I thought I was OK

[VulvaVoom]

3 weeks ago today I lost my baby to an ectopic pregnancy. I was quite proud with the way I was coping, feeling quite pragmatic and spending my time off work watching Netflix.

Today has been different. Today I was due yo go back to work but I've had some sort of meltdown. I told work I would be extending my sick note, dropped DD off at nursery then went to Asda and wandered around aimlessly.

I then came home and cried while I washed up. It's the first time since I was in hospital.

I can only put it down to it 'hitting me'. I've just found out a friend is pregnant, last week I did the preg test I was told to, to make sure I'm not, and Christmas is coming up when we were going to tell everyone.

I'm just really very sad. Thanks for reading.

IT is really sad and it's ok to cry.

I found out on Saturday that I only have an empty sac and my baby is gone. I also feel a bit up and down and I seem to cry at unexpected moments

I think hormones may also play a part. This is horrible sad news plus your (our) hormones must be all over the place.

Do you have somebody in real life you can cry at? I phoned my mum for an hour this morning and told her how bloody unfair the whole thing is

So sorry this happened to you. Well done for extending your sick note.

Cry as much as you need

I had a MMC almost 3 years ago. I still feel sad about it. I still think about it.

Allow yourself to grieve for your baby. Allow yourself to heal & come to terms whats happened. The Miscarriage Association were a great help to me.

Take care of yourself. X

Crying is perfectly normal as is a delayed reaction. We had a miscarraige at 17wks this week last year and it was terribly hard. Lots of crying when I was on my own, lots of aimlessness - Christmas helped me as it was something else to concentrate on, I focussed on spoiling DS and lots of cuddles.
We planted a tree to remember our baby in the new year.
Look after yourself, give yourself time and it will get easier, you won't forget, but it will get easier.

Thanks for your kind messages. I hope I can manage to enjoy Christmas.