MMC how do I cope?

[Whyme20]

Hi all

I was pregnant with my first at 10.2weeks just had my first midwife appointment and was feeling very excited! I started to experience some spotting and after the second day decided to call the doctor, I was sent for a scan on Friday to be told that there was no heartbeat which you would expect at 10weeks and that it was likely my baby stopped growing five weeks ago! They have told me there's a small chance my dates are wrong and to go back for a second scan in 10days! I have had two lots of clotted bleeding each roughly a tablespoon and some slight cramping! I think I'm miscarrying how do I cope with going to the loo and wondering what I will find!

I'm hurting prey bad emotionally, no one I know has been through this I feel so sad and lonely! I can't stop crying for the baby I'll never meet!
Thanks for reading

I'm so sorry. It's frightening and devastating and all you can think is why is this happening

I've had 3 mc's in the last year including a mmc so I feel your pain

Best thing to do is read this

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/1344311-Tips-for-coping-with-the-practicalities-of-miscarriage

At the stage you are also at you will need to think about your options if the worst happens

Natural, medically managed or surgical. I've had natural with my first and surgical with other two as these were right for me. But it really is an individual choice

I'm so sorry there are lots of ladies on here that have been through it and can offer hand holding

Hi Whyme

So sorry you're going through this. It happened to me 2 weeks ago. I should have been 12 weeks but scan showed no heartbeat and only 9 week size baby.

I opted to have an ERPC to complete the mc following a horrendous night in A&E bleeding and contracting.

This thread has totally helped me get through it...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/2327423-Headwreck-Hope-Support-for-those-who-are-might-be-experiencing-MMC-MC-early-pregnancy-loss?

The crying is exactly what I went through !

Thank you both for your comments. I started heavy bleeding this morning and lots of cramping! Iv been bleeding all day and feeling pretty crappy! Iv moved the scan to Friday as that's the earliest I could have the second one done! The amount Iv bleed I hope Iv past most of it and that by Friday it will all be over!

I want to get my life back on track and start again! Iv come to terms with the fact that this baby has died because it wouldn't have been healthy but emotionally I'm still wrecked!
X

Can you go to a walk in EPU ? There should be one near you - I went to 2 different ones near me. The walk in times are usually 8am til about 11 but it's very worth it. Google it for your area !!

I'm going through similar OP.

I just want to stop bleeding. It's like a constant reminder. I am exhausted mentally and feel like the bleeding is making me physically weak.

I want someone to tell me when it'll stop but I know they can't!

Sorry if it sounds like a hijack - but you're not alone x

Of course it's not a hijack! It's horrible isn't it! However I feel that I've seperated the bleeding from the loss! Don't get my wrong the bleeding and pain are horrible and like you said physically draining and feeling a bit weak! But the loss is the worst I was thinking I would have a baby by Christmas and looking at tiny clothes I could buy for it, now those thoughts are trashed! When the expected due date comes round it's all going to feel so sad again! I just hope that by then I will be able to say I'll have a baby in the new year and the one I lost will be fondly remembered! As I will have something to look forward to rather than just sadness! I hope that you are feeling better soon! X

Whyme when you're ready to try again look at this thread....

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2334512-TTC-after-MC-5?

I'm reading and following it until we start trying then I'll properly post. The ladies on there are lovely and very knowledgeable

Hi Whyme, I'm sorry for your difficult time. I know only too well the elation and the crushing blow of what you're going through. I've been there three times and I'm now tentatively hopeful of my pregnancy of 7wks.

What got me through was being kind to myself. I took time off work and bought in all the things I hadn't been allowed, pate, blue cheese, sushi, a shitload of wine. This helped me because it seemed like the very faint silver lining in all this. I allowed myself a week of indulging my every whim and then tried (it's hard I know) to get back to normal.

Do whatever you want; talk, don't talk, cry, scream, says it's not fair because it isn't!!

After one MC we booked a hol and just buggered off. Could that be an option?

Your stats are still good, you're much more likely to have a successful pregnancy next time, after three, I am
not but I'm hopeful!!

Hi fackinell I'm sorry to hear of your pain I keeping all my fingers crossed for you!

I have been kind to myself I have taken some time off work now that the bleeding is heavy! I won't be going on any holidays too far away but a break maybe on the cards!

xx

I'm glad you're being good to yourself. I hope you have a wonderful support team beside you. Wishing you lots of success for your future, miracles can and do happen every day. Xx