How long will it be like this?

[funnylittlekaty]

I lost our baby last week, overnight on weds/Thursday. I should have had my dating scan on Friday at 12+3, but I think the baby had died quite a bit earlier. I think I passed the sac either at home on the loo or in a and e when the gynae consultant was rooting around with the speculum with blood everywhere and me sobbing.
I feel completely empty. I haven't cried much since Thursday day when I got on to the ward. I wish I could cry but I just feel grey and exhausted and like this is all a terrible mistake and I am still having my baby.
I have a ds who is nearly 4 and I'm normal in front of him but the rest of the time I just want to sit in bed or sleep.
When did you feel normal again? And how long did it take for your period to come back?
Thanks

Hi Katy I'm so sorry for your loss. I went through a miscarriage in September and wouldn't wish it on anyone. I think the answers to your questions are different for everyone. I unfortunately took a long time physically to heal with irregular periods that didn't settle down. One of my friends had a miscarriage a couple weeks before me and her period came back regular pretty much straight away and she healed really quickly physically however 6 months later is unfortunately still suffering but has finally gone to her docs who has given her therapy. If you feel you need help it's always best to ask for it early on as there are some great resources. It may help finding a thread on here for ladies who have miscarriaged. I know some can be hard to keep up with but I found it helpd me not feel like I was the only one.

Hi Katy ... Sorry you are doing through this! I had a mc in December and I am only just getting back to normal! My HCG stayed high and I didn't get a negative test untill 9 weeks after and only just got my 1st AF at the end of feb! It is so frustrating that you don't know what your body is doing!

I also struggled mentally and felt like I was being punished for something! But I signed up to run a marathon which has really sorted my head out .... Gives me something to focus on!

I think all women are different .... Some get back to normal within a couple of weeks, some fall pregnant before having a period and others just take time! My advice would be to stay positive and take every hour bit by bit and I promise you will feel better soon xxxx

Thank you both. I appreciate the replies and advice. I know it will all take time to come right again, physically and with my mental state. People say I'm being brave but I'm not, I'm just numb and empty. Don't think I've faced up to it yet.

And I'm so sorry for both your losses. X

I know exactly how you feel right now.I lost Michael on Weds.
I feel so lost...I don't know what to do with myself, and feel so down and empty I just want to never go back to work or seeing people... I joined on a few of these sites after my OH recommended prob best for me to talk to people who are going through it.... It feels like a surreal dream and it can't really be happening...

I am so sorry and heartbroken for you because it's exactly how I feel. I hope you are able to cope better than I am doing

I'm so sorry evilfairy. How far on was your pregnancy? It doesn't seem like anything will be normal again does it? I'm waking up, taking my son to nursery, sleeping, collecting him, repeat repeat. The thought of going to work and having to deal with things makes me exhausted. I still can't accept this has happened. It's the reimagining everything in the future without this lovely exciting thing in it that's so hard. Everything is so flat.

14 weeks but he stopped growing at about 12 +5
I agree everything is so empty and stale.
You adjust your life around this little person coming into your life.
I was looking into a career change to help be around more and make more money, we rehomed our dog as she wasn't suitable with kids, started painting room and planning our future...even our wedding was being adjusted... and it all seems so trivial and empty now...Now I just want to hide away and be invisible as I don't know what to do from here.

Oh god the dog! That's so sad. I just read your thread and cried and cried. I had to stop halfway through. I'm so so sorry that this horrible thing happened to you. I know I'm so lucky because I have my little boy but I feel so strongly that our family isn't complete. I keep thinking about how it feels to feed the baby. Argh.