Another punch in the gut ... :-(

[icklemssunshine1]

Today I found out another friend is pg - that's the 4th since my ERPC in February. Each time I hear of a pg I feel so sick yet I have to smile & fake being excited as I don't want to dampen their happy time. Some of you may remember I found out a friend was expecting twins 2 days after my MMC & due 10 days after my EDD, I have to watch her every day (we work together) getting bigger & bigger. She's finding out the sexes tomorrow & I know that'll hurt too. Family & friends said I would fall pg quickly but I can't TTC as it was discovered after my MC that I have 2 slipped discs & any pregnancy can cause damage to my spine. I'm now waiting for steroid injections & maybe surgery.

Don't know why I'm posting really, think I just wanted to vent. People IRL (including DH) think im over it, after all it was a few months ago, but sometimes I feel so sad :(

I think it's normal to feel sad no matter how long ago the MC was, at least I hope it's normal because I still feel very sad too (I had an ERPC on 18th March). I'm sorry to hear about the slipped discs in your back and I hope you get the help you need with that as soon as possible. Big hugs xxxxx

Thanks for your reply. Sorry for your loss also. Most days I feel "okay" & sometimes I don't think about the MC at all but when I see a pregnant woman or hear of a pregnancy I just want to cry. I've even stopped buying my trashy magazines as I can't bare to read about the next celebrity baby - how pathetic is that?!!

It's not pathetic, it's totally totally understandable. MC isn't something that you can always "get over" with time. But if you are finding it hard, maybe you should go back to your GP and ask about counselling?

Or can you put some more efforts into sorting out your back so you can get going on ttc-ing sooner? Would following up with your GP on this help to push things along? Can you afford to get a private referral?

It's not pathetic at all, I don't think you ever totally get over a miscarriage but learn to live with it. Even a few years down the line it can hit you when you least expect it. When you have had one you also become super sensitive of pregnant women and seem to be surrounded by them wherever you look which just makes you feel worse, then you feel guilty for feeling jealous but you can't help it. I really hope you get your back sorted out soon and wish you the best of luck.