3 m/c in a row with possibly of ectopic!

[dazedandconfused1981]

I am currently going through another m / c, 3rd in a row.

My first happened at 6 weeks started with some bleeding , 2nd was 9.5 weeks only picked up at scan, had to go through medical management and 3rd at 7 weeks, bleeding and possibly ectopic due to hormone levels falling slowly.

With each pregnancy comes hope that is quickly taken away and I am left feeling lost, empty and completely devastated. With each m/c comes more complications that stop me from moving on.

I am struggling to find any hope or positive thoughts that I will be a mum one day. With this recent loss I feel that this is only the beginning of the battle and I am scared of a future where I can't have kids.

I am also not sure if I can cope with any more heartache as I feel like this is consuming me.

I just want to be a mummy

X

[babyangelbean20315]

Keep ur head up never give up

Have they offered u anything to see if its a problem for u to have children or Isit all jus unexplanned ?

I've only had one and I feel terrible so I can only imagine how u must feel after 3 !

People have approached me since and told me so many stories of there losses and repeated losses but eventually there baby came

I hope urs does too xx

[dazedandconfused1981]

They have referred me for investigation but rather than that giving me hope I feel so overwhelmed that this pain is just the beginning.

I hope that day comes too, thank you for commenting

Best wishes for your journey

Xxx

[bakingtins]

dazed I'm v sorry you are going through a third loss. Please come and join the RMC thread (just about to start a new one) if you'd like some support. Most of us have found the testing process helpful in terms of a break for physical/emotional recovery and hopefully some answers and a plan to improve your chances.

[dazedandconfused1981]

Bakingtins I'll have a look for that thread and join.

Thank you, just feel all over the place just now. Don't know what to do one minute to the next

Xxx

[lorsa]

Hi dazed. Sorry you're going through this.

I had 3 losses in a row in 2012 which were similar to yours. I had a spontaneous miscarriage at 6.5 weeks a MMC at 11 weeks with baby measuring 8 weeks 5 and then an ectopic where they took out my left tube.

You may find they don't count the ectopic as a miscarriage in the sense you might not be referred to recurrent miscarriage unit as it needs to be three miscarriages in a row!

I did get a referral as my ectopic was missed and we complained through PALs so they tried to appease me. I had tests which were negative but even before my consultant said it was unlikely to be a problem as all three losses were different (like yours). I found the testing helpful as it felt that I was getting some control back.

My next pregnancy was successful, although nerve wracking.

It is a horrible horrible place where you are right now and I had some very dark thoughts when I was going through it.

Xxx

[marthabear]

I am so sorry that you are going through this. During 2007/2008 I had 4 miscarriages. All quite early between 5 and 8 weeks. After the third I had some testing done on the NHS but nothing was found. This gave me hope, but I then suffered a fourth loss not long afterwards. When I then got pregnant for the fifth time there seemed no cause for celebrating. I was fully expecting to lose the baby again. It was all such a difficult rollercoaster of experiences and I was already making alternative life plans in my head as I knew I could never face the rollercoaster of pregnancy again. But the pregnancy kept on going, early scans were okay, and I could relax a tiny bit when I made it to 12 weeks with a lovely heartbeat on scan. My little boy was born healthy at home in 2009 and has not long started school. I am very very blessed. It may well be a complete coincidence, but the only thing different about that fifth pregnancy was that I had sought help from a chinese herbalist before I got pregnant. I had a mixture of herbal teas and acupuncture up to around mid pregnancy. As I say, probably coincidence, although I did go back to the acupuncturist with my baby to tearfully thank him. I really feel for you Dazed and only you know how much more you can take, but there is hope.

[dazedandconfused1981]

Thank you lorsa and marthabear for taking the time to share your story with me.

I am so happy to hear that despite all the heartache you both came away with beautiful babies.

I feel like I'm driving myself crazy with the thoughts, if only we had an off switch huh?

I have considered acupuncture but I'll wait until the doctors do their tests and I pray that everything comes back ok from that.

Thanks for taking the time to comment, I appreciate it.

Xxx

[bakingtins]

Dazed I can't link from my iPad but we are just coming to the end of Recurrent Miscarriage Support thread 12 and will be onto thread 13 (chatty bunch) in the next few days. It's a rolling thread, newbies very welcome any time.

Please don't give up hope. There are lots of us who have been through the process, got some answers and help and gone on to have a baby. If you are in the 50% where NHS tests don't come up with an answer there is immune testing available privately or some women carry to term with non-specific support (e.g. Progesterone) and TLC. We've all had some pretty black moments and it helps to be able to talk to women who understand.

[dazedandconfused1981]

Thanks for that bakingtins.

I do need to get more clued up on what tests I should be ensuring I get, as I'm a tad clueless just now :(

I shall join that thread when it's up and running as it really is good to talk

Xxx

[toomuchtooold]

dazed so sorry for your losses, sounds like the RMC thread people will take care of you re advice on tests etc but just to say, if you get testing and something comes up, it's not the end of the world. I had 3mcs and then found out I have a chromosomal abnormality, one of the more complicated things to treat but with IVF and genetic screening I had two healthy girls in 2012. They're currently upstairs in the bath giving their dad a soaking :-)

I'd recommend Lesley Regan's book www.amazon.co.uk/Miscarriage-What-every-Woman-needs/dp/0752837575?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21 - she's the top recurrent miscarriage specialist in the UK (and not very nice, in my experience, but her clinic is very good which is the main thing). Her book summarises everything they currently test for in the UK.

I hope you find a bit of peace and a solution to this... it's bloody not easy I know.

[dazedandconfused1981]

Thanks toomuchtooold, I am currently purchasing the book you recommended. The reviews are very positive.

Thanks again for taking the time to comment

X

[dazedandconfused1981]

Just an update:

Was at hospital today and Midwife called back levels have fallen to 50 now so they don't need me to go back for scan. Just need more bloods on Monday to confirm they have fallen to zero. Referral for further investigation will take 8 weeks so enough time for my body to recover and hopefully I can now draw a line under this horrible experience.

Waiting on the book recommended above and I'll join the rmc thread to educate myself a bit more in the meantime.

Thanks again to everyone that has given advice and support

Xxx