What happens? Very early miscarriage

[BlinkAndMiss]

I'm not sure if this is actually classed as a miscarriage, I was due AF a few days ago (I think, irregular cycles), had familiar sicky feeling so took a test - positive. Then today I've started bleeding, heavily with clots just like my usual period. I have period pains and my 'pregnancy' feelings have completely gone (sore boobs, cramping and thirst). I know that it means my pregnancy has ended.

Am I supposed to do something? I've checked what my due date would have been and it calculated I was 5w and 3days, surely it just happens naturally because it's so early?

I have no idea about this, I guess I just thought it would never happen to me. Should I be thinking of this as a chemical or a miscarriage? The former sounds less scary and serious (I think I'm in denial).

TIA

I'm really sorry you've had to go through this. I'd suggest giving your GP OOH a call to get a referral to your nearest EPAC clinic as they may want to do some checks.

It is very early but it doesn't mean it isn't shit. When its happened to me in the past Ive found the Miscarriage Association very helpful both from an info and listening ear angle. Take care of yourself x

Sorry, I meant to add that it's also helpful to get this noted on your medical records - another reason to call OOH X

Thank you Flossie, I didn't really think of calling OOH. I'll give them a call tomorrow just to check that they don't need to see me, good idea about the medical records too. I haven't gone through anything like this before but perhaps it could be a sign of some difficulties ahead, I hope not but I think having as much information on my records might help if I need some sort of assistance with conceiving this time around.

I'm sorry that you've been through this too, it really is shit. Almost like you feel a bit of a fraud for being upset as there was nothing really there in the first place, but then like you don't want to ignore your emotions because what was there was your potential child. Just awful, but I know that there are far worse circumstances and I just want to move on.

I'm going to have a look at the Miscarriage Association, I do need to work through it all and get to the other side.

Thanks for making me feel better, I do appreciate it x

I made it to 4+5 days. I was told by NHS direct to go to A&E but all they did was a preg test which was negative.
We'd been trying over 6 months and it was our first preg. Those 5 days were the happiest of out lives and we've taken it really hard.
1 week later and the bleeding had stopped, I'm crying less and tonight I downed a bottle of red to forget last Friday when it happened
I think what I'm trying to say us that everyone is different. It might bother you less if you didn't know, or weren't planning it...or it might bother you more. There is no right or wrong answer

I keep thinking I'm being pathetic cos it was so early it's more like a late period. But we did get a bfp, in fact we got 2 of them and that gave us hope and now it's gone.
Too many people have said at least I know I can get preg, but it's no bloody good if I can't stay preg!

Oh purple I totally understand, I really do. You're not being pathetic, I thought I was too but after reading up I've realised that it is a kind of grieving process and you have to give yourself time to process what has happened. I know all too well that elated feeling of getting a BFP, it was a few really happy days for me too. I have a DS and I just want him to have a sibling, I thought I'd done this for him. And now I feel like I've let him down, and my DH. I know realistically that it's not my fault but I suppose I'm one of those people who need an answer for everything, this is one of those situations where there may never be an answer.

It's unhelpful when people say things like that, of course it's less complicated if you can actually conceive but that's not where the risks end as we know. I do wonder whether things would be better if I didn't know, but I think once I'm feeling less raw I'll be glad that I did know.

Once my bleeding stops I'll be hitting the wine too, I need some headspace and some relaxation. Thank you for your reply, it helps to know that others understand the way I'm feeling and I hope I can be of some support to you too. One thing that I've taken from this tonight is that if I can get this on my medical record then assistance will be quicker to obtain should I need it. I'm not sure if this was one of those things where the embryo wasn't going to be viable because of chromosome issues or whether it was something I did, or hormones or something. There are so many reasons, but if it's part of a bigger picture then it needs to be recorded so you should do the same.

I hope you feel better about things soon.

It doesn't matter how far along you are, it's still terrible. I miscarried in March (and again now), the March baby I'd never even done a pregnancy test. Doesn't matter - once I'd passed the first clots and then the little embryo I knew.

It will probably all happen naturally. If bleeding is bad, you feel unwell or the pain is too much for standard painkillers, it's an indication to seek help. and

I'm so sorry for your loss ChatEnOeuf, it really is terrible. I never thought I'd feel this sad over something I only knew about for a short time, the only time I've read the truth is on here - it's not like a 'heavy period' as most informative websites would have us believe. It's more like very mild labour pains, more blood and clots, which unless you're willing to ignore, are unmistakeable. I've had today to process things, I thought I could ignore it all but I think I need to work through it.

It seems to be happening naturally, it's painful but I've got painkillers and my DH is on hand if anything goes wrong (or more wrong). My test this morning was still positive, if you don't mind me asking how long did it take for your test to show negative again?

Thanks for your supportive reply, it really means a lot. This is such a lonely time, I hadn't told anyone we were trying and I don't want friends to know. Are you ok? Have you just miscarried recently too?

My test was negative by two weeks later, AF appeared about six weeks later.

Yes, I'm going through it all again. I was 6+ weeks with twins but they haven't made it. In hospital at the moment waiting for surgery as the scan looked like a molar pregnancy. Keep getting random waves of tears but time does heal. It did last time and will again, it just sucks right now

Chat and Blink, I hope it's all over soon and not too painful.
Natur took it's course with me over 5 days. I'm grateful that I didn't need any medical intervention. It could have been so much worse.

I bought a hibiscus shrub today and planted it in the garden to remember the bean that didn't stick

Oh Chat, I'm so sorry for your losses. I hope the surgery goes ok and that you are on the road to recovery soon. You sound so strong, I understand the random waves. It seems like part of the recovery process is just going with your emotions, however crazy they might be. It does really suck now, but we'll all get there. Purple that's such a lovely idea, a nice way to honour the little one who didn't make it. I've been thinking a lot about what I'm supposed to do next, it all seems so final and clinical in a way.

It's the thing no one talks about. I'm actually quite ashamed of how I viewed miscarriage before now, I've never been unsympathetic about it but I had no idea of how truly heartbreaking it actually is. But everyone on here has been so supportive and helpful. I'd like to think I can pass some of the lovely things on to anyone I know IRL who is unfortunate enough to go through this.

I'm ok really, I've been up and down all day. This morning I felt terrible and had lots of pain, I think I passed the main of everything earlier as things seem to have slowed a lot. I'm not cramping as much now either, so I hope it's all over. I did ring the OOH dr but they were dismissive, not completely unsympathetic but basically said that unless I was passing out or shaking there was nothing they could do. I'm planning to ring my GP in the morning so that it goes on my medical record. It's been the longest and most awful few days, coupled with the stress of the TWW in the first place - I want to tcc but I don't think I'm ready just yet.

I hope you are all ok, Chat please drop by and let us know how you're getting on. I'll be thinking of you all, thank you again for your kindness towards a stranger in need. I'll be here if any of you need a shoulder (or a chat on a thread!).