Feeling hopeless

[BeverlyGoldbergsJumper]

I had a hysterectomy 4yrs ago, they left my ovaries in so I didn’t plunge straight into menopause, however this past year has been the worst of my life. I’m miserable, constantly depressed, just can’t seem to see the upside of anything. I’m exhausted. I’ve put on 3 stone. I don’t even recognise myself and yet I can’t seem to do anything about any of it.
After bloods the doctors said I’m in menopause, but they said I can’t have hrt as contains oestrogen, and I’ve had so many pre cancerous and growths so it’s too risky.
They offered me an antidepressant but that’s associated with weight gain and I can’t bear the thought of being any bigger than the obese I already am.
Now to top it all I have a rectocele prolapse, which they said is due to lack of oestrogen.
I have to wait months to see anyone about it.
I’m constantly uncomfortable, constantly sad, also angry, I feel hopeless.
Truthfully I just feel like I’ve been left to get on with it, and thrown some antidepressants.
I would do anything to help myself, yet I don’t really know how to start, any friends on hrt and seem to be happily living their lives, and anything I’ve read starts with ‘take hrt’.
I’m just at a loss.
Thankyou if you’ve read this far, and please if you have any advice or recommendations I’d be grateful!

This sounds terrible. One option in the short term might be to try herbal supplements? My old doctor was anti HRT so for a couple of years I was on Menopace plus and they definitely helped a bit.

But I think what would really help is to get your doctors to give to a referral to a specialist, or even get a private appointment? It took me a lot of trying to get to see a menopause specialist but she was brilliant.

It sounds like you need tailored advice from a real expert rather than a GP.

Best of luck, there must be other options that could make a big difference for you.

@heathspeedwell thankyou, I will look into Menopace, it’s always good to hear that something has actually made a difference to someone, not just google!
I think you’re right that I need to look at seeing a specialist.
I’m not really in a position to do so, but it’s clear that the NHS aren’t going to be seeing me for some months, and I can’t just go on like this. Thankyou

Gould you not ask your Gp to refer you to an NHS menopause specialist? might be a wait but you wouldn’t have to pay. Big hugs x

It took me over a year to get an appointment with a specialist but I think as you are having such a difficult time then you have a very good case to get fast tracked.

In my case the Consultant recommended that I take a tiny amount of testosterone alongside my HRT medication. I just mention this because there are things other than oestrogen that might help you. It has given me so much zing my sister decided to try it too. She got a private appointment and was given it a week later and now she's really got so much more energy and va va voom.

I think you should go to your GP and really explain in good detail what a difficult time you are having and ask for a referral asap. We women are trained all our lives not to make a fuss, but I think you absolutely deserve to be seen quickly.

@Christine0708 my doctors are next to useless sadly, and any questions I tried to ask about further help were just met with ‘it’s a long long list’! Thankyou x

@heathspeedwell this is what I thought, that there are other things I could take. It took me ages to feel like I could speak to a doctor about it, and when I did I must admit I felt pretty dismissed. And that’s the problem isn’t it!
I feel so completely ‘not myself’ and just trying to explain that and be heard is hard enough, never mind the physical aspect.
But it’s so good to hear that other things have worked for you and for your sister, I’m looking into a private appt now. I appreciate the info, Thankyou x