have your hot water bottle handy. I have codeine, paracetamol and nurofen max express waiting in my bedside drawer - space them out (I kept a record of when I was taking them on my phone and OH was in charge of dosing). I took the tablets so things for me were a little more concentrated in time I think then for those who are natural, be prepared to sit on the loo, again OH was in charge of keeping me supplied with tea, magazines and sweets. So what I am trying to say is make sure you have supplies in. From start to finish mine was pretty much all done in around 4 hrs. It is daunting but you will get through it. Listen to your body and your instincts. If it seems like too much pain too much whatever then it probably is.

I'm really sorry this has happened to you - it's horrific to be dealing with such physical pain when you're in emotional pain too. When I have had a mc, I've always been really surprised by how painful they can be - I think that, while we're getting better at talking about them in general, this is one aspect that isn't discussed. In fact, I don't think I'd ever heard anyone mention it before it happened to me.

I've never had a loss beyond 13 weeks, but a midwife once told me that the contractions are disproportionately painful because your body isn't ready to not be pregnant, if that makes sense. If you were full term, yes it would hurt, but your body would be doing what it had to do. With miscarriage, it's the wrong time, so the pain can be really intense.

I now know how long it takes my body to do each stage, but there is certainly one point where it seems like wave after wave (and I have very painful, very heavy periods). I'd agree that you should take as much pain medication as you are given, but seek help if it seems more than you can manage.

Miami I really tried to push for it, told them I know I ovulated on Sept 29th and we haven't had sex since then! BFP on Oct 9th so basically impossible to fit with the scan but they are rigidly sticking to their protocol. I asked about going private but they said it would only happen "if I could find someone that would act outside of recommended guidelines." Only option I think would be to have a TOP privately but I'm not sure how long that process takes and I don't fancy being in the same place as women aborting healthy babies. The consultant phoned me today because I put in a PALS complaint about the delay in getting an EPAU appointment but they aren't budging. The reason it is 14 days rather than 7 is because the sac was slightly bigger compared to the private scan and they could see a fetal pole, so having said they were disregarding the private scan they actually used it to make the wait longer! Thank you for the advice on managing, I have paracetamol and ibuprofen but no codeine. My main worry was that it would start really suddenly while I was at work in theatre (I'm an anaesthetist) but I've been signed off work for 3 weeks. If the NHS want to play these games then I don't see the point in busting a gut trying to cope with work in the NHS!

Oh lady. That's horrid. I think maybe they are being a bit more relaxed with the rules for me is because I have been there before if that makes sense at all.
Yep I was really panicky about it starting really suddenly as well, which is why I haven't been to work. I went for a 20 minute walk earlier and just decided I had to get back to the house as it was making me very anxious. I have pretty strong stomach cramps at the moment so wondering if it is going to happen itself this evening. There is a part of me that would prefer that. Just for the inevitable pain etc to be over.
All the best.