Fear of driving

[Hatenewyear]

I've driven all of my adult life. Living in a different part of the country to my family, long drives were a big part of my life. I whizzed around the country without giving it a second thought.

The last couple of years I've noticed I've become more fearful of traffic. It started with not really liking the fast lane on a motorway, then not liking bridges, and it's getting worse.

I now actively avoid the dual carriageway if I can. I struggle to drive across the bridge to see friends. DH drove to see my family at Christmas and I had to close my eyes when he was driving in the fast lane on the M5 near Bristol where there's a huge drop on the other side of the crash barrier. It's getting ridiculous and very debilitating.

I am menopausal and this fear started around the same time as my symptoms started to appear. I'm on HRT but it's made no difference to this fear.

Does anyone have any experience of the same thing? Any solutions?

Thank you.

Yes, I went through this.

If it helps, I have come out the other side and happy to drive now as I was before.

One of my neighbours is exactly the same, I’d never have believed it. She is so sociable, intelligent, looks absolutely amazing at 70, and yet no longer drives due to the menopause. She still takes estrogen, if she stops the anxiety takes over in all aspects of her life.

I’m fortunate that at 56 and taking HRT I haven’t lost the confidence to drive, and I’m so grateful for it. I’ve never liked motorways so no change there. I would never have believed that the menopause could do this to you, it’s really hideous when you think about it. Aren’t men lucky not having to suffer with this shit.

I can relate totally to this. 10 yrs ago I would drive anywhere, motorways the lot. Now at 55 (even with HRt) I struggle to drive 2 miles down the road, & stress about it for days beforehand.
If I can persuade myself to drive somewhere I panic about parking,& then I panic about driving home. I have had refresher lessons to n9 avail & now I actively avoid driving & would quite happily never drive again.
My spatial awareness has gone, along with quick reflexes any decision making. I become so hyper vigiliant that I get even more anxious.
My childrens friends are all passing their tests now & I feel such a failure that they can drive & I can't.
I wish I knew the answer or could wave a magic wand & restore myself, but I cant & now accept it.
All those people who say "just go out & do it" I don't think they understand how great the fear of crashing and the fear of all the unpredictability of it all is.

Oh god I’ve so had this! Almost overnight, fear of overtaking on mway. Was sort of triggered on a wet night when I got pulled out on by a big lorry but def mainly hormone related. Was also previously a very confident driver all over the place. But it passed also very suddenly- no idea why, so no helpful solutions other than take it easy and try not to avoid driving as ime that made it worse. I’m pretty fine now. 51.

I never enjoyed driving, but I liked the independence. Now in my early 60's and its got much worse since someone hit us when my DH was driving. I could see it happening, although my DH was sounding his horn the other vehicle still hit us. Not a huge amount of damage - no one was hurt, but I now expect other vehicles to pull into the side of the car when they are driving along side or pull out of a junction into our car. Tried hypnotherapy but it hasn't helped unfortunately. I will only drive locally and hate long journeys. Im fine in buses or coaches though, don't feel vulnerable.

Another one here!
Nearly 10 years ago at the age of 49 I had a panic attack whilst driving on a motorway. At the time I thought I was having a stroke or heart attack as I'd never suffered from panic attacks or anxiety before. I haven't driven on a motorway since nor long dual carriageways. At the time it happened I couldn't even look at the car on the drive without panic symptoms starting up again. Tried Propranolol and CBT but neither worked. As someone who had been driving for over 30 years, accident free, driven all over the country and abroad, it was most bizarre and very difficult to come to terms with. My GP never suggested it could be linked to the menopause.

Mine was triggered by a motorway accident on a bridge (that I did not cause btw). I struggled on in the months following, through necessity, but had a panic attack I managed to conceal from passengers (the first time) on another steep incline.
It happened again, stuck in a queue, on a hill. Insurers had referred me for CBT. It never occurred to me that it might be connected to menopause. I’m a TERRIBLE passenger. Sympathies to everyone here.