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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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MMC at just under 12 weeks

40 replies

teeniedeenie34 · 17/12/2014 09:28

On Sunday I was 11+5 with my first pregnancy. I went to the toilet and found brown blood discharge in my underwear. Having kept very well, and had no bleeding so far, this came as a little bit of a shock so I called the Early Pregnancy Unit at the hospital for advice. I was told to wear a pad and monitor the bleeding but was assured that this can be quite common around the 12 week mark as the hormone levels drop and the placenta takes over. Later in the evening I started bleeding red blood and I totally panicked so rushed to A&E. I ended up being put to the gynaecology ward to wait and seen a doctor five hours later. She gave me an internal examination and said that there was blood but my cervix was still tightly closed which meant that at that moment I wasn't miscarrying. She also echoed the advice about the placenta taking over. I got sent home and the doctor advised I should get a scan on Monday for peace of mind. I ended up having an internal scan as my bladder wasn't full enough for an abdominal one and after a few moments we knew something was wrong. The gestational sac was fully formed and the correct size but the fetus was tiny wee and has stopped growing very early on. A MMC. The sac was an irregular shape and was starting to collapse, which suggests the bleeding I had on the Sunday night was my body starting to realise something was wrong and the very early beginnings of a miscarriage. The midwife gave us lots of information about my different options and I felt completely numb as to what to do next. I started bleeding heavily on Monday night however and naturally passed the sac and lots of clots. The bleeding has really slowed now so imagine everything that needed to come out, has. Sunday night gave us a warning that something might be wrong but I'm so glad we had the scan and found out about the fetus before the heavy bleeding started this evening. Yesterday was supposed to be my booking scan and I was supposed to be going into work today with happy news before coming off for Christmas, however I've just had to call my boss and let them know what has happened and that I have been signed off until Christmas, meaning I won't return until the new year. My and my OH's hopes, plans and dreams for the near future have been shattered by this and we are heartbroken.

OP posts:
September60b · 21/12/2014 10:39

So very sorry to you both. I had a mmc last year and I promise things will get easier. Currently sat here at 37 weeks pg with a baby I was convinced I wouldn't have. It's totally ok to cry, be angry, upset. I hope you both get lots of support over the next few weeks.

fromwesttoeast · 21/12/2014 12:06

Sorry for all the losses.
Teenie, if you keep getting episodes of heavy bleeding and cramps that may indicate some retained tissue, or something stuck. Another poster on here experienced this recently. You should get it checked out.

teeniedeenie34 · 21/12/2014 12:58

Santa, it must have been a real shock when you passed the sac last night after thinking everything had gone... It does make me question how much they can see and what they tell you to expect/is going to happen. I'm so sorry. Are you bleeding heavily again? I was passing golf ball sized clots on Friday, anyone of them could've been the sac really but the shape of the one I passed on Monday night looked more like it. It's hard to tell. I hope you're feeling ok today and getting plenty rest. Xx

OP posts:
teeniedeenie34 · 21/12/2014 13:06

fromwest, sept and monten, thank you all so much for your kind words and I'm sorry to hear you have all experienced similar...

I was worried about retained tissue but will see how I get on today with the bleeding and if no better will call EPU tomorrow and ask what I should do. In hindsight, if I'd known how much tissue/clots/blood I would lose, and how long it would take, I would have definitely went for the surgical option however when my body started miscarrying naturally on Sunday night, I felt it was best to let nature take it's course. Problem is, they can't tell you how much/little you will pass and how long it will/won't take as each woman is different.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 21/12/2014 13:13

Had to come back and say you did NOT cause this. I remember going over everything I had done and eaten.
Please be gentle in yourself. People are always here for a handhold. x

Wolfiefan · 21/12/2014 13:13

Gentle in yourself?!?!?!
Sorry.

VirtualSantaHat · 21/12/2014 13:30

Bleeding seems to have stopped again now, but I'm terrified to leave the house as last night in 10 seconds blood had soaked my underwear and trousers

What i passed was definitely the sac but I know from talking to Dsis that she never knew as I suppose it was smaller.

I'm going to stay home until I have stopped bleeding for a day or so I think

Take care xx and thanks to everyone for your words

SaltySeaBird · 21/12/2014 13:36

It's heartbreaking.

I've had one MMC and another MC that happened just days after our second scan (having seen the heartbeat twice so assuming all was okay).

We started trying straight away after the first one and almost a year to the day of the miscarriage our amazing DD was born.

We are just about to start trying after the last MC which was six month ago now. It took me a long time to get over it both physically and emotionally - there is no right answer as to when it is right to try again. Take time for yourselves.

VirtualSantaHat · 21/12/2014 14:08

DH is upset I am not doing more around the house. To be fair I haven't got out of bed today. How can I explain to him that not only am I emotionally a mess like he is too, but physically not well, shaky etc?

teeniedeenie34 · 21/12/2014 14:31

That's not on Santa, if you are not feeling well then resting is the best thing for you to do. If he is feeling ok perhaps he can tackle the housework and let you rest? I started to do some yesterday but then got very dizzy and had to sit down. Housework and even Christmas can wait, it's all about healing physically and emotionally at the moment. Hugs Xx

OP posts:
mumtobe01 · 23/12/2014 09:45

Wondering if anyone can help :-( I had a bit of spotting, not very much but got referred for an early scan to double check. I was pretty much 11 weeks. Devastated as my baby looked perfectly formed but had not survived passed 8ish weeks. I was treated terribly by the hospital and put in a room for 2 and a half hours. Was told a Dr was coming to see us- we waited and waited and then no- no-one was available so we were sent home. The earliest I ould have an ERPC a was a week later so we used our private medical insurance which I have never been so grateful for. I just feel like I cannot move on- have no idea what happened or where to turn. We are lucky enough to have an 18 month old who hubbie is being great with but I am struggling to get out of bed and struggling with all the social things we should be going to. I just want to crawl into bed, pull the duvet over my head and never get up again. We were desperate for a sibling for our son but not sure I can put myself through this again- when do you get to a stage when you can believe all is ok? Sorry for the long post but don't feel I have anyone that understands. A best friend is due 3 days before I was so now just have to sit back and watch her bloom. Of course I am delighted for her but it is so hard :-(

fromwesttoeast · 23/12/2014 12:15

Sorry for your loss mumtobe. You have been through a terrible shock and will now need a period of grieving. Everyone has to deal with this in their own way, you need to give yourself time and space to come to terms with your loss.
In time you should feel better able to function normally again, most women will recover from mc and go on to have a healthy pregnancy. You don't need to despair that you will never have a sibling for your DC.
It does help to post on here as so many others will be able to emphasise with your situation and are ready to listen and support.
Sorry not to be of more help, but didn't want to read and run. Flowers

Monten · 23/12/2014 16:12

Hi mumtobe as fromwest says you have been through a terrible shock. You are grieving your baby. Be kind to yourself. Sadly, care seems to be very patchy and your experience at hospital isn't unheard of. You will feel better and you will go on to have another successful pregnancy Flowers

VirtualSantaHat · 23/12/2014 16:41

Hi mum, so sorry for your loss it is truly shit. I don't think there is anything tag naked it fair. My Dsis had her 20 week scan today and while I am
Happy for her I am so hurt for myself.

Maybe worth talking to the doctor if if is still hard to get out if bed in a week or so as I hear mc counselling can be very beneficial.

Take care xx

mumtobe01 · 23/12/2014 20:54

Thank you so much ladies xxxx

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