Missed miscarriage

[DizzyMerry]

I went for my 12 week scan today. Was given the devastating news that there was no heartbeat and the baby stopped growing at 8 weeks. My head is all over the place at the moment. They gave me options of how to miscarry and I opted for medical management after the Dr said this is what they mostly recommend first. I wanted some time to process the news so booked it for Friday. I'm now worried about it being a brutal experience and the amount of pain. Also don't think I could pass out my baby like this. Will my waters break? Will it feel like labour? I'm now thinking I should go for the surgical option instead. I have a DD to look after and although I have loads of support I'm worried about it being a long drawn out process. I'm an emotional wreck and just can't think straight.

Would appreciate experiences from others who have unfortunately had to go through this. Did you have medical management and how was it? Is surgery the better option?

Ahhhcant, wendy and twinkly I'm so sorry you've all been through this horrid stuff. I know it was the sac and I'll never forget the feeling of passing it. As soon as it happened I cried and said 'I'm not pregnant anymore'. The bleeding is still heavy but not pouring out now. I'll call the hospital later to see what they say. What a nightmare this has been and this forum has been a great support. I didn't know what to expect until I read about other people's experiences.

I've just been reading this thread & am so sorry for what you've all been through.
I found out at my scan on Thursday when I should have been 13 weeks that the pregnancy stopped developing at about 6 weeks. I have appointment at the EPU for this Thursday to be re-scanned & discuss options but yesterday I started having light bleeding & this morning it's heavier & with some cramps.
I just feel so alone (although DH is being supportive) & devastated at the moment.

Oh mrsvaliant I'm so sorry you're also going through this. My heart goes out to everyone who has to experience this devastation. It is a lonely and dark place despite having loads of support around us. I miscarried on Tuesday and although the physical part is over, apart from light bleeding, the emotional roller coaster continues. It will take time and I'm just taking each day at a time. The 'practical advice' thread linked to on here helped me immensely. Be as prepared as you can be; the best pads you can get, I have endo so use tena ladies but doubled up with tesco maxi pads and a winged pad underneath, big knickers, strong painkillers and a hot water bottle which I found so helpful and comforting. Have everything ready in the bathroom with lots of loo roll. Let your DH take care of you. Do whatever you want to get through this and if that means staying in bed, staying indoors then do that. It's horrible but the physical side didn't last too long.

I know exactly how you're feeling right now, as do others who have been through this. Here for hand holding

Thank you DizzyMerry for your kind words.
Strangely as the cramps have got worse today my emotional state has got better. I think concentrating on the physical practicalities right now is helping

MrsValient so sorry that you are going through this too. I also found that I felt less emotional when I had to concentrate on the physical stuff, it's as if you can only cope with one thing at a time. Thinking of you tonight

Thinking of you MrsValient. If it helps, the worst of the physical part will not last too long. Give yourself time and get as much support as you can. You will be exhausted afterwards.

I'm new to this site and have come across this post. I know it's a few weeks ago but this is happening to me now, is there a way of seeing if anyone else has posted recently, rather than asking you all to relive the heartache when it happened to you. Im hoping for a bit of support, and advice to get through what seems like the longest week of my life. Thanks.

Dizzy, just wanted to say I also had a missed miscarriage at the weekend which was medically induced. DH & I had already discussed what to do with remains. Please don't feel bad. I passed two sacs. One was only 5w2d and the other 6w4d but as I fished around & found it, I was expecting to recognise something and it was just blood and gunge in a sac. It wasn't my baby. Just physical matter it had used for a while. I got DH to flush the loo as I couldn't bring myself to do it. We decided against burying them as each time I gardened or a cat dug away I knew I'd be heartbroken.

Please don't torture yourself over it.

FYI anyone having a medically induced miscarriage, it makes your body reject everything. Pregnancy, stomach contents, bowel contents, ALL at the same time. It isn't pretty.

So sorry you're also going through this zozzle. It was definitely the worst week of my life. I don't wish to add to your upset by asking any questions. However, if you would like to ask anything please do. Here for hand holding.

Ranchgirl I'm so sorry for your losses. That was my worry with being medically induced and I'm sure it'll help others make a decision in these awful circumstances. Thank you for your support and it is something I still think about. I didn't see my baby on the scan but DH did and said he'll never forget. That's something I still regret too and torment myself with. I just wasnt thinking straight at the time but wish I did see my baby as it would have been the last chance I ever got.