What symptom of meno really surprised you?

[menopausalfart]

I've had most symptoms associated with perimenopause, including some really nasty ones.
The symptom that surprised me the most was the memory loss. If I don't do something the moment it enters my brain, it's gone.
I've been taking HRT, vitamins, collagen, and I exercise regularly. This symptom, along with anxiety, has stubbornly persisted.

F

In my younger days I thought perimenopause was just hot flushes and night sweats! I haven't had either of those, but was surprised by the palpitations, anxiety, brain fog, rage, vertigo, itching, aura migraines and digestive issues.
Oh and top of the list of shitness; insomnia. Horrid, debilitating, insomnia. Had bouts of it in my 30s but it ramped up a gear when peri started. I literally can't remember the last time I went more than 5 hours without waking up in the night.

Anxiety 😥 so bad

Really bad sinus issues.
Really sweaty and stinky (guess that's not that weird)
Bad temperature regulation
Brain fog, messing up words in speech.
Stomach and bowel issues
Lump in breast, hoping not cancer.
Exhaustion
Really heavy period (not had them for years but now heavy but very sporadic)

@ForeverDelayedEpiphany Mitchum is the one I use. I have no idea why roll-on works better, but it does.

I worry about this. My (male) line manager is a bit about the way I have to look at things I've written down rather than just tell him from memory. I'd never pass an exam these days. By far the worst thing though is the shrivelling down below. Everything just shrinks.

A watery discharge can be common for many women with vaginal atrophy, however a shock when it happens. My main symptom was needing to wee all the time, and finding it frustrating when only a teaspoonful came out. Check out the GSM symptom checker on page 14.
https://menopausesupport.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/MEN0921351544-005_Menopause-Support-Booklet-5-3.pdf

Anxiety
Insomnia
Aching body
Looking old
No motivation
No sex drive

Cant take HRT so have to plod on.....

The one that surprised me - restless legs - have had this since I was a teenager but usually only in the summer or when very tired. Now it's way more frequent and drives me nuts at times. The only thing that helps is getting out of bed and doing squats, which is no fun when you're half asleep.

It all sounds dreadful, hats off to all of you who hold down a job and carry on with parenting and life with gestures vaguely that going on 💐

Are there women who go through it unscathed? It’s not come for me yet but I’m scared 😱

It's been 11 years since my last period, but I particularly remember the word fug. Like, I'd mean to say e.g. "I'll just fetch a knife", but would say, "I'll just fetch a tree", or "I need a pen" would come out as "I need a frog" or something equally absurd. I thought I was losing it many a time.

Mine was pain. I had no idea that the chronic pain and fatigue I was living with were peri menopause symptoms. I lived with intense hip and back pain, and plantar fasciitis and was unable to work more than 2-3 days a week as I was unable to stand for very long and had to sleep on my days off. Diagnosed with fibromyalgia until I went to a private gp and listed all my symptoms and she said "let's try HRT" I'm not exaggerating when I say it changed my life within a week!

Absolutely this. The only positive.

@YourKindPeachMaker My mum had hardly any symptoms. Lots of people sail through it.

Constant hot flushes, lucky if I went a couple of hours without having one. This lasted around ten years, but I didn't take HRT which I probably should have.

Very watery eyes, like pouring down my face. Apparently this was due to my eyes being too dry and overcompensating by producing tears all the time. It did stop after a while, thankfully.

My teeth seem to be on the move. I am constantly flossing; the most random things go into places that weren’t gaps before.
Also bad dreams. I had everything out surgically which was a bit of an upheaval, followed by months of nightly terrifying nightmares.

The memory loss ones remind me of a time I was driving and started panicking as I couldn't remember what to do next! (Indicate, I needed to indicate!)

Terrifying!

Might be worth an eye check. About two years ago I had a spontaneous retinal tear (due to eyes drying up) it doesn’t hurt but it’s very alarming and requires urgent treatment

Dry, sore gums and the itchiness! also the fatigue - I have been overweight for a long time but have always done exercise classes/gum/swimming. There are days now I can barely drag myself of the sofa.

This intermittent surge has remained with me & I'm over 60. No atrophy,no dryness. Lots of common symptoms during peri some of which have remained. The latter is the part that surprises me. I just don't understand it cause according to experts this doesn't appear to be common,in fact it's meant to be the opposite. 🤔

Omg! Finally I’ve read others have this too. I would get wet knickers/leggings when wearing a tampon, not blood but clear fluid. No doctor could help me. I don’t wear tampons anymore and it’s stopped, so I assumed it was a new allergy to whatever they put in tampons these days

I so wish I was someone who isn't affected by horrible hormones. I am so sensitive to anything hormonal, and other innocuous substances/medication too since being injured permanently by an off label antipsychotic prescribed after my head injury. I have a movement disorder now so anything perimenopausal is the bloody icing on the cake 😳😭🙈

Oh to be healthy... 😭😞

crippling imposter syndrome…like mini-psychotic episodes, I imagine, I’m convinced I will be arrested for ‘posing’ as a professional HCW. Has only happened a couple of times but terrified me.

HRT has helped but I wish I could find someone who gives an iota of a shit about my dose regimen and could properly tailor it for me.
If anyone can recommend a clinic - maybe a Louise newson one? I would happily pay for an expert to customise my regime of hormones properly.

You know what? It’s absolutely nuts that there are so many symptoms we’re not told about. Women have existed for thousands upon thousands of years, yet in 2025 we’re still sharing knowledge for many of us, is a revelation- it really shouldn’t be.

It was the same with pregnancy and childbirth for me. I got preeclampsia and in spite of being a generally well informed and studious person there was virtually nothing in the major books at the time.

I had terrible heavy periods though out my menstrual ‘lifespan’, three miscarriages before having my children, and fibroids that resulted in me needing a hysterectomy. I didn’t know any of that was not normal until the fibroids. I thought it was just something that women had to bear.

It’s a damning indictment of the state of women’s healthcare. The vast majority of medicine is optimised for men. This has to change. We really do need to be much better informed about our own menstrual health and wellbeing. We need to understand our bodies, and we need to break down stigma and taboo so conversations about menstrual health are normal and not some dirty secret. Women’s menstrual and reproductive health, and everything that goes with that, matters.