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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

The saddest thing my DD (3) had ever said...

12 replies

resipsa · 30/05/2014 23:04

She was an inadvertent witness to my 3rd m/c which happened with no warning a week ago. Today we were talking about babies generally and she said 'Mummy, that was going to be our baby, wasn't it, that red thing in the toilet. It died'
True but she's too young for thud sadness. Sorry this post has no pint but I had to let it out.

OP posts:
KnockMeDown · 30/05/2014 23:09

So sorry Sad

hugs

LettertoHerms · 30/05/2014 23:13

Oh goodness. I'm so sorry. Children are so much more perceptive and emotionally intelligent than we expect sometimes, it can be shocking and heartbreaking in these scenarios.

Thanks to you and your family.

Original poster
resipsa · 30/05/2014 23:14

She told me later today that she really wants a baby sister called Darcy. I just smiled (as I collapsed inside). Thanks for replying.

OP posts:
aloysiusflyte · 30/05/2014 23:28

My ds who is 3 was also witness to the miscarriage process as he came along with me and dh to what we thought would be a routine scan where a mmc was discovered. About a week afterwards he said to me 'there will be another baby, be happy mummy,' to which I battled back the tears and told him I hoped he was right.

The mmc was found a year ago today. 10 days ago I had a beautiful baby, I have felt sad today at times but it turned out my ds was right.

So sorry for your loss, it really is the most heartbreaking thing Thanks

Original poster
resipsa · 30/05/2014 23:32

Congrats!

OP posts:
MrsMaturin · 30/05/2014 23:32

Oh you poor thing :( Well done though for being honest with her. You can't protect them from every sadness but you can be honest and open with them. I'm sure your dd will get 'her' baby one day soon. In the mean time be kind to yourself.

Catlover2014 · 30/05/2014 23:52

Just wanted to say how sorry I am for the sadness and loss. You've all been through such a lot :(

That said I'm sure DD will be meeting her little brother or sister in the near future so hang in there and stay strong if you can.

Thinking of you xxx

Original poster
resipsa · 30/05/2014 23:59

Cat - thanks - I've seen your posts elsewhere and feel for you too BUT I have to add that I've been pregnant at 39, 40, 41 and 43 so time is by no means running out for you.

OP posts:
Rejjie · 31/05/2014 11:19

Thanks for this last post resipa.

At the age of 41 and having just miscarried my first child this week, it sends a little ray of hope.

x

Catlover2014 · 31/05/2014 23:09

Gives me hope to hear that. I'm trying so hard to be positive. Let's hope that all our next BFPs have sticky beans. Xxx

Tassel · 01/06/2014 14:34

How do you stay positive when it feels so hopeless. I have just had my 4th miscarriage in 18 months, the latest after ivf and I'm 41 in 2 weeks. I just feel absolute despair as I watched my daughter on the beach yesterday walking up to talk to other children and no one wanted to play with her because they all had brothers and sisters of their own to play with. I read other peoples good luck story and I know I have to be the bad story; the ying for the yang because not all the stories can end well. Sorry i am dampening the mood but I have a great deal of bitterness

Original poster
resipsa · 01/06/2014 16:22

Tassel - you and me both. My IVF failures (two 6 week m/cs, the last just 10 days ago after seeing a heartbeat Sad) were with donor eggs so I have tried everything and we've spent £18,000 for no gain. I feel that my happiness will forever be blunted by this secondary infertility. I hope that I'm wrong.

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