medical management vs waiting for a natural mc...

[soveryfedup]

hey ladies,

After three weeks of waiting to have a mc I am to see the drs tomorrow and have another scan which will finally put an end to this horrible limbo. I will be 9 weeks but baby never developed in the sac, so I will be mcing only the sac which will be about 25mm. I have never mc'ed before, have a 2 year old DS but my DH can be home if and when i need him to be.

I cannot have an ERPC, am considering the tablets or just waiting. I have had no spotting and am still feeling pretty pg so my body clearly isn't keen on mc'ing any time soon. I did have cramping but this stopped over a week ago. think i will mc sometime between 10-12 weeks.

have any of you ladies done the tablets, if so did you do them at home or in hospital and was is ok? I had a natural homebirth with DS so am super keen to wait it out, but life is speeding by, I can't work and am scared to leave the house for fear I will mc! three weeks of this and I am kind of used to it but it is pretty depressing too.

Has anyone waited and was this ok for you? how did you manage your life while waiting?

thank you for reading. I didn't post before because I assumed I would do the tablets but as it gets closer I am getting scared/sad about forcing it. x

No practical advice but will be watching your thread as I am in same position - found out on Thursday that my 9 wks pregnancy was infact a 6 week foetal pole with no heartbeat. I have to go back in two weeks and am waiting to physically m/c, but like you, I have no symptoms at all (no spotting, boobs still 'pregnant') I have been ok this weekend as dh and two dc's at home, so keeping me busy and occupied, but dreading tomorrow and the days ahead when I am alone.

I hope it goes ok for you, whatever happens. x

Hello. I've had 2 miscarriages and have taken both expectant management and medical management. I didn't have long to wait really, so no advice there I'm afraid, but can let you know how it went for me.

I opted for expectant management with the first mc because I was bf at the time. I was in a similar position to yourself soveryfedup - small empty sac but was about 8 weeks along. However things moved more quickly for me as I had a scan that showed things weren't right, started spotting the next day and had the mc about 5 days later. I had strong cramps for a few hours before the mc started properly so had some warning. The worst was over in about half an hour to an hour, and after that I bled no more than with a normal period.

With my second mc I was further along - around 9 weeks - but the baby measured around seven and a half weeks with no hb. I went for medical management because after waiting a week without spotting I didn't know how long it might take. I also had strong pregnancy symptoms and it felt unbearable to be nauseous and exhausted when I knew there wouldn't be a positive outcome.

I was given one tablet which I was told would block progesterone and get things started and was told to come back 2 days later for a full day in hospital where I'd get the second series of tablets. I had some spotting and cramping after the first tablet. The day in hospital wasn't bad. The second series of tablets encouraged the womb to empty. It was painful but I got strong painkillers and it all happened quite quickly. The staff were very supportive and I was glad to get home that evening knowing it was over.

I'm not sure if you can take the medical management option at home as the second series of tablets have to be administered every 3 hours and they probably need to monitor your reaction to them.

Okay, I hope this isn't too much of a ramble. This is a crappy situation to be in so take care of yourselves. I wish you all the best x x

Thinking of you today lovely x

Hi fed up, how'd you get on today? I've my erpc on wed, have been waiting nearly 4 wks now for this natural mc to happen, like you still feeling sick and pregnant. Like you I've been feeling like life is just on hold at the minute waiting for this, so can understand the feeling of needing it over. I imagine you'll be feeling pretty low today, I know that any time I go back to hosp or have to see lifeless scans it brings it all back, so let us know how your doing

Hi Sovery and Harriet. I'm so sorry to hear about your situations - it's really a horrible time. I haven't had medical management, but also had a developed sac and no foetus. I started spotting at just over 12 weeks and scan showed the sac about 8-9 weeks size and no foetus. As I was already bleeding and it was a Friday I waited it out and lost most of it on the Tuesday.

I found it pretty hard going to have it naturally at home. I had very heavy bleeding late morning after I passed the sac, and then again for hours in the late evening. Both times I went to A&E and the second time they kept me in two nights to see if they had to do an ERPC to get the rest out and stop the bleeding. I was in a lot of pain when I went in the ambulance the second time and on gas and air - we found out later it was a large clot that had got stuck in my cervix (sorry, far tmi). It was pretty traumatic and I had flashback type memories for months afterwards.

But I'm glad I waited it out really. Because there was no foetus I had started to feel like a fraud, and like I wasn't really pg at all. The natural mc meant I had labour contractions, and the process just made me accept that I had been pg after all and it was a pretty big deal when it ended. However I guess you'd get that with medical management as well. I think they do do it in hospital, you have to be observed, so you probably couldn't be at home. My situation was different in that I was already bleeding so it had started. I think I would have been more keen to go for intervention if that hadn't been the case though.

I hope you can come to good decisions for yourselves. I felt very bleak when presented with the options really and just like I didn't want to engage with it at all.

thank you so much ladies for sharing your stories, I am very grateful (and sad to hear of your experiences).

I have been advised to go for medical managment, as we have known about the pregnancy stopping for 3-5 weeks and the scan lady said the placenta etc was looking very robust. Wouldn't be likely to mc any time soon! they were worried about any kind of infection and it is known for some ladies to just not mc naturally and i am presenting as one of those. So I have got myself a really sticky pregnancy... without the chuffing baby!

Start the procedure on weds... went for a run tonight as the beginning of my new life. Dreading the hospital bit, crouching over a bowl in a bay sounds bloody (ha) awful. Do love coming across positive stories of MM and that it was simple enough.

Thanks again :)

Ah So...

glad you are finally going to be sorted out and get healing properly x

Placenta behaving like that, could it possibly be a molar pregnancy? Admit I don't know an awful lot about them but that is ringing a bell, have they mentioned that at all? Might be worth asking?

no I don't think so foo, is just pretty hardy and doing its job splendidly :)

Going for a run sounds good. I ran a lot after my mc and found it really freeing. I hope the mm goes straightforwardly.

thanks phil. I ran in the pouring rain and seriously think it was the best jog of my life! So cleansing and sorted my brain out.