Work and miscarriage

[sazza70]

Hello ladies,
I have just been diagnosed with a missed m/c at 9+1 after IVF. Feel like I'm on an emotional roller coaster at the moment waiting for the bleeding to start in earnest and not sure whether to go into work tomorrow?

What have other people done?
Thank you
S x

What do you feel like doing?
What is going to make you feel better - at work taking your mind off it (as long as you can escape home if needs be), or at home in front of the tv wrapped in a duvet? Or even pottering round a shop if that helps?

Really, do what you need to do to keep yourself on an even keel, don't put any pressure on yourself if you can help it.

You are right! I think that knowing what I want to do is half the problem!! What I really want to do is curl up in a ball and emerge when it is all over......but this could take up to a few weeks judging by the posts I have read so far.
I think I will see how the day progresses and how much sleep I get tonight!
Thank you
S x

Good for you, it's not very nice.
Watch something stupid on tv perhaps (Xfactor....) and perhaps get into a position where you can choose first tghing tomorrow. ie get your sandwiches & clothes ready in case you want to go in, but think about what you would do if you don't want to.

If you have just that little bit of control over the situation, a chance to decide what you want to do minute by minute, I found it helped me when decisions are taken away from you like when you m/c.

Crikey, hope the last bit made sense, not sure it was in English.

hee, hee, totally understand! You are right about the control thing. I will attempt to get to bed at a respectable hour tonight and read a trashy novel. Clothes already ironed for work but not even thought about lunch yet!!
Thank you for your support.
S x

What did you decide? I had a missed m/c diagnosed last week at 13 weeks. I had to have an erpc and so had last week off because of the GA but went back to drs on Saturday and got signed off for 2 weeks until Xmas cos I am still v up and down and just want to hide away and try and get christmassy with my boys. I have a job where I would have had to run meetings and do presentations and just feel like I couldn't cope at the moment. Also there is another pg lady in my office and I just couldn't trust myself not to burst into tears around her. I think everyone copes differently though, hope you manage to enjoy Xmas. Really sorry to hear your news, particularly after ivf.

Well, I went to work but had to leave at 2pm after I started to bleed heavily and have cramps. my team are lovely that I work with, I am very fortunate, but like you I have to present a public face with patients so need to feel A1.
I am taking the rest of the week off, my boy is 3 and will be home Thurs, Fri but I am also very lucky with friends who will rally around if needed.
Like you I have pregnancy all around me, one lady is only one week ahead, that's tough!
Having started miscarrying on my birthday I am now determined to enjoy Christmas!!
I really hope that you can focus on the moment, it's what is helping me at the moment.
I am trying to be objective but my mind keeps on drifting to that little creation which was the start of life and our baby and then I just CRY :(
Sorry for the rant!
S x

Oh honey. Yes, I am trying to distract myself but generally just feel a low-level sadness about what has happened and yes, if I think about it too much I start crying again. Particularly tough that you know someone so close to your dates. Yep, I'm trying to focus on how lucky I am to have healthy children already, sounds like you are making the most of your ds too Take care. Hope that things progress OK with the bleeding and cramping. I didn't go through that bit so can't offer any advice but there are plenty of useful threads on here.

I was diagnosed with missed mc last week (at 12+2 at what was meant to be a routine dating scan) - originally I was going to go straight back to work the next day until I decided what to do (absoulutely crazy, which I realised when woke the next morning. Then I decided to have eprc op so I stayed off until the op and had it yesterday. Going to try to get back to work next week. take care x