Menopause/anxiety or something else

[rolandsrat]

I am looking for some help/guidance on my feelings at the moment.

I have always had the habit of over analysing some simple things, example being making a mistake at work, owning up and mentally going down the route of a warning type thing or I have left a heater on by accident and what happens if there is a fire or worrying that I have left a tap running. Insignificant things but they worry me and often cause a sleepless night when my worries grow arms and legs. This doesn’t happen often, just very occasionally. I wake the next day tired but also calling myself a stupid old bat for such insignificant and silly issues. I get to work and absolutely nothing has happened. Its almost like I think about the worst possible outcome, give myself absolute torture over it so subconsciously I know, in the morning all will be fine. I sound really stupid here but before I leave work each day I always double check my heater in my room and the kitchen tap. This checking is a new thing. I don't do it at home, never have.

My main concern is that this has really ramped up in recent months. DS has an accident away from home a couple of weeks ago in Manchester. We are North of Scotland. We didn't need to go as coaches and staff were looking after him. He was checked at minor injuries and came home. We had him checked out the next day. He is absolutely fine but my mind absolutely tore me to bits over what ifs. There has also been another issue this week regarding his sport. Its been a complete misunderstanding on other people's part, not mine and it is all sorted now but last night the torment kicked in again. This is happening more and more. Really silly things and I can't seem to stop my brain from doing what it is doing. I am exhausted this morning and on the verge of tears with knots in my stomach yet there is nothing wrong.

Just by comparison, a lorry crashed into our garden in the Spring. It caused tens of thousands of pounds worth of damage and has taken months to sort out and has at times been very stressful. This has given me none of the thoughts I have above.

I am 54. This could well be Menopause. I had a hysterectomy 10 years ago but left my ovaries. I haven't taken HRT as I suffer badly with migraines. Beyond what I have said above, I don't feel the need for it. I don't even know if both are connected and I certainly don't want to see the GP for them just to say it is menopause and give me HRT to get me out the door.

Could this be anxiety. If it is, how do I/can I control it. It is really wearing me down at the moment.

This current episode could be gone tomorrow and I won't have another for weeks.

any thoughts or help is very welcome. Thank you.

You poor thing, Yes, it sounds like the generalised anxiety you've always suffered from, which has ramped up possibly along with menopause, but also perhaps as a longer-term after-effect of both the 'bigger' anxiety-inducing incidents, the most recent being your DS's accident, so do be kind to yourself, it's not abnormal at all to be "what if" in that kind of situation. it's like your brain is still in 'disaster' mode. I'm the same age as you and haven't suffered with menopause-induced anxiety despite being a low level worrier all my life, though I have a formerly confident friend who absolutely did out of nowhere, like a complete personality transplant, no other external reason.

My mother, on the other hand, has always been like you're describing, catastrophising on much smaller things and being seemingly unable to calm herself down, and has got much worse as she's got older (now in her 70s) . I think it sounds more like the latter, tbh, than menopause per se, along with the natural response to the "big" events.

I believe CBT and other similar techniques can help your thought processes, and I think you might want to talk to your GP, because your stomach being in knots with anxiety all day is really NOT something you want to put up with long term.