erpc tomorrow

[elliejjtiny]

And I'm really scared. Scan on tuesday when should have been 12+6 showed baby died at 8+4. Have had 2 earlier natural miscarriages 1 healthy and NT ds and 2 ds's who are healthy but have SN. I'm having it done in day surgery because gynae dr said that there are no emergencies there so no risk of me being bumped off the list and having to do it on christmas eve. What should I take with me. I was thinking dressing gown, loads of pads, couple of pairs of knickers, a decent book, paracetamol and ibroprofen. Have I forgotten anything? I was also wondering about bringing a tiny blanket and asking them to wrap the baby in it. I wasn't going to ask to see the baby as they already told me he would be too tiny to see much. So I thought I'd rather just see him on the scan and have a picture although it would have been nice to have had a 4d scan of him. Would they wrap him in the blanket for me do you think? I'm still breastfeeding 11mo ds3. will this affect the painkillers I can take? He is with my inlaws tomorrow so I was planning on pumping and chucking the milk tomorrow evening and start feeding him again on saturday. I'm hoping I won't need anything stronger than paracetamol and ibroprofen by then.

Hi Ellie, I can't help with any advice, but I just wanted to post to say how sorry I am for you.

Hi ellie so sorry to hear of you loss. I had an ERPC in similar circumstances a month ago,my first mmc. I think your bag sounds fine, have you got somebody going with you? I had a general anaesthetic and was pretty dopey afterwards so needed someone to look after me (and DS) at home for the next day or so. Regarding the bf-ing, I was given some anti-bs to take as risk of infection is quite high with ERPC as opposed to natural, I got 4 to take all at once when I got home in the evening. They said to not bf for 48hrs and side effects were diarrhoea etc. my DS is 14months and I managed 36hours but was in agony due to engorgement from just stopping and emotionally wanted to be close and "mother" him. What I did find is staff at the day surgery unit had no knowledge of the side effects of the anti-bs and I actually had to read the leaflet to them! Sorry I can't help with whether to take a blanket as I didn't do this (don't even think it crossed my mind, but is a lovely idea) I am now going though PALS to request copies of my scan pictures so you may be able to do this or even ask whilst you are there today. Look after yourself and your DSs at this difficult time. I've found mn a source of great comfort.

Ellie, I am so sorry for your loss, and thinking about you today

Thankyou. I found this one physically so much better than the natural ones. I had to go to gynae ward first for blood tests so I asked the dr there about the blanket and breastfeeding. I said that he was with inlaws until tomorrow so she said I should pump and chuck any milk away tonight and then feed him tomorrow although I need to watch him for diarroeah. I wasn't sure if I was far along enough that I could get milk "coming in" for this baby and I didn't want anyone to give me anything to dry it up, thinking they were being helpful so I told everyone I saw that I was still breastfeeding ds3.

She also said it would be fine to wrap the baby in the blanket and I should give it to one of the nurses. There was a nurse who was coming round and chatting to me and a couple of other ladies who were looking like they might cry. She went through with me the options with what to do with the baby and I opted for a burial at the crematorium in the baby memorial garden with other babies miscarried in december. She said I could talk to the chaplains today if I liked but the one I saw last time was one of those people who are so kind that they just have to look at me and I burst into tears and I just wanted to get the operation done and escape so I said I would go and have a chat in the new year and write something in the baby rememberance book there. I talked to the nurse about the blanket and she asked if I was sure I didn't want to keep it for his memory box and I said no, I want it to stay with him. She gave it to one of the theatre nurses and then she went to see the baby afterwards to check they had done it.

We can go to the memorial service if we want to but I'm not sure whether to do that or do something a bit more personal to us at home with lots of cake afterwards.