I feel like a fraud.

[monkeybutt]

4 weeks ago, I got my first BFP. Went to the GP who confirmed I was nearly 4 weeks pg. Felt tired/ravenous all the time; about a week ago my breasts suddenly got very tender/sore.

Fast forward to yesterday, 6 wks on the dot. While at work (in a hospital) I started bleeding - sorry if TMI, but was brown-ish blood. I was concerned, so I spoke to the sister in charge and she sent me to A&E to get checked out. After a quick triage, sample and a 2 hour wait, I get called through to be told that they tested my sample, and it was negative. They tested again, negative. That was it - I was sent straight home. No offer of anything; just told DH to look after me.

This morning I have woken to quite bad period pain and a light AF. This time with alot of clotting and red blood.

I just don't understand why, or how this happened. How can a test say Positive, then Negative 4 weeks later??? Why has this happened to me, and am I wrong in being upset/sad? Was I ever pregnant in the first place? Have I just had a delayed period? I never had any morning sickness or nausea, and I felt pregnant - but I obviously wasn't. I'm so confused, and feel like a complete and utter failiure - but there are so many other women out there who go through much worse than I have. This just so shitty. I don't know what I'm hoping to achieve from writing this post but I need to get this down somewhere and I don't know what else to do.

It was definately the best thing for me. I think I would have suggested going away to DH if we weren't already; I couldn't face the idea of being at home all weekend with nothing to do but think. Life being shit the way it is, though; both DH & I have come back with stinking colds so it's tea and a duvet day for us. I think I may have got away with things a bit easy though - the bleeding has nearly stopped now. Will test in the morning as recommended by my GP to check the hormones have gone.

Tomorrow I will go back to work, but I'm feeling uneasy about it. They all know the situation, which helps but I am not looking forward to all the "poor you" looks. I just want to get in, do my work and get back home again.

Quick question, how soon after a MC should I expect my next period? Is it 4 weeks/28 days or will it come sooner?

Hi monkey, I was told 4/6 wks after and I got it 33 days later which was pretty much what my old cycles were, good luck tomorrow, first days are always the hardest x

Thanks Kittykat. Xxx

I miscarried 23rd June, still waiting for my period. Thought if got it but still spotting after MC. Can't wait for it, never wanted a period so bad! It does help if people know but I found I'd well up even if ppl said how are you or how you feeling!
I just kept telling myself there's nothing I can do so just have to dust myself off and try again (literally!)
I'll pop on here tomorrow to see how ur day went. Nice to know other people around to chat too who have been through it because I would have no idea if not been through it myself.

You're so right Haylebop, this site and thread have been an immense source of information and comfort for me these past few days. I finish work at 6pm, will get an update done once I'm back.

It certainly brings home just how many women go through it and that everything you feel might seem not normal but it is. I didn't realize how hard it was to lose something you never knew or had seen. But you plan for it.
Wishing you luck for tomorrow :-)

Well, today was......okay. I got a lot of hugs and kind words. Only downside was being asked "are you pregnant?" I said no, she replied "oh right, I heard that you are" so I had to explain things. To which she relied "ah, that's a shame. Oh well, see you!". Bitch.

Also had a cracker of a headache all day. I've had some dinner and a shower, as well as extra strong painkillers and now I'm feeling better. Tomorrow is another day....I will also test again in the morning to check my hormones are gone. Then I can really wallow in self pity.

Glad today was okay,.. Some people really don't understand... (I didn't tbh before I went through it!)
It's hard when ppl think you are pregnant, most of the people I know knew because I suffer extreme sickness which kinda gives it away. My response is I was but didn't go according to plan.
Here's to a negative test and hopefully some "closure"
X

Hi monkey, glad today went ok for you, each little step at a time!
About repeat test, did the doctor give you a time frame to take it? I only ask because I was told 2 wks and did it after 10 days thinking itd be gone by now and still came up pregnant, I did a digi as wanted to be sure and that's quite hard seeing, by 2 wks it had gone x

My test this morning was negative, and the bleeding has well and truly stopped now. It all feels a bit final - and I'm actually a tiny bit more like my old self today. Maybe you're right Haylebop; I probably needed that closure. At least now I can say it is all really over and finished with; and now I can look forward. I better book a wax!!

Definitely lobster. Having the all clear from
The hospital provided me with the thought that's it's dealt with now. Unfortunately one of my friends was due 3 days after me do seeing her getting her bump etc is really hard. Especially when I think that should be me too!
I hope that everything goes well next time if that's your plan and don't he afraid to get upset at random times over anything.
We're tough cookies us women :-)

And on the wax subject... I ended up in a and e during my miscarriage and had to apologize for downstairs!!! She didn't say anything but probably had a good giggle later!!

Haha Haylebop, that was one thing I was worried about - I was mortified!!!

DH and I decided we're going to wait a month or 2 before trying again. I feel good about it - I don't want to rush back into anything because I think I'm ready; as I'm probably not as much as I think - and it will be around the time of DH'a birthday and a holiday to the Lakes so it's falling into place.

Sorry Kitty I just realised I never answered your question!! My GP advised to re-test when the bleeding has stopped, as I had a positive test when I saw him. If it was positive again, I would have to go back as it would mean it hadn't all "passed". I waited til a day after, and he said as long as it was negative we could start trying straight away.