I am looking to see if anyone has had or is having a similar experience to me. I am 41 years of age and still not yet a mother but very much trying to be.
Pregnancy No. 1 - Failed: At age 39, I started trying for a baby with my husband in June 2014 on our honeymoon. Only a month later I conceived. By October 2014 (at around 14 weeks) I had to terminate the pregnancy as the baby was diagnosed with straight forward Trisonomy 21 (Down Syndrome) and was extremely sick ie. leaky heart valve and did not look like a bright future for it at all. It was truly a traumatic experience and still today I get upset about that loss as I had many scans on this one and saw my baby's beatiful little fingers, toes and all.
Pregnancy No. 2 - Failed: After some healing time, my husband I tried again in July 2015 (Age 40) and in yet again just one month I was pregnant again! But unfortunatley, the pregnancy failed - at my 7 week scan they detected an empty sac (known as blighted ovum) so at around 9 weeks I went in to have an ERPC.
Pregnancy No. 3 - Failed: In November 2015 at age 41 (after just having one period following the last ERPC), we tried again and yet again, in a month I fell pregnant again. This time at 7 weeks the scan went well and a heartbeat was detected and I was told everything looks normal. And now, just 2 weeks later (9 weeks pg), I am miscarrying. The sonographer scanned me at 9 weeks advising that the baby had only grown by 1mm since the 7 week scan so it passed away pretty much following the scan that I had.
To add to the above, in July 2015, I was diagnosed with an over-active thyroid (mild case and due Graves disease.. likely to have been bought on by stress from loss of baby number 1). When I was diagnosed with the over active thyroid, I had already conceived with my second pregnancy so my second loss (blighted ovum) could have been to do with the thyroid problem. However, since then, I have been under brilliant care by a thyroid specialist who has put me on a medication that is safe for pregnancy called PTU and prior to my 3rd pregnancy, I was given the green light to proceed with conceiving as my thyroid was (and still is) in normal range. I still have to continue taking PTU for at least the next year but my specialist said women on this medication are fine to proceed with pregnancy and will go onto have healthy babies.
Although I see the above as 3 losses, the doctors etc. are telling me it's only two ie. 2 miscarriages and the down-syndrome was a seperate issue / reason. They tell me 2 miscarriages is the norm at my age and if I am conceiving ok (which I am) then to just keep trying. I do feel lucky that I am conceiving so quickly as that seems to be a major issue for many women, and it's very good that I do, but I just can't seem to actually hold a baby for it to make a healthy one. :-(
I am just so worried that I am never going to be able to actually have a baby. Any feedback or similar experiences would be appreciated. Thanks.