So, that's that then...

[Snoopingforsoup]

Just thoughts now the physical is nearly over:
My MMC was a shock.
My choice of natural management was due to me being a coward.
The worst is over, the scan on Friday said the majority of 'products' had passed but I was told I would bleed for a while and there was a bit more to come.
I just don't know what to think. I feel numb. I've had a really good wail on several occasions and now I just feel odd, like this never really happened. Yet the agony and the emotion knows that it definitely did happen.
I've been able to smile at newborns, I've felt joy at little toddlers being cute...I'm just sad for the child that didn't get here.

And that was my last chance, I feel too worn out to do any of this again. I hope that people will stop stigmatising only children for the sake of DS and I'm so happy to have him.
Life goes on.
Thanks to all those who have posted on this forum. Your help through this was so invaluable. Just reading old threads along with the new advice and people who responded to my thread, I'll always be grateful.

That's really sad and difficult for you.

Your stoicism in the face of such personal tragedy is admirable. Shows true strength of character.

My experience is it comes in waves, Snoop I have times of feeling really emotionally numb about it, then days where I am sad again.
We're here if you feel at any time you need to come back and vent. Hope moving on gives you some peace about it all.

thanks both
I feel about as strong as a chocolate teapot right now.
Blummin' miserable. And I'm sick of people expecting me to be 'normal' and to socialise etc.
I'm being pretty anti-social and can't bring myself to tell most people what's been happening. It seems selfish when I have close friends with racked up IVF attempts and I have a gorgeous DC so I'm just hiding out for a while. School run and family essentials only.
A bit of spring sunshine would probably help lift the spirits a bit. We can but hope...