So, today i went to see the nurse, she gave me great information about contraception.

[tightwad]

Came away with the pill, a load of info about the pill, info about the mereana coil, condoms, had my BP taken.

She really could not have been less interested however.

Bit off putting.

Anyway, i just cant do it, i cant bring myself to swallow that first pill, af will be here probably tomorrow if not, day after.

God help me with this its fucking torture, unfair, shite, and more shite.

I don't understand- why don't you want to take the pill? Did you not want contraceptive advice?

Sorry, half a story there.
Just had 7th mc. Im 41.
Everyone says to me "no more now, thats it, you cant keep doing this"
I have complied and made the appointment.

SPose that i have been ttc for so fucking long, contraceptives go completely the opposite to how my mind has workd for years.

I just dont feel ready to finish it all. Feel i could keep going another couple of years, try again.

I'm so sorry for you. I did think that might be the case, but wasn't sure. I hope you have someone you can talk to in rl. It is crappy, really crappy for you. I'm sorry. Stupid nurse at doctors. I am a practice nurse and would Definately hope I would have some more compassion.

If you don't feel ready, don't finish ttc. People older than you have successfully conceived in you're circumstances.

So sorry for your situation tightwad, you say "Everyone says to me no more..." But obviously you don't feel that way.

I would never suggest that you should keep trying if your DP is against it, or if there are strong medical reasons for you not to try again, but it seems obvious that you need more time to adjust.

If a decision has to be made about contraception is it worth going for a diaphram or condoms, it might make you feel a bit more in control, less the door is shut and will take a while to open iykwim.

I'm sure there will be loads of people with experience along.

I think spookey that had she could have been more compassionate, she didnt look at me, had my history all wrong and said "so, you dont want to have any more children then?".
To which i answered, no, i would love to have more children, but i cant.

She just typed away, didnt look at me or make any facial expression to what i was telling her. Like she hadnt heard me iyswim.

Completely ignored some of the things i said for eg i told her my BP had been raised previously when i was younger.....she then asked me "have you ever had high BP?"

DH is fully supportive of us ttc again, however he is very worried about the toll this takes on me. Its very distressing for him to witness as i end up hospitalised as i cannot cope with the pain.

Tightwad I can't read and run. I've only had two MCs (only ha) but I can understand totally what you're going through. I'm 40 by the way. If you can keep going, and you want to, what's to stop you? Some pain? Come on. Ignore what everyone else thinks.

Your practice nurse might have given up on life, but reading your posts, I can tell you haven't.

If you don't want to keep trying, I agree with wryd, it's johnnies all the way for me too. I hate the idea of tampering with my own fertility, especially as it's something that I now see as being so precious. Maybe you could go with that?

LOL nocluenoclueatall you have made me smile !

Dont mind pain..the drugs are very good. Ive worked out what i will do if i mc again so that no one will know, D&C......done dusted quickly.

Oh hell

No wise words from me: only saw this, and couldn't not say how sorry I am, and how much I hope I'll see another post from you before long, with good news xx

Atta girl. Go with your own instincts.

This is tough, but we're strong women and we're tougher. Good luck!

I know exactly what you mean - I have had 12 miscarriages and an ectopic. I do also have 3 daughters. I will never take contraception though - I just can't.

tightwad you're working out how to MC without anyone knowing - are you ready to give up trying yet? A few weeks ago when you had just miscarried your post was very different and you were definately saying no more.

Did you take that pill??!!

tightwad - give yourself some time. As you know immediately after a miscarriage your family (or in my case my dh) want to protect you and say no more. But will time the desire to try again can come back again. You need to give yourself more time before starting on the pill, then do it. If you need a small break from ttc, then do it. Only you know what you need.

dropdeadfred - I have had 12 miscarriages and have 3 children too. Seems we are both as mad as each other.

tightwad,

you sound like you are going through hell.

please try raj rai in london. i think he will give you confidence to try again. if he says it's all over then it's all over (but i know he won't).

this is the website of his private clinic. he is available here on wednesday mornings and the initial consultation is £230. this has got to be worth it to help you feel better than you do at the moment.

www.92harleystreet.com/

give them a ring to have a chat. you don't have to wait long for an appointment. i travelled down from lancashire to see him - you can get cheap train fares of you book ahead and the office is walking distance from euston.

ps i use condoms too!

tightwad so sorry to hear what you're going through. I'm guessing you've had testing for recurrent miscarriages? Second what pebspop says, read lots of good things about him on threads. Good luck whatever you decide.