How to send congratulations for second child after late miscarriage of first child

[Dowahdiddydiddydumdiddydo]

Throwing myself on the wisdom of MN, and this seemed the best place to ask advice.

A friend of mine had a miscarriage at about 33 weeks two years ago, a little boy. Absolutely devastating for her and her partner. She talks about him often, and he is very much an acknowledged part of life.

She gave birth today to a daughter, and I want to send her a card to say congratulations, and I would like to mention her son in the card. Do you think that would be okay? I don't want to not mention him because then I feel I'm glossing over his existence and treating her daughter like she is her first child.

Thoughts please?

I'm so sorry about your son, Babyh200, and thank you for adding your thoughts.

I haven't read the thread,sorry, but if you know the name of their first baby, I would use it. I wrote something like " A huge welcome to Mary and love to you all, and never forgetting her big brother John" in a card in similar circumstances.

And I wouldn't use rainbow or angel baby unless you are sure she uses the words herself. I know they are a comfort to many- but equally not to others.

Thanks Hakluyt. I do know the name of their first baby, so will use something like what you have put. I don't know if she uses rainbow or angel baby, so agree probably best to avoid in this instance.