struggling - when does it get better?

[WouldRatherHaveWine]

After posting here for advice it looked like I had a very early miscarriage, after 10 days all pregnancy tests were back to negative.

I'm just really struggling to come to terms with it.

My best friend had been ttc for a long time and had a miscarriage, and finally got her bfp. After having severe pain she had to go to epu and I went along. So I'm sat there still (at the time) bleeding and terrified she will have the same result. But there on the screen was this tiny blob with a heart beat flickering away.

Utter elation for her, but shamefully a lot of jealousy too. Based on dates we would have been days apart. I sobbed for hours after. I can't stop thinking about that blob and how it's not mine. She is announcing to family tomorrow. I want to cry again. And I feel like a terrible friend

Hi. No one can tell you how to feel.I had a mc after 6 weeks about 3 weeks ago.Today I am an emotional mess.It just hit me this morning.Cant stop crying.We were going to tell our parents today.
I guess you have to let yourself cry if thats what you need to do and hope that 2015 is your year.I have friends who have had a mc then concieved straight aftr.Its hard but thats what keeps me going the hope that this could be the month.
I hope you make the most of christmas and time with loved ones.Good luck xxxx

I'm really struggling today too. We was supposed to announce our pregnancy today but unfortunately i miscarried on the 10th at 10 weeks. I haven't really felt much since then, I've just been pottering around feeling numb. Today it has hit me with full force. 3 people I know have announced that they are pregnant today. One in particular is due on my due date. I just feel so sad. Jealous and sad.

Bah humbug.

Ps you are by no means a terrible friend. I feel exactly the same way. Its perfectly normal and somewhat expected after a miscarriage I think.

You just about learn to live with it but it does get better.

I had my second IVF miscarrige Christmas Eve 2013.

I broke down earlier - the pain suddenly overtook me. There are two people missing today, people we never got to meet and my heart is broken, both our hearts are broken.

However, we are lucky we have each other and another cycle in the new year. I'm trying to hold onto that.

I can tell you though that while the pain is indescribable at times like this (anniversaries, Christmas, pregnancies of others - I cannot even do that naturally) it does get easier.

I was suicidal last year. I have hope and controllable (just) sadness at those who should be with us just now.

You will learn how to live and enjoy life again.

Thank you for the replies and support ladies
it has been a long day and I did have one sobbing fit once I was alone. We will not be trying again for at least 6mo (this was a happy accident) so I'm feeling a bit lost and in limbo.

I hope you ladies had some happy moments today