Tips to get you back on track when you want to give up?

[Sealpup38]

Hi guys,

Does anyone have any tips/strategies with coping when you feel like you'd like to give up on all the things impacting on pregnancy? I just had a ERPC after trying to conceive for ages (I believed my teachers when they said I would get pregnant if I even touched a boy!), and am finding that I want to jack loads of stuff in. I have a really physically and mentally demanding job and M.E so I'm tired ALL the time. Since getting pregnant, my out look changed and I started to worry less about deadlines and what people thought because I knew it wasn't the most important thing anymore. Is this just my hormones because, at the moment, I want to change lots of things that once made me smile? Xx

Don't change the things that made u smile, life changes when this happens and it does make u realise things aren't really that important and the important things u can't control, have u been to a councillor? I have been seeing one and it's helped my head ALOT I wasn't going to work for months I wasn't doing anything I did give up on everything that's normal to me....it won't help - the good thing is that u have noticed it so it's u that can help urself, work should be understanding of your situation and if there not then make them because having support through work was one thing that has majorly helped if your not up to work go to the gp, get signed off, they can sign u off completely or they could give u half days or shortened hours, I've had all of these to get myself back full time and it helps, just try to get back sooner than later or it makes u feel worse
But really there is no rush to be normal, I had my mmc in Sept, I only jus gone back to full hours last week.....it does get better, I promise u on that one it will get better but u do have to look after you now...And if work really doesn't make u happy, just don't make any rash decisions just yet, if ur trying again remember u have to work certain amount of time before full maternity leave so don't shoot urself in the foot either, I dont know your story but I no how u feel and it does change on a day to day basis and its not easy to deal with and it does take a strong mind, u will be a lot stronger at the end of all this then u were before

I had medical management just over 4 weeks ago. I thought I was 12 weeks but the pregnancy had ended at 9. I can identify with every single word you have written. I took things an hour at a time, when I was feeling a bit better I took things a morning/afternoon at a time, then a day at a time. Now I look to get through the next few days before taking a deep breath and going for the next few. There's been setbacks - a surprise pregnancy at a social meeting I go to every other month, OH getting over it in the drop of a hat and telling me I 'just had to move on' - but these setbacks don't mean you can't and won't get there. Don't push yourself to get back to doing things too quickly, and definitely talk to someone if you feel you need to. A lot of my talking has been on here and the ladies here are amazing.

Thank you for taking the time to reply. You're both very right - it comes in waves! I know that I need to change the stress and pressure so that I'm fit and healthy but I can do this without being too drastic. When everything went wrong I just wanted to get rid of anything impacting on my ability to get pregnant but I didn't know exactly what that was. I'm sure things will become a little clearer. Thanks again xx