Am I too old to try again - please be honest x

[georgiepie]

Hi,

I have just had a MMC at the age 41.(9 weeks) I had the ERPC last week and like so many others I feel so sad.

I already have a DD who is 3 and we had been TTC for 18 months. Eventually we tried clomid and IUI and it worked. I really wanted another baby both for myself and DH but also for my DD so she would not be alone when we are really old!

We are thinking of trying again but really dont know if we should just give up as I will be 42 in January and DH is 41. I dont think we would do the IUI again but maybe see what happens naturally.

Please tell me if I am too old to consider TTC again when I will be 42. Maybe I had the MMC because of my age?

If you were or are in the same situation and it worked out that would be nice to know too.

I just dont know what to do....

Thank you

Hi I'm 42 and pregnant - conceived naturally. I do have to say however that this prgnanacy is by far the hardest on my body and in terms of complications i hvae develo0ped. go for it but be under no illusions that it is harder and build in lots of rest time ( even if you think you doh't need or want it ) which was my mistakbe.... good luck!

I second what Lisalisa says - build in lots of rest time. Physically I felt like I was walking through glue for many months, but it was worth it.

cerealqueen sorry to hear your have MCd too. I hope you manage to make the right decision about trying again. If you do, I think the trick is not really to believe the pregnancy test until you are many many weeks in (quite hard when you are busy quaffing folic acid and pregnacare) and expect things to possibly go wrong. I know it sounds pessimistic, but I found it helped to be realistic. Anyway, you're a mere young thing at 42!

One of my colleagues conceived age 41 on a one night very drunken stand (with her ex - father of 1st much older child and still a very good friend).She had had previous fertility issues before their 1st child and I believe had tried later with her 2nd (long gone partner) with no luck.

If it is what you want then keep trying. Bodies are funny things.

I am 44 and naturally 19 wks pg. Started tring for this baby when I was 42, sadly took 2 years and 2 more mc before we were succesful. What I am trying to say is I didn't plan/envisage myself being pregnant at 44 but wasn't ready to give up and nature was obviously happy for us this time.

I have to say, I do feel more tired I think, but that may be as I have 5 other dc's to look after, but I'm a strong believer in if it happens naturally then it was meant to be, going down the assited conception wasn't for us, (although I have no issue with others who do).

Its entirely a personal decision, good luck.

(second/third the forties thred, they're all completely bonkers but lovely too )

Wow Lia66, congratulations! Can I just ask though, assisted conception isn't necessarily a benefit for the over 40s is it? I was led to believe that if you are as old as me (!) then eggs are likely to be damaged whether you fertilise them naturally or through IVF.

OP, we're all too old, too young, too rich, too poor, too alone, too busy, too ambitious, too passive, too anything, too not enough!!

If you want to have a baby and you have enough love to give it, keep trying. You will know when you've had enough trying.

Good luckxxx

Hi mud The cons I saw (for repeated mc) did say as we get older our eggs may not be as good quality as when we were younger. however it only takes one good un as they say.

I am sorry to hear you are miscarrying now, it's shit isn't it, however old you are? :(

I had a fsh test before falling this time which wasn't fab and indicated reduced ovarian reserves, that very same month, got my sticky bfp so there is still hope.

I've had amnio and stuff this time too and all good so fingers crossed for healthy baby in March

Good luck to anyone else trying, I do think that as we get older society kind of expects us to be grateful for what we've got, (and of course we are) but when you have room for just one more it's just the same as when you were trying for your first or if you were 26, (or whatever age, insert preference)

No your not too old I would up your vitamins and don`t forget the mans health in this. I made smooothies with added vitamins which we both drank. It worked on BBC show and did for us. Also I would add that I have a 1 in 2 chance of my baby having fatal disease though 50/ 50 s higher than IVF wich gave me hope.. baby here 100% fine.