cant believe it...

[naughtyds]

found out yesterday a friend is expecting on my due date :-(

had mmc just before christmas at 12 weeks- she is around 25 weeks now.

I am actually happy for her as it took her 5 years to get pregnant with her first and this 2nd pregnancy will mean 22 months between DC1 and DC2 so wish her nothing but happiness

just thought i was completely over it and the little fact that she is due on exact same day just threw me a bit

ahh... hopefully this 3rd cycle since m/c will be the one with the BFP...

Don't be hard on yourself. I had a mmc in 2009. My due date was horrendous.... My SIL got PG shortly after I miscarried and I cried for 2 days... I was pleased for her, sort of. But was, quite frankly, bloody jealous and still very raw. It just rubs salt in the wound. It took us 11 months until next BFP and DD is now 4.5 months and so appreciated and loved.
Try and just through every day and don't be hard on yourself... Your feelings are normal.
Good luck with that BFP
HTH

Ohh, that's harsh!

My bf got prg at the same time as me, due 2 days apart. But I had a mmc 8 weeks ago. It is really hard some days though, because it is a constant reminder of what I've lost.

She's been brought forward a few days after scan, and is having a cs, so even further forward. I'm glad about that, but it's still the same time!!

There really is no easy answer to this, but to be honest I think there could be potentially a lot of situations that will remind you of your loss. The main one being the due date.And whilst I have no friends etc with a similar date that I know of, mine was a memorable date of 11.11.11.
Please dont feel bad about your reaction,I think there is too much pressure on women who have suffered a loss at any stage to 'be brave' but you need to grieve.
And please know that any loss is a loss, this would have been my 4th,planned I might add,only as people these days seem to think anything more than two is a mistake.
I cannot put into words how I feel,but think that there isnt enough support as I feel like a fraud. Anyway,I just wanted to say you are not alone x

hi ladies,
sorry i'm not ignoring you, just come back on. thanks for all your replies.

kentmummy- god having another baby in the family as close as SIL must have been so hard, a constant reminder, and 11 months for BFP too- but resulting in a gorgous DD, wonderful- congratulations.

harrased- sorry fo your loss- that must be so hard for you. Hope that your friend is understanding. A few days here and there might help a bit but can imagine it's really painful seeing her still.

morethemerrier.a miscarriage for a 4th baby is just as devastating as it would be for a 1st or second- so sorry. I have one DS who is 2 and it just makes my heart ache looking at him being so cute, upset he isnt going to have a sibling just yet. I think big families are lovely. There is absolutely no cause for feeling like a fruad- it's a horrible thing to have to go through, you need to deal with it in your own way and own time.

thanks all, just emailing my pregnant friend now to see if she fancies playdate with our 2 DS1s.. she must be knackered with an 18 month old and that big belly- maybe i can watch her DS1 while she has a cuppa in peace.

xx