Am i stupid for not wanting a rescan??

[TashaM1989]

Hey ladies, im new to this blogging thing but really REALLY need some advice.

3weeks ago (26th Febuary) I suffered a miscarriage, i was just under 10weeks :-(
it was so traumatic, passing the first clot was just unbearable, the physical and mental pain was just horrible. Im 22 and this was my first pregnancy, i was booked in for a "rescan" 10days after my m/c , however when the day came i litterally could not bring myself to go, so i cancelled and re-booked it, but when the next appointment came, i did the same, cancelled it.

I just dont think i can face it, having it all confirmed again and laying it that same room where i first saw my tiny baby.

Is the rescan important?? please help me, i feel so confused and all over the place still... is this normal??

xx

I'm so sorry for your loss, Tasha. I had a MC last March - also my first PG, about 8 1/2 weeks in. I was scanned initially (internal scan) but after that they just took blood about 4 times to check that my pregnancy hormones were decreasing. I don't know whether that's possible in place of another scan? To be honest though, that was also horrible as I had to keep going back to the same room and all the memories that that brought. In some ways (looking back - the benefit of hindsight...) I might have preferred just having one more scan and getting it over with in one go. I hated seeing the hormone levels dropping each time I was tested as it was another reminder that I was no longer pregnant. They do need to check, for your own well-being, that everything is 'gone' - sorry if that sounds too harsh!

I think that your feelings are entirely normal. You will feel all over the place for a while but it does get better, I promise. You don't forget but it does get easier. Following my MC, I suddenly found out about a lot of other people I knew who had had one and had subsequently gone on to have healthy pregnancies and babies. It is far more common than I realised.

Not sure if that's helpful! xxx

thank you so much for your reply, i think thats what im most scared of, going back and all the memories coming flooding back, i never thought having a m/c could be so traumatic, of course i was aware its upsetting but the feeling when it actually happens to you is just unbearable! when i first went into hospital it was a friday night and got taken to a&e where they made me wait for half an hour, i was crying and terrified. i went back each night of the weekdn with the most painfull tummy cramps ive ever experieced, yet they still kept sending me home, it wasnt until FIVE DAYS later they decided to scan me, which is when they confirmed what i already knew.

the way i was treated by the hospital has put me off going back also, me and my partner have had to deal with it with no help from any proffesionals, not even my midwife has called (its now been 3weeks) and i just dont want to go back for it all to become so fresh again.

the pregnancy wasnt planned but we were both thrilled when we found out, would it be stupid of me to try again? even though the 1st wasnt planned? is it too soon? im 22 and rele dont have anyone to talk to about this sort of stuff??

im so sorry for your loss also, i hope youve made a full recovery xx

Hi - I am so sorry to hear about your loss. What a dreadful thing to go through. I really hope you are OK.

I have to say you really should go for a rescan. I had a mc and passed HUGE clots for over 3 hrs. I thought that all must now be clear, but at the re-scan they found that the actual pregnancy sac was stuck in my cervix and needed to be removed in an ERPC. I had stopped bleeding too.

Please understand I am not saying this has happened to you but you probably should be checked out for your own health. If any products are left behind they may become infected.

Good luck xx

i'm so sorry you went through this. I had a MMC in Feb this year. I can understand why you don't want to go back- my GP asked how i felt about going back when it looked like i might need another scan after my ERPC. In the end i didnt get a scan done because when i talked to a nurse on that ward she said to do a pregnancy test. She said if the test was negative there was no point being rescanned as i'd have no retained products, so that's what i'd do if i were you - get a pregnancy test done. If its still positive you need to go back.
I didnt get a call from my midwife either, they are just so very very busy, anyone lucky enough to speak to one after a MC is very fortunate. Your GP should be able to talk through what happened though and they may even offer counselling. FWIW i had a MC same age as you and a few months later was pregnant again and had successful pregnancy- she's now 19!

Hello again

It sounds like you had a pretty horrible (although, sadly, not that uncommon an) experience. It is terribly distressing going through a MC. I also had to go to A&E and be scanned there, then referred to EPU for the following day, having had to stand in the Dr surgery and explain to the receptionist why I wanted an emergency appointment in the first place etc, having bled from Fri all over the weekend, as otherwise there was no way I would have been seen.

Can you take someone with you when you do go back - either your partner or a good friend. The friends I told were incredibly supportive although it came as a bolt from the blue to them as they'd not known about the pregnancy.

You're not silly to want to try again either, although you might want to wait until your body has got back into its natural rhythm and emotionally you're able to separate the two - there's no 'set time' that you should wait. My MC was at the end of March last year and then I fell pregnant again in June (which some people may think too soon) and my baby was due yesterday - although it's now keeping me waiting!!! I didn't mention that yesterday as I didn't want to rub salt into the wound. The MC was on my mind for most of the first 12 weeks of this pregnancy, which I think is probably normal.

You will be ok, I'm sure of it - it may just take some time. People on here tend to be really good with this sort of thing too as there are a lot of people who have gone through it all and have come out the other side.

You may find this site helpful www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/

Big hug!

xx

Hi Tasha, so sorry for your loss. I think you should go for your scan. I've had a rough time with the hospital and despite my bleeding stopping and starting and my hcg level dropping slower than normal they are refusing to give me a scan. My GP is really good and she is really cross with the hospital over this so I just have to keep getting my bloods checked - which in itsself is distressing - I feel like a pin cushion!

If you don't feel you can face the hospital again try talking to your GP about having blood tests as once your hcg level as dropped they can be certain everything has passed and a urine pregnancy test may not pick up small levels of hormone.

I don't think you should time frame on trying again, you should go for it when you are both emotionally ready. I felt like I would never want to try again when I found out last week the I'd had an mc but now I just want everything sorted out so I can try again, although some say that you should wait until your next period so they can date the pregnancy. I'll be ttc as soon as I stop bleeding!

Good luck with it all xx

sorry its taken so long to reply ladies, thank you for all your advice/support and sorry to everyone that has been through a mc :-(

im going to see a doctor and re-arrange a rescan, i think its important that i have it done.

thanks again girls really has helped xx