suspected molar pregnancy and so sad

[leopardprintmama]

Last week I had a d and c due to a scan and blood tests that strongly suggested that I had a molar pregnancy. Im still so upset and angry about the whole thing and most of all scared. My family, including my husband are not sympathetic at all I guess as I already have 4 kids but it doesnt make any differance to me im gutted to say the least.

It was a much wanted baby....... my husband had a vasectomy reversal nine months ago; it had taken me a year to convince my hubbie to have the reversal and then another 9 months to conceive. So when I finally did fall pregnant I was over the moon. Then at 7 weeks I started to bleed, went for a scan and the next day was in the operating theatre getting a d and c.
Im so sad I cant stop crying and I have nobody to talk to, my husband says he's fed up hearing me moan about it and that it wasnt even really a baby, it was a baby to me. And im scared because if this is a molar pregnancy there is a risk I could develop cancer from it, its such a scary thought. And if im lucky enough not to develop cancer I still face 6 months of blood tests, urine samples and not being able to conceive for at least another 6 months! Which is a fact im not dealing with too well cos right now I feel like I want to start ttc straight away. So sorry for moaning and ranting but I just needed to get all this out my system somehow as ive nobody to talk to :-(

I'm so sorry :( Have just had to look up molar pregnancy as I'd never heard of it. I hope you manage to get some support.

Thanx id never heard of it either and not many people have thats part of the problem talking to others about it. Plus I feel like a bit of a freak cos its quite a rare thing to have

I know somebody who had a partial molar pregnancy. Of course it was a baby to you. Your husband's reaction is so unhelpful but that's how dhs are sometimes with thsi sort of thing. Dh and I have talked about this and he said that whilst of course he would have been upset had we lost any of our dcs in pregnancy, the baby did not feel 'real' to him till she arrived. I know she (all three of them) was very real to me long before that and therein is the difference.

There are some other mums on here who have had molar pregnancies - you're in the right section, I'm sure they'll spot you.

As you know, you may - if it is molar - need treatment and you will certainly need follow up. I want to reassure you that this is one area where modern medicine knows exactly what it's doing. The treatment for detected molar pregnancies works. The follow up regime works. Physically you will get past this and you will be ok and I truly hope that this time next year you can be thinking about your next baby. Good luck

Thank you for your kind words, yes ive got a couple of weeks they said to wait for the results of the erpc and then I will know exactly what im dealing with, this wait for the results is really hard ......... im fearing the worst.
Yes I understand what your saying about men's reaction to pregnancy loss, normally I can see things in a logical and positive manner, but right now im feeling so down my emotions are getting in the way of all logic if that makes any sense.

It just hurts doesn't it? No need to try and be logical.

Have you seen this site?

yeah it does alot, im ok when im busy but as soon as I stop being busy the sadness comes. Keep wondering if I will ever have a healthy pregnancy.... but I guess thats a normal fear that all women have when theyve lost a baby. No havent seen that site will have a look thanks

I had a molar pregnancy about ten years ago. It was a bit persistent, so it took a while to get rid of it entirely and I was advised to wait a year to TTC, but then got pregnant immediately and everything was fine.

It is all a bit scary at first, and the waiting seems for ever, but most women who have had a molar go on to have another healthy pregnancy. There's loads of information online, and I gather the follow-up support in this country is very good (I was overseas).

There are a couple of long threads about molar pregnances on MN if you do a bit of searching - lots of reassuring stuff and good outcomes.

Sounds like your DH is just being very logical and rational about it, and doesn't understand how emotionally traumatic it can be to leap in one day from being pleased to be pregnant (and starting to think about babies and names etc) to being in hospital and finding out stuff about possibly needing chemotherapy and waiting months to try again. Maybe get him to read some of the websites etc?

I am sorry for your loss. And a molar pregnancy is a loss. If you had a partial mole then there would have been a fetus/baby-even if it was sadly not a viable one.

I had a molar pregnancy 10 years ago and one of the hardest things was trying to get information/explain it to people. I was unfortunate in that I went on to need treatment-chemo but I am totally fine now and have gone on to have 3 dcs so please do not be scared or give up hope.

Thanx yeah I have looked on mn at the other threads about molar pregancy, it seems from what ive read that molar pregnancy is a nightmare at the time but that the future outlook is very positive. I still havent had any results back yet so I have no idea if it was a partial or complete molar. But since only a yolk sac was seen im guessing its prob a complete molar. I know I will feel so much better when I have the results back and know for sure what is going to happen next.

Exexpat u r totally right in what u say the trauma for me has definately been going from being so excited that the vasectomy reversal had worked to then being told I was losing my baby then 2 weeks later being told its more than likely ive had a molar pregancy; and that there is a small risk of it turning into cancer.

Fingers crossed for you - we are in the same situation unfortunately.
Fingers crossed for us both....

Thanks Twinkle

Hooray - I'm soooooooooooo relieved - the results came back clear!!!