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Menopause

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Early menopause at 41-42

11 replies

Zenlifeforme · 19/07/2025 10:10

Hi

wondered if there is a current thread for talk and support around early menopause?

I feel alone in my experiences since most women around me aren’t going through it. I feel this sense of unfairness too. I am hoping I can flip it somehow.

OP posts:
Nevertrustacop · 19/07/2025 18:28
  1. Done and dusted. I don't have much to say about it as it wasn't really talked about back in the day, but if anything I was pleased to be done with periods. 63 now and by far the healthiest of my similarly aged friends. No osteoporosis, slim, not a single grey hair, all my own teeth! Mum was the same and still pretty much firing on all (well most!) cylinders aged 88. No hrt. No treatment at all. It needn't be the end of the world.
JinglingSpringbells · 19/07/2025 18:43

Zenlifeforme · 19/07/2025 10:10

Hi

wondered if there is a current thread for talk and support around early menopause?

I feel alone in my experiences since most women around me aren’t going through it. I feel this sense of unfairness too. I am hoping I can flip it somehow.

The Daisy Network is a national charity and has a forum (but I think you have to pay a sub to access the whole site.) They have local groups, too. www.daisynetwork.org/

You can access the medical info on the site anyway.

Are you now post menopause (ie your periods have stopped for good?)
If they have, presumably your GP knows and has offered HRT which is the standard medically advised treatment, to prevent osteoporosis and heart disease?

stichguru · 19/07/2025 19:09

I'm 43 and going though it.

shellyleppard · 19/07/2025 19:16

56 and now post menopausal. It took over 10 years of peri menopause but stopped by itself. No hrt, couldn't get on with it

Crazymayfly · 19/07/2025 19:23

I went through it in my thirties. Awful time. Now early forties and post MP. On HRT as wasn’t given that until post MP. A lot of my same aged friends haven’t even entered Peri yet. I struggled finding support as everyone at GPs said it was not happening (a new doctor spotted it when he started there and I was literally on my arse from a mental health pov) and I’m so glad I met him.

sunshinechaser · 20/07/2025 09:27

I was peri menopausal around age 40 but didn’t manage to get on HRT until I was 43. I know what you mean that’s it’s an isolating experience. I felt old before my time and embarrassed that I had to take HRT when none of my friends knew much about it and had’t started it yet. I didn’t tell any of my friends until they started HRT in their late 40s/early 50s.
The most important thing you can do is get on HRT to protect your body from the decade long lack of oestrogen compared to the average woman. I also think younger women need higher doses of HRT to compensate.

Zenlifeforme · 20/07/2025 10:22

Thanks all.

yes I’m on hrt (patches and mirena coil). I’m well read and researched on all of that and proactive with my health. I had a DXA scan the other day too (lucky postcode lottery wise).

my periods stopped 6 months ago. Prior to then and for about a year I might have had a 40 or 50 day cycle some months but I always had something. But the last 6 months nothing. Even if this isn’t the end end it feels pretty final. My mums stopped at 40.

It’s just that, the finality of it all, the perimenopause started only a year ago, and it’s likely I’ll be through it all in 6 more months time. I should be grateful it’s been so swift, and relatively straight forward shouldnt I 😭.

Similar aged women talking about husband having to have vasectomies etc and oh no I couldn’t have another child. Obviously the coil is contraceptive (and why I started on firstly) and we decided (very shortly) before my menopause that we were happy with 2 children (which I feel so damn lucky and grateful especially considering this is happening now). But those decisions and that stage has passed me by more or less now. I actually mourn not having a period. The dog eared pantyliners in my bag, the period knickers for those unexpected moments, now all bundled in a bag. I thought this stage would go on a little longer than a few months. I guess I’m just a bit sad and mixed up. Perimenopause can be a long stage of getting to grips with this loss but for me it’s just been heaped on me in one go.

Yes re higher doses, I do worry I’m on the right dose of estrogen, as a previous poster said. I only take 50mg but it stops the flushes and I feel ok generally. I did try 75mg as thought more is better but I got uncontrollable rage and ChatGPT said it could be eatrogen dominance so I trialed back to 50mg and I’ve been fine. (I don’t fancy progesterone pills as I’ve heard bad things). Dr Newson says if your estrogen dose doesn’t stop the symptoms and flushes then you need a higher dose. But mine does, I generally feel ok.

I get mild brain fog. I have been diagnosed with a mental health condition 2 years ago (which my mum also has). The medication I’m on is sedating and it helps me sleep. Without it I sleep incredulity lightly and don’t manage to get off to sleep for ages. I put this down to the stimulating home life with 2 small children, but then could it mean I need higher estrogen 🤷🏼‍♀️ , and the medication is masking this symptom 🤷🏼‍♀️ . Dr Newson also mentioned testosterone needs but we just aren’t there as a society yet with understanding so I guess that’s one the next generation will benefit from and we won’t. (I don’t wanna go private and faff about when I’m doing pretty well on what I’m on).

I’ll check out the daisy place. I’ve also researched fiction books to read about menopause, touching souls in that way usually helps me.

I’m sure I’ll snap out of it soon.

Thank you mumsnetters

OP posts:
Emerald13 · 22/07/2025 15:31

Hi! T I was so the same place at 42, 7 years ago and I am still on hrt.

Plantladylover · 22/07/2025 15:32

I was 38, trying to conceive another child. had tests was told I'd never conceive naturally as FSH levels so low and they diagnosed menopause. AMA, happy to help.

51 now still on HRT. It seems a blessing now not having had a period for over 10 years. Plus all is good and friends of similar age starting to go through it now.

At least people are talking about it now. Even 10/15 years ago hardly anyone spoke of it.

sunsetbridges · 30/07/2025 10:01

41 and going through it, been awful, anyone still here?

Emerald13 · 30/07/2025 14:59

I was at the same place 7 years ago. I am on hrt and feel better😘

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