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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

need to get it out

7 replies

rugbychief · 12/12/2011 12:12

I don't know if I'm really looking for an answer to this post but I just feel like I need to get out off my chest. I miscarried on Saturday morning at 6 and a half weeks. We've spent years talking about having kids and only a few months trying so when we got the blue line a couple of weeks ago we dared to let ourselves get excited. We let "Bean" creep into our conversations and my DH even let himself get his hopes up. I thought I had started to feel better this morning (not at work but feel guilty about that too) but now I'm in floods of tears and bouncing between frustration and devastation. I have an appointment at the doctors this afternoon and I don't know what to expect. Because 6 weeks is so early I'm worried the Doctor will just note it on my records and that be that but I don't think I can cope with his indifference when I feel like this. My husband had to go to work today so I'm on my own but I know he's just as upset if not more so where he is right now.

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PerishStorm · 12/12/2011 12:22

Didn't want you to go unanswered as you are clearly going through a terrible time. Yes six weeks is early on in a pregnancy but that will not affect your devastation. I would suggest (and I don't have any experience of this particularly) maybe writing a list of how you feel so that you can take it to your GP, it may help you to articulate how you are feeling and be able to make him take you seriously. Hopefully, you will have a GP who is sympathetic, but if you feel fobbed off or not taken seriously, you have a right to see someone else.

Thinking of you and your DH.

rugbychief · 12/12/2011 12:34

thank you sooo much for your response. I guess I did need to hear an answer after all! I know the GP I am seeing is particularly unsympathetic but he's the only one I can see today so I will make a list of thew questions and feelings I have, I think that will really help so thank you. I just hope this feeling leaves us soon. I know we'll be ok and looking at other people's posts I have to take the feeling that we are quite "lucky" that we have each other and that it was early but it just doesn't stop the feeling of devastation.

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schobe · 12/12/2011 14:14

Oh it is so awful no matter how long it took to conceive etc etc. You're bound to be completely devastated.

Is there anyone who can tuck you up on the sofa with tea, chocolate, mince pies etc? If not, you should do it yourself and watch some rubbish on TV or read a book. Just treat yourself and don't feel you should be acting as normal. You need time to process what's happened.

I hope you get a nice doctor this afternoon, but don't take any notice if they seem indifferent. You're wise to get checked out and have your notes updated.

baublelugs82 · 12/12/2011 15:04

Hi rugby - I am also off work at the moment, i had a MC last Saturday (the 3rd) at 9+5 but the baby had died at 6+6.

What you are feeling is TOTALLY normal. You need to give yourself time and space. Your Dr will possibly offer you a sick note, mine did. He gave me one for 4 weeks but im going back next Monday. Today is the first day i've felt positive about life and TTC again.

Physically, the bleeding has stopped but was awful for the first few days. Sleep, eat and just keep warm. Don't expect too much. I cried watching X-factor last night because Little Mix have got everything they want, and i've just lost what i wanted.

There are a few of us who MC'd at the same time on here so you'll see some regular posters. Unfortunately MC is more common that i ever realised.

Take care of yourself.

farfallarocks · 12/12/2011 16:04

It does not matter how early it was, you have still made room for that person.

I had a really early MC/chemical pregnancy and lost it at 5/6 weeks. I had already signed up for NCT and been to the docs and got a scan letter through :(
You have made room for that person and already imagined how pregnant you will be at various events etc

You poor lamb, take care of yourself and take comfort in the fact that the vast majority of people in your position will go onto have a healthy pregnancy next time

pookiecat · 12/12/2011 21:13

Be kind to yourself xx

rugbychief · 14/12/2011 10:24

thank you all for your lovely comments. I know in my heart of hearts we will get over this and go on to have a lovely family, I think it is the closeness to Christmas and "family holidays" that is reinforcing the sadness. I hope you are all getting the support you deserve x

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