Pregnancy loss at 3/4 weeks

[Vatta]

Had a BFP, and started bleeding the day after. Had a few days of bleeding and clots that seems to be stopping now, and now my tests show negative.

The pregnancy was definitely early stages, I was only 3 and a half weeks along.

I feel so sad. But also a bit stupid for being sad, it was so early. I suppose if I hadn't tested I wouldn't have known anything, I just would have thought my period this month was odd.

Just wondering what anybody else thinks about pregnancy loss when it happens this early. How do people cope with this/how upset is "ok" to feel? I'm not as upset as when I lost a baby at 12 weeks earlier this year, but I am upset.

Hi Vatta
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I miscarried in July also in the early stages.
You are not stupid for feeling sad, you lost your baby and with it all your hopes & dreams that go along with the expectation of new baby. There's no right or wrong way to how you feel, its very personal.
I still have good & bad days but I'll always remember & never forget the lost one.

Thank you for the reply. I feel so sad, but just don't know how to process this. It's not something people really talks about in RL.

I'm sorry for your loss also. I know what you mean about good days and bad days, I'm still that way about my first miscarriage. Seems to get overall gradually easier, but there's still days and moments where it's very tough.

Hi Vatta I'm sorry you lost your baby. I think for most people a line on a test means a baby, with all the hopes and expectations that go along with that, so a loss however early can be a very sad experience. I think it probably is worse the later on in pregnancy a loss happens, a late miscarriage or a stillbirth must be worse than the first trimester losses that I've suffered, but that doesn't negate your feelings about your own situation.

Thank you bakingtins that's a good way of explaining it actually. As soon as I see the BFP I feel like there's a baby on the way, even though obv I know it could go wrong.

Sorry about your loss, Vatta. Hope you are feeling better, soon.
I had a mc in July and it was quite a prolonged process, which left me more fed up than anything. It's horrible not to be one of the "lucky" ones, who get their BFP and a few months later get to hold their baby in their arms.
What's got me through is the fact that it was so early on. I think anything later would have upset me a lot more. (One of my colleagues only found out at their 12-week scan, which must be devastating.) However, I now refuse to test before I get to at least 6 weeks. Last time I knew I was pregnant when I was only 4 weeks along. My last af was late,...5 days late. I suspect that it might have been another early mc, but I don't know for certain. It could have just been that my cycles are starting to readjust properly and getting back to their pre-mc length.
Ignorance is bliss...at least a little.