My friend phoned today and asked for the best place to buy cheap HPTs?

[Totallyfloaty35]

I had a miscarriage less than 2 wks ago( which she knows about) after i told her ,i put the phone down and cried.
I have now slipped into a dire mood and want to slam doors and scream.
Is this normal? I am pretty shocked at how angry and miserable and downright weepy i feel

How totally thoughtless. However, I am not suprised. When I had just found out my baby had died at 8 weeks I happened to bump into a heavily pregnant 'friend' who had been told what had happened. she said, 'oh my siter had an mc and she couldn't pull herself together either' .

Im so sorry for your loss. My advice is to stay away from people like this,get dp to answer the phone for a while and fend off anyone liable to be insensitive and just focus on your own grief and taking care of yourself. I found posting on here invaluable, we have all been through it and know exactly how devastating a mc is.

Thinking of you. x

So sorry about your mc totallyfloaty. I had one back in July and yes, what you're feeling is completely normal and you are bound to feel angry, etc. It was incredibly thoughless of your 'friend' to say this to you.

I sometimes wonder, when people say things like that, even though they know what the other person has been through, it's because they're just trying to act "normal" around that person. As in "life goes on" IYSWIM.

After my mc I was completely thrown about how my emotions roller-coastered from one day to the next. However, the fantastic ladies on here helped me to see that it was completely normal to feel that way. Even though I'd never seen or heard a heartbeat during the time I was pregnant, I had lost a baby and that's when it hits me the most - the realisation that it was actually a baby. I am dealing with these emotions quite well now (IMO) but I know that it's going to take a long, long time before the pain is substantially lessened.

You take care of yourself, get plenty of rest and keep posting on here it's such a great support. I also found wine & cheese and biscuits helped :)

Good lord how thoughtless, I can not believe how very crap other people are when you have a MC. Just awful I am so sorry, it makes you wonder if these friends are really friends at all.

Mine was 3 months ago now and I still feel so very, very sad. People ask how I am, I say sad and then they tell me all about scans, or difficulty getting maternity clothes, or something like that and I just stare wondering what planet they are on, then I go home and cry and then avoid situations where I would have to see them again. So, as well as having a shite time and losing a baby, I feel incredibly alone and wonder if I have any friends at all. It is just awful and I am sorry your friend is so shite too.

I hope you are getting more support from other people xx

I have bricks in my garden wall with more sensitivity than some people seem to come across post-miscarriage.

I'd have told her a new way to use HPTs - somewhere the sun definitely doesn't shine!

You poor love. It's shite, isn't it? I genuinely think that people who haven't experienced this type of loss have no real understanding of how utterly gut wrenching it is - and continues to be for a long time to come. I tend to get a "oh well, you can always have more kids" vibe from these people as if it were that simple! It certainly made me question all my friendships after my mc.

My advice is to stay away from this person and look after number one, preferably with cake and wine. Hugs. x

She is a silly thick selfish cow. Why does she need you to tell her where to buy HPT's from? Everyone knows they sell them in every supermarket and chemist in the country, couldn't she just look for herself at the prices, ooh I'm annoyed!

Thanks for understanding.
She is (was) aclose friend.but both her and my (best)friend have been rubbish.My best friend has not returned my calls.She only called to ask if i knew where somewhere was and if i was going could she have a lift.She has never asked how i am .
Really im a bit stunned by it.I was there for her when she was widowed(8yrs ago) .Also for my other friend through her divorce.Maybe they dont think my problems are as big as their ones?
I am still confused as to why she asked me about the HPTs seeing as her ds just turned 1yr old ,so surely she remembers where she got her last lot from.

Some people just don't understand / don't know how to react. I was probably one of those people until one of my oldest friends lost her baby at 20 weeks. We were due around the same time. Still can't think about what she went through without welling up.

I'm sorry for your loss.