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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Hello

79 replies

PseudoBadger · 02/12/2012 09:25

Hello everyone. Had my first miscarriage on Friday/Saturday at 12 weeks. I don't really want to go into details but most of it happened in A&E, then I was admitted to the Gynae ward until yesterday afternoon.
When I woke up this morning I just feel weak and tired from my shoulders to my knees :(

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BridgetandtheHairyBaubles · 12/12/2012 18:24

Gosh, you really are being put through the mill. I imagine you are utterly emotionally exhausted. Have been asked to go back for a final scan to check that everything has returned to normal?

Welovecouscous · 12/12/2012 18:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 12/12/2012 19:29

No Bridget, I've been sent away with nothing. I was meant to go back tonight to get some antibiotics from the ward, but I couldn't breastfeed with them. So I just rang and asked for a different one, and I have to get amoxicillin from my GP tomorrow.

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YouSeveredHead · 12/12/2012 19:45

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this.

My own experience can be summed up in the following;1) began bleeding 2) became clear I was no longer pg 3) epu advised me over the phone to see my gp 4) gp advises he will refer me for a scan to check its all gone, takes bloods 5) a few weeks later attend scan

Yes that is it. No leaflets, just advised to take pain relief as required. The only exam was the scan which was weeks later.

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 12/12/2012 19:51

I'm sorry for your experience too SeveredHead :(

You know, I didn't even notice that I hadn't received leaflets/advice until I got some yesterday!

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Geekster · 12/12/2012 21:08

Sorry for your experience PseudoBadger. There is really no excuse for the way you have been treated. To leave you in limbo this long is disgusting. You would think they would treat you better, after all you have sufferd a big loss and are in grief and its a bereavement like any other. I'm cross on your behalf. Make sure you do complain.

I hope you feel better soon, look after each other.

Take care.

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 12/12/2012 21:25

Thank you again Geekster Flowers

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ipswichwitch · 12/12/2012 21:26

Jesus you've had some pretty shocking treatment (all of you).
I had a mmc last month. Ended up having medical management (tablets) and was admitted to the gynae ward while I had them. First lot didn't work, then as we were discussing erpc with the consultant, the second lot kicked in and everything came out. I did get some support and info (and plenty pain relief offered), and while I feel better looked after than you've been it was still lacking.

I would definitely complain about a&e, and I think it's bloody horrendous that women in our situation have to share a waiting room for the scan with pregnant women (something I will be writing to the hospital about)

Take as long as you need off work. I had 3 weeks in the end as I just wasn't up to it physically or emotionally. I had extreme tiredness for at least 2 weeks. Be kind to yourself- everything you've been feeling (your DP included) is normal, and it may take time before you start feeling like yourself again. Look after each other, and we're all here anytime you need to talk/vent

literaryone · 13/12/2012 10:17

Oh, PseudoBadger, that's incredibly stupid and thoughtless of them! I'm so sorry this has been one healthcare fiasco after another for you.

I wish they'd done a scan at the very least. Definitely do complain.

Thinking of you and hoping the pain is a bit better at least. xox

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 13/12/2012 19:16

Thank you again, much less pain today although a little tonight so who knows if more is coming? I saw the GP today to get antibiotics and she was shocked at what's happened, and told me to ring the EPU for a furthe scan.
So I rang the EPU and they were also shocked (everyone's shocked :o) that the erpc was cancelled and I think were quite annoyed that their medical judgement had been overruled. I may have started a departmental war....
I have a scan next Tuesday.

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Original poster
PseudoBadger · 13/12/2012 19:17

Oh and the gp signed me off until after Christmas, so that's a relief.

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Geekster · 13/12/2012 22:06

Good I'm glad you got signed off work. Sounds like you have a good GP. Good for you for starting a departmental war at the hospital. Maybe something will get done about the shoddy treatment you have received, and someone will get their but kicked. I really hope you finally get some answers next Tuesday.

Take care.

BoyMeetsWorld · 15/12/2012 07:48

Wow pseudo what a nightmare...I hope it's all over soon for you and you can 'enjoy' Christmas as much as possible. I think you've posted on one of my other panicking threads - expecting to have to go through all this imminently - and wanted to show some support. It's very interesting that the surgeon who cancelled your op (right or wrong) felt the risks of it outweighed getting everything finished. Everybody always plays down the risks & looks at the fact that - statistically - its very safe. But having worked closely with surgeons, I think they generally know best about it....& if we're talking statistics, all of us are 'statistically' unlucky to have been through this, some more than once. It does make me more wary of ERPC although the natural option terrifies me, particularly reading stories like yours. Take care of yourself - it sounds like you have a lovely DH, dogs and DS to help heal the pain slowly xx

BoyMeetsWorld · 15/12/2012 07:52

Also out of interest - has the doc that signed you off stated the real reason, so you're forced to declare it to work by getting signed off?

BoyMeetsWorld · 15/12/2012 07:52

Also out of interest - has the doc that signed you off stated the real reason, so you're forced to declare it to work by getting signed off?

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 16/12/2012 13:49

Hi Boy, thanks for posting. I had already told my boss so that's not a problem, but the doctor was happy to write something else if it was an issue :)

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Original poster
PseudoBadger · 16/12/2012 13:49

That sounds dodgy! I guess she would have just phrased it differently, not made up a different reason for being off :o

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Original poster
PseudoBadger · 18/12/2012 11:54

Well I can't actually believe it, but the saga continues. Went for a scan today, there's still retained products so I've been booked AGAIN for an erpc on Thursday. My notes have written 'do not cancel' all over them! The doctor is furious that this wasn't done last week.
I'm feeling so down and fed up with this :( had a little cry in the supermarket at a couple of tiny babies - not like me at all! I'm really at the end of my tether emotionally I think :(

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spiderlight · 18/12/2012 12:03

Oh Pseudobadger - so sorry. I remember you from the June thread and I can't believe the way you've been treated :( So, so angry and sad for you. I went through the worst of mine yesterday and I'm glad i stuck to my guns and stayed at home now, horrific though it was - if I'd had the same treatment as you in A&E I don't know what I would have done. It really is unforgiveable the way you've been messed around. You probably don't want to think about it at this stage but you might want to have a chat with PALS about your experience when you're feeling stronger. Thinking of you Thanks

Geekster · 18/12/2012 18:41

Sorry to hear that PseudoBadger. If they had just got on with it last week it would have been sorted by now. You must be so fed up. I'm not surprised you are at the end of your emotional tether. Miscarriage is bad enough without all the shoddy treatment you have had, you have been messed around so much. I really hope you finally get sorted out on Thursday. Just refuse to leave the hospital until you do. Not surprised you had a little cry. Have a big one it might help you to feel better. You are a strong woman to have kept going through all this. Be kind to yourself.

Take care.

Welovecouscous · 18/12/2012 20:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 19/12/2012 11:26

Thank you all. I will absolutely not be leaving the hospital without having t done! But I am really scared now about getting a cannula put in as it was such a nightmare last week :(
On the bright side, we are off for lunch to a Michelin star restaurant today!

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Welovecouscous · 19/12/2012 11:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Geekster · 19/12/2012 12:47

Shouldn't worry about the cannula too much, you may have got someone last time who couldn't get it in easily. They will get one in.

Enjoy your lunch today.

Original poster
PseudoBadger · 20/12/2012 19:26

Well it's all done. True to form my hospital made sure there was a sting in the tail for me, which was putting me on the morning list (nil by mouth from midnight) but then doing the op during the afternoon list (1 pm!).
Since it was my 3rd NBM of over 12 hours in 3 weeks I was rather pissed off :o Why aren't I thinner by now?!
The doctor said that there was lots of product left, more than indicates by the scan, so they were pleased to have done the erpc.
Hopefully I can now move on, and begin my extensive complaint letter :o

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