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Should I still have any hope?

16 replies

leeloo1 · 29/07/2012 09:10

My lmp was 30th May (which made me 8+1 on Weds), but I ovulate late in the month (between cd 18-20, so I think I'd be about 7wks by that calculation).

I had a scan on Wednesday, after I had a bit of spotting (5-6 drops). I've also had lots of cramping and lower back pain, like a period, but I've had that throughout the pregnancy. It was a private scan, but I was lucky as it was done by a senior consultant from the local hospital. I have a retroverted/tilted uterus - if that makes a difference, and he did an internal scan after the normal one to see if he could see anymore - but he said he couldn't.

He said it wasn't good news - that the sac was a good shape but was measuring about 6.1wks and the foetal pole was 3.75 (ext scan)-4mm (int scan), which is about 5.75-6wks but there was no heartbeat.

He advised that the medical definition of non-viable is if it was 6mm with no heartbeat, but that with advances in scanner technology they should be able to see a heartbeat at 4mm. He also said that nowadays you could often see a heartbeat before you saw a foetal pole. I'm also obv small for my dates.

His advice was to wait for 7-10 days then be rescanned, but that it was a very slim chance that things would have changed. But despite his words of caution I can't stop my hopes being raised... that perhaps its just the dates and I'm not as far along because of late ovulation and it'll all be ok.

Realistically though... the late ov only makes me 1wk out and the measurements make me 2wks out, so I shouldn't be optimistic should I? :(

Sorry long post, but any advice would be appreciated - I'm torn between being devastated (it took 1.5yrs to conceive this baby) and feeling that everything will be fine.

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Lolcbcb · 29/07/2012 09:19

Oh hun what a crap situation to be in!
I don't know much about measurements etc as I was only pg once and unfortunately I mc'd just over a week ago.
My best advice is a bit cliche- expect the worst but hope for the best.
I would personally not wait 10 days.
I would go to gp and see if u can be referred for early scan at EPU. Maybe don't even tell them about the scan u had and see what they say!
Good luck and keep us posted x

LittleMissSnowShine · 29/07/2012 10:35

So sorry leeloo :(

Im in similarish situation - had an early scan at 7 weeks and.saw heartbeat but baby was measuring smallish for dates. Had a bit of spotting, nothing heavy, and then had my booking scan last week. They couldnt find heartbeat and it seemed that the baby had stopped growing. Like you, i hav to wait and go back to early preg.clinic - my appt is tomorrow morning.

I havent had any more bleeding or cramping but I have to say I dont really have a lot of hope, its just too painful for me to hope for a heartbeat tomorrow.

But thats not to say you should give up yet, you just have to follow hospital's advice and wait and see. Fx for you and if things dont work out this time I hope you can get closure and have better luck next time x

leeloo1 · 29/07/2012 18:19

Thanks for the sympathy and I'm so sorry both of you are going through the same thing. :(

I guess it is just a case of wait and see... but waiting is so damn hard when I still feel pregnant but keep having to remind myself I'm probably not. :(

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leeloo1 · 29/07/2012 18:20

Sorry LittleMissSnowShine - forgot to say, I'll keep my fingers crossed that you have good news at the scan tmrw.

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willitbe · 29/07/2012 23:09

The waiting is horrible. I have been in that situation a few times myself, and mostly it ends badly, but with one of my pregnancies, I had scan at 7w3d and was told game over, as it was measuring only around 5 weeks and no h/b or even yolk seen. But 11 days later, there was baby as perfect as can be, correct for dates etc. I have since been told I have a tilted uterus (very common in women) and this makes me measure 2 weeks behind with early scans. However to balance this, I have also had many pregnancies where I have measured behind dates and ended up miscarrying. I am sorry that so many women have to live in limbo land waiting to find out, but it is only with time that it can be confirmed whether it is an inevitable m/c or not.

I hope that you manage to distract yourself until the next scan, it is a difficult time.

leeloo1 · 30/07/2012 07:43

Thanks willitbe. I didn't know that the tilted uterus could make you measure smaller in early scans. Was that with an internal or external scan (if you don't mind my asking)?

I really, really wish I hadn't gone for the scan as I still feel pregnant (and have worse morning sickness today than ever) and if I hadn't been scanned I'd be thinking 'hurray the bleeding was only a teeny bit and its all stopped' and think everything was fine. As it is I'm stuck in this miserable limbo. :(

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Lolcbcb · 30/07/2012 08:57

When is your scan leelo???
Try to keep same in the meantime Blush x

LittleMissSnowShine · 30/07/2012 17:48

It was bad news for me leeloo but i really hope you get a better result than i did - the waiting really is the hardest part. Rescue remedy all the way x

leeloo1 · 30/07/2012 20:54

Oh LittleMiss I'm so sorry, that really is rubbish! You poor thing. I hope you're being well looked after. Perhaps at least now you know for definite you can start to grieve, but thats such a small consolation I know. :(

My scan isn't til 7th Aug. I realised the scan I had was actually on Thursday and he said to leave 7-10 days, so it'll be 12 days - but at least it gives the little thing a chance to grow/get a heartbeat if its going to. It probably won't make a difference, but at least I won't wonder if a few extra days would have given a different result. If I'm really going mad then apparently there is a drop-in session on Saturday AMs at 9am at the early pregnancy unit so I could get a scan then...but that'd only be 9 days... can you tell what I've been torturing myself with trying to decide today.

I had to cancel my booking in appointment this morning - as it should have been tomorrow - I just put the phone down on the midwife and howled. Then the rest of the day has been like I'm on a rollercoaster of being fine/ then crying & despairing. I feel like I should be dealing with this better than I am.

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Lolcbcb · 31/07/2012 21:00

Hi leelo and little miss
Any news from either of you?
Hope u both not in painSad
Let me know x

leeloo1 · 31/07/2012 21:16

Hey Lolcbcb, thanks for asking. I wuss'ed out this morning and called the EPU - they said I couldn't be guaranteed a scan on Saturday but they've managed to fit me in on Monday instead - so at least thats 1 less day to wait.

I still haven't had anymore bleeding (so only 4-5 drops on Thursday) but I am still having some bad lower tummy and back ache - which is bad or normal, depending where you google...

So for now I still have my fingers crossed. :)

How are you feeling now? I hope you're doing ok too.

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leeloo1 · 08/08/2012 14:03

I'm sure people have more interesting things to read, but it bugs me when threads aren't updated so...

The scan on Monday didn't go well, the foetal pole was barely any bigger and still no heartbeat. So its officially a MMC and I'm taking the medication to prompt a miscarriage.

Fingers crossed after this I'll get pregnant again quickly and it'll have a better outcome next time.

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pebspop · 08/08/2012 18:41

sorry to hear your news.

i was hoping for a positive outcome for you.

i am having a bit of spotting in my fourth pg and i am praying it's not another mc. the others have all ended badly.

Lolcbcb · 08/08/2012 20:25

Oh leelo that sucks Sad
I'm so sorry it turned out this way...
I'm feeling better even though sometimes very sad. I think the dream of getting pg again is keeping me more positive and I will have to deal with my feelings if it doesn't happen for me. But I can only hope!
Will u need d&c?how are you feeling???
Hugs xx

jens42 · 08/08/2012 23:32

so sorry x x

leeloo1 · 09/08/2012 12:00

Thanks all - it really does suck!! At the moment I'm feeling a bit numb but kind of ok I think. Its better than the uncertainty last week when I didn't know if it'd work out or not, especially as my morning sickness and sore boobs were getting worse and worse, which really made me think maybe it'd be ok. :( But then yesterday I found out a colleague is due in March (when I was) and I wanted to scream and punch her - so perhaps I'm not quite as ok as I feel.

The tablets to make me miscarry seem to be working though - I've had lots of 'flooding' and a few big clots, so hopefully no need for a d&c. I've been given drugs for nausea and pain and they seem to be working well, so at least thats something!

Pebsbob - I'm really sorry to hear that. I'll keep my fingers crossed you have a better outcome this time. Have you had any tests done to find out whats going wrong? x

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