Ouch! Miscarriage 9 weeks.

[Purplebuns]

I believe I am miscarrying, been bleeding for a day and it is heavier and I am passing clots now, how much pain can I expect?

I am 9+4 I haven't had any scans to see if it a MMC or I am going to pass a 9 week gestation baby.

I do have an appointment set up for Monday, to have blood tests and things.

It already feels like early labour pains in my back and hips.

I am not bleeding heavily yet so I guess the pain is going to get worse and I just don't know if I can face it.

I have never had MC before and really don't know what to expect :(

Hi, the focus has definitely been on getting through the day.. no washing up has been done and takeaway for tea.
We are both so sad today and our DD has picked up on the atmosphere a little and is also tired as she had a late night, and was out of routine going to her grandparents lastnight.

Slightly concerned as I am starting to get a needling pain occasionally in my cervix, but I will just wait and see :)

Bluebump- I remember and thank you, it was Golden Buddha for dinner

Oh purpebuns i am so sorry to hear that. Just found this thread and have been rooting for you whilst reading them all and have just read your post.

You have been so brave and very positive - very proud of you.

Had a mc myself with first pg and it was devastating too. Was in a waiting room full of teenage mums and a tv of Trisha showing a program " i'm pg and want a termination", i could have screamed. Nurse also telling me off for bleeding all over the ward floor.

Hospitals do have an remembrance book for you to write something as it was a life and you have lost someone - it does help.

So sorry again for your loss and for the other posters losses too

purple, if you think something is wrong go to the hospital now.
best wishes.

Hi, thanks everyone, especially when you say I have done well, that really helps when I am having a miserable moment.

I didn't want to get out of bed and was crying again as I remembered it all, this morning :(

I am perking up a little now, but I am not up to much as I still feel uncomfortable.

My stomach was really swollen afterwards which was a kicker as I looked about 4/5months gone, this has gone down a bit but I am still enlarged.

I am wondering if I will need an ERPC as I am starting to bleed a little more now. If any of you experienced this what was it like, and the after effects?

I am finding it hard to cope with the idea that it is going to take so long for the pregnancy hormones to subside, I don't actually feel pregnant any more though.

I think the MC was due to stress as in the last 5 weeks, my Grandad has died and I couldn't get to the funeral, my Dad had Heart surgery and my childhood dog was put down. All these things have really upset and/or worried me even my daft old Dog. And to lose my baby now is awful!

Luckily DH and I have the next two weeks booked off as holiday and I am so glad we didn't book anything! This will give us some time to heal.

Sorry for the long post x

Take it easy Purple, and pleased your hubby is around to take care of you.

After my ERPC, I had dark brown bleeding, like a light period. It got heavier and turned red about a week later. 3 days later I felt a pop and loads of blood, and it started from there. Hopefully you will get a scan tomorrow to confirm that everything is out and you can start to heal.

Lots of love xxx

Just a hug for you hun... Iv been where you are, your heart aches truly aches and you grieve and it takes time for it to get easier and to think of everything without crying but it will come it will become easier. Just take it real slow, make sure you have support for you and Dh. I hope your ok, take care purple

I am so sorry this has happened x

purple so very very sorry you are going through this.... its totally & utterly shit :( I hope you now have someone with you and that you are allowing yourself time to recover and time to grieve.

I can understand how you feel, having suffered an MC at 12 weeks too, in August. Its totally devastating but take comfort from your DD she will keep you sane x

Hi everyone,
Thanks for the lovely messages.

I had my scan this morning which ended up being vaginal as I had shrunk so much, I was a little prepared as I thought it may happen this way.

It kind of helped seeing the blank screen as I knew the baby was really gone, and I was very relieved that I didn't need an op and that I seemed to be healing well.

When I need some time out I come and hideout on the Computer which helps, and I am trying to experience all my emotions as I do not want to be repressing at all.

I think me and DH will be making an entry on the remembrance book, although we do not know what the sex was it may help, if we give our baby a name and have some sort of record, rather than our poor LO being 'Products of conception'.

It was difficult this morning and I hardly slept last night. We had a small wait in a room with a few couple in, they all seemed happy, whereas I was steadily getting miserable knowing what was coming.

We were then called in to a room where we had to give details of what happened which upset me more, it was just simple questions like; 'you experienced bleeding and passing of some clots?' The answer being I was actually pouring with blood and passed 'products' :(
I found that hard, why did they need to ask? They knew they were just checking for an empty womb.

After this we were chucked out in the waiting room again, with me trying not to cry as I knew that would be me howling for ages!

We then had to wait for the scan, while others came out with photos :(

I am so upset and six weeks seems so long to have to wait to even try again. And if the next pregnancy is successful it isn't going to be my second baby, they will be my beloved third! It is as if this one will just be deleted forever just because it 'wasn't meant to be'.
:( :( :(

Oh Purple, what a time of it you have had.

Sometimes it just helps to write down what you have been through and how you felt, just like you have done to get some peace and closure.

Your precious Angel will always be your second loved and longed for child and so writing about them in a remembrance book does help. I didn't know the sex either as i lost ours in the 1st trimester but as the baby had died beginning of the summer we named her Summer as it seemed fitting. We went on to have a beautiful daughter exactly one year later (she was due on the day we lost baby Summer - thankfully she was late) but she will always be our second child and now she is 6 we have told her about our baby that is a star in the sky/Angel in heaven.

Friends said when i fell for DD "oh this is great as you can get over what happened now" oh my god "as if". She will never be forgotten and neither will your Angel either so put your friends straight if they dare voice that. I felt I wasn't allowed to grieve for our lost child as i fell quite quickly and it was to my detriment later on as i fell apart about it several months after DD was born.

You have been so brave and i admire you but don't be too brave purple, let people see you grieve as it was a life however small and let your DH grieve too as people ask how mum is and forget dad in the process.

My thoughts are with you at this time and a hug is winging it's way over to you xx

Please forgive me if this is inappropriate but I am desperate for information. How can you tell the difference between clots and "products of conception" or the sac? I have had three scary days of blood and clots and one of the clots today looked different - darker and more solid.

Hi WW. Not sure if I have the answer but sharing what I've experienced.
First mc at about 6 weeks, I did see clots but nothing recognisable as a sac etc. Lot of blood and clots, over a period of 3 days, that was it.
2nd mc at around 8 weeks, there was heavier blood and clots and then finally (after a different sort of pain) a pregnancy sac, which was brown/red and looked a bit like a short sausage (I'm assuming it started off round but was altered on the way out).
I'm being factual as I think that's what you are looking for. Sorry you are going through this.

Just marking as I would have probably had this baby by now. :(

purple - so sorry, I know what that's like.

Occasionally I allow myself to think I'd have a 15 month old or an 8 month old or a 3 month old by now as a sibling for DS. This week I had a ChemPg, which doesn't compare to the 3 MMCs, but is still a fourth pregnancy not to work out.

It's desperately sad :(. I raise my glass to you.

Oh gosh not you to for a chem pregnancy! I had one last cycle, the main annoying thing was that I didn't even test early! grumble.
I am trying to think positively, that at least I got pregnant but it is hard :(
Thanks for replying and I am sorry for your losses x

So sorry Purple . Just in case anyone else is reading this who is worried about mc - I think it depends on the individual. I have had two miscarriages and I didn't have any pain with either, so it doesn't always have to be terrible. I'm not sure I could have handled pain as well as the feeling of grief - it is a horrible thing to happen.

It has recently being the anniversary of my loss, I still think about what could have been. However, it is much easier to cope with, there is still a place in my heart for this baby and I don't think I will ever forget how upset I was.

If someone reads this and are going through the heartbreaking stage where they don't think they will be normal again, you will, it might take awhile but it won't cause as much pain, although an ache is still present a year on.

Happily I am now expecting again, 17+3 and so far everything looks good, I was terrified to begin with. I have also had to go through some of my feelings in regards to my loss again, however I feel this was healthy.

Thank you to all the people that have offered me support on this thread it really helped me through a really difficult time. Thank you