Can't cope! Depression and maybe PTSD

[Boofsandboss]

I had a mmc in November
It was the worst experience in my life! All I want is my little angel In my arms! I've been told to accept it but I can't I want my baby! The miscarriage was horrible I ended up in hospital as I was losing too much blood, I thought I was dying and now all I see when I close my eyes is me being in hospital and the blood gushing out of me! I can't enjoy my life anymore it's getting between
Me and my partner, I don't know what to do

Hi boofs I'm so sorry you lost your baby. Who is telling you to accept it? A couple of months is actually quite a short time to be grieving, if it was any other family member you'd lost nobody would be telling you that you should be over it already. If you are struggling with flashbacks it would probably be helpful to talk to someone - either a debrief with the hospital or a counsellor.
Did you do anything to commemorate the loss? That is sometimes helpful in moving forwards. It's a series of little steps towards feeling better, and sometimes you'll be blindsided by a pregnancy announcement or a significant date, but gradually life gets back to normal. It's a process you can't rush, you need to work through it at your own pace. Don't let anyone else tell you how you should feel.

It has been a very short time. I had to collect a friend from hospital and was shocked and overwhelmed by the memories, it stays with you. But there is a bitter sweet day where those feelings don't interfere with your day.
It is a lot to process. Don't push yourself to 'accept'. You need to grieve and talking through your experiences will help you go through this. I suppose I came to terms with the losses before dealing with the physical trauma and horror of it all. But we're all different.
Small steps don't rush.

Boof sorry for your loss. I feel the same as you I had my 3rd Mac in December and the first two were natural the third was similar to what you explain.

I spoke to my go who suggested the miscarriage association as they offer counselling more rapid than the nhs.

Hurts like hell doesn't it. There are no words. Look after yourself and the words people say are true. Be kind to yourself.