The user name says it all really

[Periandpregnant]

Hello all,
I’m posting as I really need to share and I’m hoping I’ll find others who have been in a similar situation.

Im 44 years old and have been in Peri (self diagnosed of course) for the last 12+ months.
Life's been pretty miserable actually, all the usual things I’m sure you’ll be well aware of.
I had a doctors appointment about a month ago to start the process of HRT.
I haven’t started it yet as I was waiting on a period to get a final set of blood tests.

Well of course my period never arrived which I thought nothing of as it’s been getting more and more irregular.

I had been growing more and more sensitive to my husbands smell and then it hit me that that was my last pregnancy symptom, so I did a test 3 days ago and sure enough - a blazing positive, so strong it hardly let any dye travel past the test line.
I have no real idea how pregnant I am other than I am reasonably sure it’s less than 3 months.

I don’t know what to do

Just needed to let it all out in a safe space

Wow, are you doing ok today? I'm not sure how to respond because I'm not sure how you're feeling but thinking of you x

Get to a GP and find out how pregnant you are as a first step. You found out 3 days ago: start moving on this right now. When you have more information you can organise options and thoughts better and think about what it means and what your next steps are. I feel for you OP. Have you told your H?

GP can't tell you how pregnant you are, early pregnancy unit needed!

I'm your age and can't imagine what a shock this must be! Do you have kids?

When I've I've wondered about peri to GPs they always say that 44 would be pretty young for actual menopause. Definitely best to assume you're fertile if unsure and you don't want a pregnancy - unhelpful to you, I know!
You know you have options

What a shock OP, hard to know how to respond to comfort you. You aren’t the first person this has happened to, my friend who is a doctor herself had the same problem age 48. Hope you find a solution you’re happy with.

How many children do you have, any young ones, how are you feeling about this pregnancy? Bet your head is all over the place. See your GP and get a scan booked and take it from there. what ever happens I wish you the best 🙏❤️

Thank you for all the supportive comments everyone.
Im feeling a bit calmer now and my brain has kicked into logistics mode.

To answer some of the questions …

Yes I immediately told my husband. He’s absolutely supportive of whatever I choose to do (he’s incredible) BUT I know he would prefer we keep it.
He is 37 & a nationality where big families are the norm.

We have 2 kids already, one from my first marriage (14) and a 3 year old together. That’s probably an important factor as it’s not like I haven’t done it relatively recently.

But, since our toddler started preschool I’ve thrown myself into my small business and the last 12 months have been all about growing this for the sake of our families future.
My husband is not a high earner - we can’t live off his income alone and amazingly my business has started doing really well.
I can’t really see a way of continuing it successfully as it mainly revolves around me and hiring someone to replace me wouldn’t really be an option (my clients book primarily because of me & my involvement in their event)

Ive got a scan booked for tomorrow to see how far along I am and if it’s even a viable pregnancy. If it isn't, I will feel a huge sense of relief to have that decision taken away from me.

I also worry as the last wee while has been so challenging for myself and my husband as peri turned me into a husk of the woman I once was…we didn’t fight or anything but I just don’t have ANY energy within me to give to him.
I just want to be left alone most of the time.
I worry that bringing a newborn into that - when I haven’t even managed to find my feet when it comes to my hormones - will break me.
Prior to finding out I’m pregnant, I’ve had extreme brain fog, exhaustion, short tempered, bad sleep etc… I was pinning all my hopes on HRT ‘fixing’ me.
Lord knows what my hormones will be like if this continues.

anyway, I’m feeling better having shared here. Thank you again for being a safe space to let me unload