Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Flip

Original poster

I'm starting to miscarry, what should I do?

21 replies

IamMrsJones · 19/10/2010 01:47

Hi,

I'm 8+2 and have been spotting since Tuesday. It has gradually been getting worse over the weekend.

This evening I started to lose some small clots and tonight I have started with painful cramps and a few more clots etc, but nothing too bad yet.

What am I supposed to do? My blood loss is not huge at the moment but my pain is like labour pain. Still at the really uncomfortable stage rather than the painful stage.

Do I stay at home and ride it out or do I need to contact anyone?

Also, what pain relief can I take?

Thank you very much

OP posts:

strandeadatsea · 19/10/2010 01:59

Goodness me I am so sorry. I can't really offer much advice but hate to think of you sitting there on your own going through this. (or hopefully you are not on your own)

I have never miscarried did have a lot of spotting with dd2 and called NHS Direct. The next day I went into a and e and they scanned me the next morning to confirm a heartbeat.

Hopefully someone will be along soon with better advice.

equator · 19/10/2010 02:01

I am so sorry for your loss :(

When I miscarried naturally(at around 9 weeks) the blood loss at first was period like for several hours.

I was told by the hospital that if my blood loss exceeeded a pad an hour or if the pain became unmanagable then to go to a&e.

If you do decide to go to hosp, do not drive yourself, there was women on the ward the same time as me who had called an ambulance.

Have you thought about phoning NHS direct or a&e for advice?

Thinking of you, I will be around for a while if you want to ask me anything else or just chat
x

ReformedCharacter · 19/10/2010 02:39

I'm so sorry MrsJones.

Do you have anyone to drive you to a&e? I think it's probably better to be there if you're in pain.

I'd at least call NHS direct.

Original poster

IamMrsJones · 19/10/2010 02:46

Thank you all. I've told DH to go to bed as we have 3 DC that need sorting in the morning.

I think I will give NHS a ring and see what they say.

I really wish this wasn't happening.

OP posts:

StarflowerGirl · 19/10/2010 08:16

IamMrsJones I'm so sorry that you're going through this!

I second everyones advice re a&e and also suggest contacting your local Early Pregnancy Unit www.earlypregnancy.org.uk/ for advice.

If you do go to A&E or the EPU they will be able to prescribe painkillers. I found that paracetamol alone wasn't sufficient for the pain I experienced and needed something much stronger.

Like equator I was told at the EPU that if you're soaking through more than one thick maxi pad an hour then you need to go to A&E.

banana87 · 19/10/2010 08:44

I am sorry you are going through this. I had the same on Friday and went to A&E. They do see to you pretty quick and will probably give you fluids and pain relief and admit you. So sorry for your loss.

MUHAHAHADascheese · 19/10/2010 08:48

So sorry to hear this.

Take care of yourself and make sure you have people around you.

Be kind to yourself.

jasmine51 · 19/10/2010 11:15

So sorry to hear what you are going through IamMrsJones. I would echo what everyone else is saying about A&E but for slightly different reasons. I have had 4 mcs and for the first 3 I went to my gp...was booked in for scans in 2 weeks time and was sent away to 'let nature take its course'...felt totally abandoned. For the 4th I took myself to A&E. I got taken from there to the urgent gynae team, where they were wonderful and did some examinations, gave me a scan then were able to collect some tissue samples which got passed on to the recurrent miscarriage clinic when I eventually got the referral by my GP. It sounds mercenary but you will no doubt want answers, reassurance and a kind face and it seems the quickest way to get those is to go via A&E. Good luck
xx

Original poster

IamMrsJones · 19/10/2010 19:34

Thank you all for taking the time out to reply and for your kind words.

I got my friend to take me to the EPAU this morning. They didn't want to scan me initially, but after a while they agreed and sent me down to the antenatal clinic to be scanned. I sat amongst the 20 weekers for an hour and a half as they managed to lose my notes.

They confirmed a delayed miscarriage and gave me the options. I chose to have a D&C as I really can't do this horrific pain and limbo for much longer. The cons told me that it can take up to 6 weeks to happen naturally, I was shocked. I can't imagine how horrible that wait would be for someone.

Fortunately, they had a slot for tomorrow, so I've got to be there for 7:30am. I'm so sad as the baby had a heartbeat on Friday and apparently all looked well, but glad this horrible limbo will be over and I can hopefully move on.

Jasmine - I am so sorry this has happened to you a number of times and I'm glad you are getting somewhere with some answers.

OP posts:

sotough · 19/10/2010 20:01

hi there iammrs -poor you. it really is a horrible experience going through a miscarriage like this; but the D+C, assuming it's under general anasthaetic, is pretty straightforward and you won't feel a thing. i've had two D+Cs and the worst bit was being wheeled into theatre, just before getting the anasthaetic, when i felt pretty emotional about it all; but afterwards the recovery was very quick and it really draws a line under it quite nicely, at least physically speaking. you may not get much bleeding at all afterwards and there really is a feeling that it's fully over. as you say, waiting is dreadful. with one of my many miscarriages i wanted to avoid another D+C and waited two weeks for things to get going; and they never did, and i ended up with a D+C anyway, sort of wishing i'd just got it all over and done with earlier.
all the best for tomorrow, and remember, this is highly likely to be a one off experience. it's unusual to have multiple miscarriages like a lot of us on this board.

kat2504 · 19/10/2010 20:03

Very sorry for your loss. It is so hard when you have seen a little heartbeat. You shouldn't have been scanned with the 20 weekers that is very insensitive. That is the whole reason why EPAU units are supposed to be entirely separate from ante-natal.

Glad you can have the ERPC quickly and I hope it goes well for you tomorrow. Lots of people have posted about the op on this board if you are looking for reassurance about what to expect.

KTRace · 19/10/2010 21:02

I am so very sorry for your loss, I hope all goes ok with the operation. x

StarflowerGirl · 19/10/2010 22:08

Sorry to hear this IamMrsJones. I will be thinking of you tomorrow.

geraldinetheluckygoat · 19/10/2010 22:17

Im so sorry to read your story, I hope you are ok and that someone is taking good care of you xx

jasmine51 · 20/10/2010 16:31

IamMrsJones - are you home now? Are you ok? We are all thinking about you at this horrible time
xx

Original poster

IamMrsJones · 21/10/2010 14:10

Hi again,

It means so much that you have been thinking of me.

It all went well yesterday. Staff were really nice and I slept all afternoon.

As soon as I got home and looked at DH, i haven't stopped crying. I keep thinking about whether it would have had his eyes. Silly I know. I Wasn't expecting to feel quite so low and emotional.

I also have a weird, what now feeling. I dunno what to be at.

Sorry for rambling
x

OP posts:

KTRace · 21/10/2010 14:20

I am glad the operation went well and that the staff were nice.

Cry, let it all out. I am still crying on an almost daily basis and my MC started 6 weeks ago. I have just gone to ask for counseling and wish that I had said yes to it when they offered it to me all those weeks ago as it would have helped to have had someone to talk to who was not involved in the situation. My advice would be ask for counseling now.

Take care and again I am so very sorry you are going through this x

geraldinetheluckygoat · 21/10/2010 21:00

Iammrsjones, I felt very much similar after I had my miscarriage. it takes a while to get over it, its a bereavement at the end of the day, so give yourself time, and allow yourself to feel however you feel. xxx
It took me a few months to properly come to peace with mine, we brought a blossom tree and planted it in the garden, its moved house with us once!
I've had two kids since, and i still sometimes think about the one I lost, and feel a little sad, but that horrible raw greif you feel right now will lessen with time, so take heart, and take your time. It will get easier, I promise xx

babymama105 · 24/10/2010 21:18

Sorry to hear of your lose, treat as a bereavement, make sure you have people to talk to and look after you. I had 2 miscarriages - no reason, now have a beautiful baby boy. You are in my prayers, keep savex

babymama105 · 24/10/2010 21:20

The most important thing I do is keep the two babies I lost in my prayers at all times, that is the greatest tribute - remberancex

PercyPigPie · 26/10/2010 13:54

Sorry to hear it has all been so painful IamMrsJones, I hope that, physically at least, it is easing up now.

Flip