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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Miscarriage started, what should do.....stay home or go to the hospital??

28 replies

DitsyDonkey · 19/11/2013 23:44

So after three to four days of spotting I am starting to bleed bright red fresh blood and large clots. I'm only experiencing AF type cramps so far.

I was in the hospital Saturday and Monday and had scans which he baby was only measuring six weeks (I'm 8) and no heart beat. So I don't really want to go back not th hospital as I think it is pretty obvious what is happening and don't need another scan.

But I am frightened that it is going to get unbearably painful as I'm not good with pain and only have paracetamol and can't get anything else now as its late and I'm in rural Ireland.

The gp and hospital told me to go in immediately if I got heavy bleeding and or cramps, but I don't want to!

Advice please. What should I do also how long until the pain gets really bad. How long after heavy bleeding starts will sac pass, is this really painful? Sad

OP posts:
missmakesstuff · 19/11/2013 23:50

Hi, I don't have much practical advice but didn't want to leave you unanswered.

I am so sorry for what is happening, it must feel very scary. Is there anyone with you? anyone you can call if not?

I had a MC at 6-7 weeks, it was over in a few days and was like a heavy period, cramps, but not unbearable. I couldn't get to the hospital till the Monday and knew what was happening so just let it take it's course. I didn't see or feel anything pass. I would just suggest taking some painkillers, get hot water bottle or anything else that eases the cramps, and definitely go to hospital if it does feel unbearable, there is no reason to suffer and it is probably best to make sure everything is progressing as it should. Having said that, at this time of night you might be more comfortable at home.

I hope it is over quickly for you and you are able to get some support.

missmakesstuff · 19/11/2013 23:52

Sorry, just also wanted to say that I was able to walk about, be fairly normal in the few days it took. But not saying you should - everyone is different. I had family staying who didn't know I was pregnant and we didn't tell them, so I had to just carry on. However, I did just sleep for a day or two after, plus got myself some floradix (iron) to help afterwards. Lots of rest if you can and whatever painkillers you need. Probably not recomended but also Wine helped me to numb it a bit for the first few days.

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 19/11/2013 23:54

Thank you so much for your reply. Yes my mother is after bringing me over to her house as dh is on night shifts. Also it is nearer the hospital.

I feel that I would prefer to let nature take its course. I'm just such a wuss with pain. I don't mind the blood so much....not that it is great either iykwim?!

OP posts:
3girlsunder3 · 19/11/2013 23:57

Hi I'm so sorry you're going through this. I can only give you my own experience, I miscarried at around 10 weeks last year. The pain was like really bad period pain - it's basically contractions, and for me was bearable with paracetamol & ibuprofen. The really bad pain lasted a day & then I passed the sac which was white.

Please look after yourself and go to the hospital if you feel you need to, trust your instincts. You will need to be scanned at some point too,just to check.

Sending you hugs x

missmakesstuff · 19/11/2013 23:59

Just don't look - I didn't, closed my eyes when using the loo etc. Good that you have your mum to sit with you. See if you can get hold of a hot water bottle, get tucked up in bed and try to sleep. I honestly don't know what the hospital would do at this stage anyway, as long as they are sure that it isn't ectopic and you get scanned when you next can to be sure everything has passed then you are probably better off at home.

I am rubbish with pain and it really wasn't that bad, physically at least. Look after yourself mentally though, it can really hit you when everything is done, it doesn't matter how early on you were or how you think you should feel, it is still a loss.

Hope everything works out ok for you, take care.

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 20/11/2013 00:01

Was it really painful when you passed the sac? Sad

I have a scan booked anyway for Monday.

It is horrible isn't it. I never thought it would happen me....I guess we all think this. After 2.7 years ttc I thought this was it! Sad

OP posts:
3girlsunder3 · 20/11/2013 00:19

No the sac passing didn't hurt more or feel different, it was just there on wiping, with the blood.

So sorry, hope you manage to get some support from your mum, and some rest.

Take care.

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 20/11/2013 05:45

I'm so worried I have not slept at all. It seems to have subsided and since midnight no cramps, no clots and only blood when I wipe but t s still bight red.

I'm afraid to keep as I think I'm going to wake up on agony, I know logically if its going to get painful it will regardless of whether I sleep or not!

Is this normal for the bleeding to abate? I can't hardly be finished the worst yet.....with just two gushes and two clots the size of prunes and looked like bits of liver?

Sorry fr being do needy, I'm just scared Blush

OP posts:
RacquelWelsh · 20/11/2013 06:46

Hi Ditsy

I've messaged you privately but in case you don't get that, here's a Mumsnet thread that I found really helpful

Mumsnet Tips for coping with miscarriage

So sorry to hear you're going through this, it's quite understandable to be scared, you're not being needy...

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 20/11/2013 07:43

Thank you Racquel! I will have a look now, it will give me something to do since I can't sleep.

I'm thinking of phoning the early preg unit at 9 as they told me to come back in if bleeding increased. I think I need a scan just to help me accept. Also I need to get a sick cert as I can't possibly go to work?!

OP posts:
RacquelWelsh · 20/11/2013 08:28

Definitely understand needing a scan to help you accept, it's hard to get your head around but was a necessary step for me.

Good idea to phone early preg unit and ABSOLUTELY DON'T GO TO WORK!!!! Best thing to do is stay home, keep warm and take care of yourself (or better still get someone else to take care of you). Do what you find comforting. I stayed in bed with a trashy novel and a massive bar of chocolate ...

You may be able to get a sick certificate issued by ringing your Doctor?

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 20/11/2013 08:35

I was down with my gp yesterday he was very understanding as he has seen us through 2.7 yrs ttc. I was getting my blood drawn for hcg levels. I didn't get a sick cert yesterday as it was just spotting and I don't work Tuesdays anyway so hopefully I will get it over phone as I can afford another €50 today!

OP posts:
worsestershiresauce · 20/11/2013 08:37

I'm so sorry. Physical aspects aside my GP told me not to underestimate the effect of the hormonal come down after a miscarriage. Talk to people, ask for help, you don't have to manage all by yourself.

I second the advice don't go to work. Look after yourself.

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 20/11/2013 08:53

I'm definitely not going not work. I thought it was nearly finished naively but I am starting to feel pain starting up, it's already worse than last night. But not really bleeding much.

OP posts:
RacquelWelsh · 20/11/2013 08:57

Agree with worsetershiresauce re hormonal come down. Glad you're not going to work.

I dosed up on ibruprofen and found a hot water bottle on my stomach helped too. Do call the EPU if you need to, they're well used to talking to women in your situation.

Will be thinking of you today.

3girlsunder3 · 20/11/2013 09:22

No the sac passing didn't hurt more or feel different, it was just there on wiping, with the blood.

So sorry, hope you manage to get some support from your mum, and some rest.

Take care.

lighthousesea · 20/11/2013 21:16

You poor thing. I had heavy period type bleeding for
3 weeks before my ERPC. It's so draining, especially when the misc doesn't happen naturally.

Re working - really take your time. Look after yourself and don't feel under any pressure to go back straight away. I took 5 weeks off in the end.

Sending you hugs

Bakingtins · 21/11/2013 07:27

Ditsy I am so sorry that you are losing your baby. How are you coping today? Flowers

tracypenisbeaker · 21/11/2013 07:34

So sorry ditzy, I remembered your other thread and I had my fingers crossed for you. Be nice to yourself x

Original poster
DitsyDonkey · 21/11/2013 12:24

Hi everyone, well I had a scan today at EPU and miscarriage was confirmed Sad baby is gone, I didn't actually notice the sac passing, though I did get a huge clot the size of my hand, which must have been it.

I have a week off work. I have another scan next week as I still have some bits left inside.

She gave me a prescription for progesterone supplements that I'm to start using te second I become pregnant again. Though at the moment I can't imagine that ever happening.

In the end it was not painful, a few cramps but not at all bad!

So right now I feel, exhausted, sad and empty.

Thank you so much for your support x

OP posts:
squizita · 21/11/2013 12:42

So sorry for your loss. Do ensure you are 'followed up' correctly. I've found that sometimes the EPU can become disjointed in its support a few weeks later - when if there are any hormone issues etc' they need to check. But your EPU sounds good.

RacquelWelsh · 21/11/2013 19:36

Sad so sorry to hear this Ditsy. Look after yourself X

ZenOfPetals · 22/11/2013 18:20

I hope you are feeling better

Lottystar · 23/11/2013 20:54

Oh Ditsy! I cried when I read this. I can't believe both of us have miscarried when we found out we were pregnant the same time. It utterly sucks. I hope you're as okay as can be expected at the mo. Sending you all my love - pls get in touch if you want to chat xxx

Moreta2k2 · 09/09/2018 16:31

Hello all.
I went for early scan on wed 5th and could only see gestation sac . It measured 6wks 6days. My dates were 9 wks 6days. The Dr said nothing to me and kind of left me with more questions than I went in with. The day after I started spotting. Well that answered my question! I started to bleed quite heavily yesterday and passed what looked like a chicken liver.( sorry) would you say that was it? I still have pain and using hot water bottle. Ibuprophen .paracetamol and jumping in and out of hot baths. Should I go to the hospital as im not sure this is over. I just want to get back to normal. Feel like a complete wally having to go back to work not pregnant anymore.

Xxx