miscarriage and unsure about all stuff?

[mumtoaandj]

i am currently going through an early miscarriage- not sure of the dates. miscarriage started last thursday and i was in hospital until sunday, i have had no bleeding but scan detected nothing/no baby nothing. my hcg levels are falling from 482 now to 163? no idea what that means. i still have had no bleeding. my last period was 25th august---could that have been a miscarriage then ? my periods in july and august were really fleshy and heavy but i felt really well over summer and did gain weight whilst trying to diet. i look at photos of me now and realise that i looked pregnant.
i now feel empty, tired and dizzy- still no bleeding. will i bleed? i had a very sharp shooting pain yesterday near my belly button area.
i am blessed to have 2 lovely children already and this pregnancy was unknown. when can i begin the mini pill again..not that i feel well enough to do anything like that.....will i always grieve the baby? should i fill the gap by TTC again?

[messtins]

Hi mumtoaandj - I'm sorry you are going through this. I'm not clear from your post what took you to hospital in the first place if you were not bleeding. It sounds like there is no viable pregnancy on a scan but either you haven't actually started to miscarry yet or it happened in late August and is now complete. I think you need to go back to the hospital and ask for clarification on what was seen on the scan and whether there is more to come, they should have information on the thickness of your womb lining and if there was any other tissue in there. The HCG is the pregnancy hormones and should be increasing as the pregnancy progresses, if they are falling it means the pregnancy has failed and there will be a cut off where your body recognises that and starts to bleed. From what others have said the levels need to fall quite low before that happens, but equally it can take a while for levels to fall after the miscarriage has been completed.
Did you have bloods done in hospital? The "tired and dizzy" makes me think you may be anaemic after your heavy periods. They will probably have checked your haemoglobin levels but you might have to chase them to find out if it's low. An iron supplement (I like Spatone) and taking it easy will help.
I've had 2 first trimester miscarriages, one in 2009 and one a week ago. It does get easier with time, I don't think you ever do "get over it" completely, but certainly it becomes less raw and all-consuming. I think whether you TTC depends on whether you were plannning to have another child or not. I certainly felt I needed to "put things right" by carrying a healthy baby, but both of the babies I've lost had been planned so we'd made the decision we wanted another child already. If you are not sure give yourself some time and then see how you feel.
Get on the phone to the hospital and ask for some clarification. It's hard to make sense of it all when you are in shock and upset. You need to be clear what has happened and what you expect over the next days/weeks.
Gentle un-MN-ty hugs. Jen x

[mumtoaandj]

Thank you for the reply. i ended up in hospital because i was in a lot of pain and they thought it might be ectopic they also queried appendicitis.

[messtins]

All the more reason to get some clarification. If you actually miscarried end of August you shouldn't be in pain now. If you had a normal period then you could only be very early pregnant now, I would think too early for an ectopic to cause problems. It doesn't really make complete sense so I'd be on the phone wanting to know what they think has happened.
How do you feel now? Has the pain subsided?

[galwaygal]

So sorry to hear of the loss of your pregnacy and baby.

In answer to your lack of bleeding question: It could be your body is reabsorbing the pregnancy. I had one miscarriage like this, pregnancy was seen on scan and seen to get smaller a week later with falling hcg levels, but I did not bleed after the second scan for a month, once my hcg levels reached zero again, I had my normal monthly bleed. For me it was more traumatic not having the physical miscarriage to grieve for the loss of the baby.

It could also be that you had already lost the pregnancy in August, and that you have little left to lose (did they say if the scan showed thickened uterine lining or if it was normal size?)

HOWEVER - ectopic pregnancies can have fluctuating low hcg levels. Please if you have further pain (including shoulder pain), do not hesitate going to the hospital to be rescanned in case they have missed spotting an ectopic pregnacy.

As for grieving, you will need to greive in whatever way you feel best for you. Some things that sometimes help are, naming the baby lost, planting a plant/flower in their memory, or buying a little keepsake.

TTC will not help with the grief in the long-term, but losing a baby does make many women (including me) want to be pregnant again as soon as possible. Take a couple of weeks before making such a decision, as hormones are running wild just after a miscarriage.

Sorry again that you are going through this tough time.

[mumtoaandj]

thank you- i have started to bleed slightly very dark and streaky. my tummy does not hurt as much now but i get waking in the night with cramp like pains. i dont know what is/was happening to my body..all my past 3 periods have been on time so this was a shocker. i had a transvag? ultrasound scan and no pregnancy was seen- there was a cyst on my right ovary and some pools of blood somewhere ,,,i didnt know what to ask or look for at the time. i rand the hospital and they are "happy" wiht my progress! i am booking a doctors appointment on monday.
Thankfully i do feel better today, maybe i have been waiting for a bleed?
i am very very tired though
thank you

[messtins]

Thinking of you. Hope you are feeling ok and that you get some more information on Monday. Take it easy. Are you taking any iron supplements? If you've had several heavy periods and then a bleed now you may well be a bit anaemic. Make sure you are looked after and you eat well and take it easy until you feel stronger. Jen x