Anxiety - perimenopause?

[ToothHurtyAppointment]

I’ll keep it short:
I am 39. Periods have become lighter and more spaced apart. Hot flushes, insomnia, lower libido. I’ve also developed crippling anxiety. I’ve always been anxious but have masked it really well, nobody in the world knows. But over the last few months it’s got significantly worse. It’s keeping me up at night, affecting my work and social life. This has impacted my mood, which is now frequently low and I’ve become snappy. I’m also really forgetful and suffering with brain fog etc.

I got a Telehealth appointment today because I really, really need help with the anxiety now which is taking over my life. I was totally fobbed off to download an app to practice breathing. Why isn’t women’s health taken seriously? I’ve done breathing exercises my entire life, I need help.

The doctor wants to do some sort of blood test during my next period where the ovaries are stimulated to determine their health and what hormones are up to, which is great, but I don’t care about that right now, I care that my life is falling to fucking pieces because I’m either too low, anxious or have my head in a cloud.

Sorry I’m venting, just letting it out while I have a little cry. I know for sure I should have spent the majority of my life on antidepressants but I’ve always been too scared to reach out and ask for help, just ensuring the outside world thinks I’m okay. I put my big girl pants on today and I feel so deflated. :-(

My anxiety got really bad when peri started, to the point I started having panic attacks. I had to get onto Fluoxetine and Propranolol, which have helped me tremendously. I’m not on HRT though so perhaps people with anxiety and on HRT can report how it has helped them.

HRT has made a huge difference to all my symptoms, particularly the anxiety. In retrospect I first started feeling that when I was about way about 39 but I wasn’t prescribed HRT until I was 43 when I explained I was concerned about early menopause and I wanted to ensure I was protected from osteoporosis. This triggered a referral to a clinic and although my blood tests were inconclusive, the gynaecologist was happy to prescribe HRT based on symptoms. For me, it was the progesterone part that helped with anxiety (Mirena coil) so it may be worth thinking about if you would be willing to try this ‘for contraception’ while you wait. The oestrogen has helped with energy, hot flushes, libido, low mood and brain fog.

I feel for you as it’s so debilitating to have these symptoms. While the lifestyle changes I made (yoga, sleep hygiene, cbt, no/low alcohol, eating well etc) helped and are good in general, the HRT made the most dramatic difference for me.

I was really hoping for an empathetic doctor who’d prescribe me SSRIs, but all I got was an app for breathing. It really took so much for me to reach out so I feel so deflated. I have panic attacks too which are a whole new thing for me. I don’t know where to turn now.

I do everything right. I run for 45 mins every morning, I don’t touch alcohol or smoke or drugs, I am active, healthy, eat well and am well hydrated… I just wish I felt heard today instead of fobbed off.

Thank you for this. I’ve had the mirena before and it turned me into a feral ratbag, otherwise that would have been such a helpful suggestion, especially if someone in the future is in my shoes and reads this. I’m so glad HRT has helped you so much.

I’m sorry they didn’t help you. I’ll tell you what I did and hope it works for you as well to get them to take you seriously.

I was fobbed off initially and then I really went to town on the form with all of my symptoms, not sugar coated at all, and ended up with a same day appointment (it was going to be in 6-8 weeks otherwise). I firmly insisted to be put on meds as I was not coping at all. In my case in the past I was on Sertraline for anxiety which didn’t help so I stopped taking that and hadn’t been on anything for the past two years, still had anxiety but the peri turned it into panic attack level. She prescribed me Fluoxetine which is much better for me personally. She also prescribed me the Propranolol to help with panic attacks, which I can take 3x a day if needed.

I would suggest writing down all of your symptoms when you have panic attacks so that you can advocate strongly for yourself with the GP. I would also suggest saying you have struggled with lifelong anxiety but was scared to try SSRI’s, but you’ve reached a breaking point and really need the help of medications as other self-help methods are not working for you to relieve the anxiety and panic attacks. Emphasise that you are not coping and are struggling with work and home life. You could mention you know someone with a similar situation who went on SSRIs + Propranolol and it really helped them, so you wanted to give it a shot as well and see if it helps you.

I do want to mention my sleep is still crap, due to peri. I wake up in the middle of the night for hours and probably only HRT would help with that. But I don’t lay awake with anxiety at least 😹

Information on panic attacks which might help you to explain what you’re going through with the GP. This info helped me to put into words what I was experiencing as the brain fog and forgetfulness was terrible. Good luck! Don’t give up 💐

Panic attacks are sudden, intense episodes of fear or discomfort that can occur without warning. Symptoms of a panic attack may include:

1. Physical Symptoms:
• Rapid heartbeat (palpitations)
• Sweating
• Trembling or shaking
• Shortness of breath or feeling smothered
• Feelings of choking
• Chest pain or discomfort
• Dizziness, lightheadedness, or feeling faint
• Chills or hot flashes
• Nausea or abdominal distress
• Numbness or tingling sensations

2. Psychological Symptoms:
• Feelings of unreality or detachment from oneself (derealization or depersonalization)
• Fear of losing control or “going crazy”
• Fear of dying
• A sense of impending doom

Panic attacks typically reach their peak within minutes and usually last between 5 to 20 minutes, although the feelings of anxiety can linger afterward.