Contraception in menopause

[Randomchat]

I'm overwhelmed with hormones and medication and want to stop something.

I've been on hormonal contraception most of my adult life so I've never had reliable periods. For that reason the gp tells me contraception is suggested until age 55. We've also been using condoms for a while because of vaginal dryness.

I'm taking oestrogen gel (horribly allergic to 2 different brands of patch), progestogen pills and a progestogen only contraceptive (have an odd shaped uterus so don't get on with coils). Unrelated, but I've also started medication for glaucoma recently.

I'm considering stopping the hormonal contraceptive and just using condoms. I spoke to the practice nurse today who said that the chances of getting pregnant at 51 are really small but not zero. Properly using condoms massively reduces the risk. So the risk would be tiny.

I want to stop taking it because I'm slightly overwhelmed with the amount of medicines I'm taking. Also the amount of hormones I'm adding to my body for one reason or another. If it's not entirely necessary I'd like to cut it out.

But I've been on hormonal contraception pretty much forever and I feel a bit terrified about stopping, like I'm bound to get pregnant aged 51 the very first time we have sex. Even though we would still use condoms.

I'm also not sure how I would know I was pregnant since I don't have periods. I didn't have many early symptoms when I was pregnant. Should I take a test every month for peace of mind?

I don't know why I've got a bit fixated on this tiny pill. I would actually love to just stop interfering with my hormones altogether and just be however my body is meant to be, but I don't think it would be pretty, based on how I was feeling before starting HRT. So do I stop this one part of my hormone regime? Or will it not make much difference and I should just keep taking it and stop thinking about it so much?

Please talk some sense into me. Thank you

Could you take the combined pill instead of all this? If you have a healthy bodyweight and BP and no health issues or other conditions, I think you can use it til mid 50s?

Hi OP. I didn't use hormonal contraception until I had the coil fitted at 46. We used condoms successfully for 20yrs with two planned pregnancies in the middle.

You will be fine if you use them properly.

Or you can pay privately and have a Mirena fitted under General Anaesthetic.

I can't take the combined pill because of blood clot risk in my wider family. I did for a while when I was younger but not now I'm over 50.

And I've had 2 coils in the past. One fell out and the other caused me pain because it wouldn't stay in place and had to be removed under ga because no-one could remove it otherwise.

So I think my choices are actually fairly limited. I don't know why I've got so bothered by this extra contraceptive pill. It's just one extra tablet to take for a few years. I really want to stop, but after almost 30 years of hormonal contraception I'm blowing the decision out of all proportion and convinced I'll get pregnant.

Nope. 50 is the cut off.

If you have vaginal dryness, you should be using vaginal estrogen, not relying on the lube on condoms. You can use it as well as systemic HRT.

You're right that the risk of pregnancy at 51 is minute and would possibly not go to term anyway.

You can however use a newer type of POP called Slynd that is a contraceptive but also used off-licence as the progesterone part of HRT.

OR you can use 3 x Noriday (daily) as part of HRT, (which is the POP)- maybe you're on it now?

These might be better options.

If your GP isn't up to speed on this, maybe print info off and take it along, or see a private gynae/ GP and get it sorted that way?

Your partner could do his part and just get a vastectomy

A bit late when OP is heading to 52 , to put him through that perhaps?

Thats sad, i read advice from the US from the menopause society and a leading doctor out there that it can be used longer, but only if youre healthy, no issues, non smoker etc. But yea, seems like its a hard cut off here. Feels unfair.

We've got a strong family history of blood clotting so maybe a different person would be allowed to take it post 50.

I've just for some unknown reason got fixated on whether to keep taking the contraceptive along with everything else or switch to condoms and take one less thing. I can't decide if it will make any difference either way. I don't think anyone on here can make that decision for me. I need to just stop going on about it and decide.

What they do in the US is not the same as the UK.

Exactly, I’m sittting here incredulous that women of 50 plus is still picking up all the lifting for contraception

unless she doesn’t have partner and sees lots of toy boys of course! 😱🤣

How long does it take for the dryness to stop if you do use vaginal oestrogen?

If you came off the contraception, presumably you would have periods though? When you stop having them I guess you might wonder if it’s menopause or a baby, as women have since the dawn of time, but with condoms you should be fine!

Unsure as to why your partner didn't get a vaesectomy? That's exactly what my husband did after we had our daughter together (his only bio child). I was 40 so not a chance I was going to endure the pill for another decade plus!!

@JinglingSpringbells Puthim through what? A quick and simple procedure?

We’ve used condoms for about 17/18 years, only got pregnant the one time we didn’t & I was 30!
we use lube as well, as long as you’re both careful they are very reliable (I’m sure I’ve read that a lot of the accidents are user error

@Cheeseandolivesplease If it was that simple, all men would have it done. And most don't.
It's irreversible and I do know a few men who have had second families in their 50s when their circumstances have changed. It's a highly personal decision.

Please accept the statement of the obvious award 😄. Yes, correct, they do.

if you're happy using condoms I'd stick to those and come off the progesterone pill. As you say, at your age the chances of becoming pregnant are slim even if it breaks. not going to lie, we've had days when we don't even bother using one given how low the risks are, and touch wood, ok so far!

If the combined pill were a suitable alternative surely no one under 50 would be on hrt?

The combined pill is not the equivalent of HRT- they contain different hormones.

It was mentioned above as an alternative source of oestrogen and progesterone

@JinglingSpringbells It really is a very quick and simple procedure; most men don't have it done because of misogynistic thinking.
Tbh I'd have thought my husband was a completely selfish arse if he hadn't had one after the birth of our daughter. And absolutely, had he been selfish enough to make that choice simply "because he might want another family in his 50s." Leave the door open? Absolutely mate - so I can throw you out of it!! 🤣
I wouldn't stay married to any man who cited this as a valid reason. And there absolutely would have been no further intimacy whilst waiting for the divorce!!
No idea why women put up with this type of entitled crap from their partners!

Ive never heard of a vasectomy being described as complex surgery. I have heard it described as a simple procedure, most men don't have it due to selfishness.

I didn't say it was complex surgery. Men do have to undergo some counselling before making the decision so they understand the outcome.
It is irreversible and many men don't want to do that.
Mine didn't in case I died or we divorced and he wanted more children.
Many men feel like that.

Anyway- it's not relevant as the OP isn't talking about it.