2nd mc in 3 months...Need to vent!

[Ruggle]

So I have miscarried today at 5+2 after a week of faint but definite positives and a "1-2" on cbdigi....
It's just over 3 months since my mmc at 11+4.
I am now assuming that if I try again it will only end the same way. I am 39 in a month's time. Am I too old to be offered testing if I do have this happen a third time? I don't know if there is an age limit.
Has anyone had two mcs close together and gone on to have a succesful third attempt?
Should I wait a while longer before trying again?
My grandmother had her first and only child at age 42 with no problems that I know of...but I do somewhat feel like my age might have something to do with it.
I know the medics say it is most likely random chromosomal issues and nothing to blame myself for....but a day or two before finding out I was pregnant this time I had spent a day cleaning our old flat with bleach spray and hoovering...and ended up with quite bad asthma....and I can't help but think it may have caused this to happen.
I guess I'm just hoping for some words of encouragement. My partner seemed quite supportive this morning until he came out with "You're lucky. It's happened so early that it's just a period...not a miscarriage."....which made me realise he can't possibly understand the attachment a woman feels to the potential little person in their tummy...even if it's only the size of a poppy seed.

Hi Ruggle, sorry to hear about what you are going through, miscarriage is horrible. If you have a third one, they will do tests it doesn't matter that you are 39. It wasn't your fault it happened but I know how all to easy it is to blame yourself.

I think that you don't have to wait too long from a physical point of view before trying again. I found with me I needed a bit more time to deal with it mentally.

Your partner was just trying to make you feel better, they just have a strange way of doing it. My DH was a bit like that, but he was upset too and I don't think he knew what else he could say. I'm with you though you do form an attachment you can't help it. You need to give yourself time to grieve, it's not something you just 'get over', it just becomes easier to live with.

I hope it is third time lucky for you.

Ruggle I'm v sorry. 2nd miscarriage (I've had 4) is particularly shitty. Very hard to swallow the "unlucky" line, but not yet taken seriously as a recurrent miscarrier. You should still qualify for testing if you do go on to have a 3rd. Chromosome problems do become more common as you get older, but you need to be well over 40 before you hit a 50% MC rate.
As the doctors will tell you, I'm sure nothing you did caused this. How soon you try again depends on when you feel strong enough. I think a bit of a break focussing on getting healthy can help, but you need to balance that against the ticking clock. This summer we had a break from TTC whilst our tests were completed and I did C25K to get fitter.
Happy to advise about testing on the RMC thread if you want to join us.

I'm sorry you've had another MC.

There's no physical reason for you not to start trying again as soon as you feel ready. I've recently started trying again after my second MC. I waited until after I'd had an AF as the last thing I want having had two MMC's is any confusion re dates but many people don't wait for that.