Is this perimenopause hell?

[AnxieteaAndBiscuits]

I'm 43 y/o mum of 2 (7 and 12). For the last 3 years I've been off birth control and was warned that I may notice PMS symptoms that I hadn't before. My periods are still regular (24/28 days). Theyre fairly light but are so much more painful. I get sore breasts from mid cycle onwards. My anxiety increased, I've gained an enormous amount of weight.... but over the last 18 months things have gotten worse. My anxiety is awful... I'm worrying over tiniest ache or pain, I'm preoccupied with the thought of being ill (I know it's health anxiety but I never had it before). I'm sweating excessively - especially when going from one temperature to another, I'm tearful, my joints hurt (the knee pain is excruciating), heart palpitations, acid reflux, IBS.
I have recently looked at everything from PMDD to fibromyalgia but realistically I think it's menopause. I did an online request earlier for a GP consultation. I was thinking to increase my sertraline (I currently take 50mg) and possibly take a progesterone only pill. My mum and her sister have a history of breast cancer and I'm reluctant to try the combined pill or HRT for this reason.

I'm not sure why I'm posting. Just looking for similar experiences and advice regarding hormone therapy. I don't recognise myself just lately. I had a panic attack this morning while walking back from the school run. It came out of nowhere and I feel like I can't go on like this much longer.

Sorry for the long post

Sounds like perimenopause to me. I had all the symptoms you describe. Things like heart palpitations really fed into my health anxiety as well.
HRT has helped me a little, but I think just recognising that there’s a reason for it all can help mentally.
I’m no HRT expert but I think there are options available that take breast cancer into account.
My GP surgery has appointments available with a remote menopause specialist. Might be worth speaking to your GP.

Thanks @Helenahandkart. I feel so lost at the moment. I could actually sit here and cry right now. I never used to be like this.

My doctors surgery did send me a HRT/menopause questionnaire to fill in online earlier so im hoping for a call back tomorrow. Anything would be better than how I'm feeling right now. Bizarrely I feel great when I'm on my period - I feel physically great and mentally well. By day 9 of my cycle I'm like this and I can't wait for the calmness of my AF!!

Hi Op, I think it sounds like perimemopause as well. The symptom checker questionnaire is useful. It's thorough. I can relate to palpitations. And I get sore elbows sometimes. My periods went crazy so that's what prompted me to go to the doctor. I hope you can get an appointment with a sympathetic GP and check out some options. Take care.

@BarrysTeaForMe Thank you. My periods are pretty regular although more painful. They're lighter and shorter.
The palpitations are horrible and so scary at times. I've cut down my caffeine intake to see if this helps.

I also cut down caffeine to help with the palpitations. It didn’t make any difference though. Mine were so bad (+chest pain) that I went and got an ecg, a chest x-ray and an examination. The doctor couldn’t find anything wrong, but never mentioned to me that it could be menopause related.

@AnxieteaAndBiscuits They are scary. I had them again recently when my dose of oestrogen needed tweaking. I was sitting down and relaxed at the time and it was very weird.

My periods became heavier and more painful and the timing erratic. All over the place. I got the mirena first and added in oestrogel a few months later when the other symptoms kicked in. I noticed a difference in about four weeks on oestrogel. The mirena took about three or four months to settle but it has been brilliant. No more periods.

@Helenahandkart yep - makes no difference to mine either whether I have caffeine or not! It's crazy how these things aren't attributed to the menopause. Last year I was very (un)helpfully diagnosed as a hypochondriac - this really puts me off seeking help from doctors. But, I really can't carry on like this - it's really impacting my daily life.

@BarrysTeaForMe I'm glad you got things sorted. Have all your peri symptoms improved?

@AnxieteaAndBiscuits my symptoms were on the lower end of the scale but yes, I've found it all cleared up and I was back to feeling like myself in very little time. Just in the past four weeks I noticed a couple of things creeping back in (palpitations and sore elbows). I have gone from one to two pumps of gel. There is new packaging for oestrogel which seems to dispense less gel although my GP doesn't think it's different. I've gone up to two pumps which is a standard dose for my age (I'm nearly fifty. Next month).

And dry eyes is another symptom. I have had that for longer so I don't tend to think of it with the other ones. I would be lost without my eye drops.

@BarrysTeaForMe interesting that you mentioned your eyes. I get dry eyes too and really blurry vision (especially in the mornings). Ive gone from not needing glasses to having a new glasses prescription every year for the past 3 years!

And sensitivity to sunlight too.

I found that I was going to the doctor/dentist/optician about lots of different things all the time, but no one ever said that everything could be attributed to perimenopause, so yes, there was an assumption that I was a hypochondriac.
In retrospect I can see that my dry eyes and dental problems and palpitations and migraines and joint pain and insomnia etc etc etc were all menopause related.
I don’t know why the GPs don’t automatically make that their first question for 40+ year old women.
In my case HRT hasn’t had much of an effect,even after a couple of years of different combinations and doses. Lots of women on Mumsnet have really fast and positive outcomes from HRT and it got my hopes up. Not trying to be negative, just offering a different perspective.

@Helenahandkart I appreciate different perspectives. It proves that we are all different and unique.
It's so easy to write women off as being neurotic or hypochondriacal. I had no idea that was my label until I downloaded the NHS app and saw it on my records!

As I said I'm not sure HRT is the route for me with having familial breast cancer. I'll discuss it with my GP hopefully soon and go from there.

Do you still use HRT?

Yes, and I have a follow up tomorrow morning to hopefully tweak it a bit more. Maybe I’d be a lot worse without it, but it certainly hasn’t been a miracle cure so far.

I hope it works out for you @Helenahandkart and you find the right dose. Thank you for your replies.

Hello! Your post really resonated with me. I am 41 and have been having similar symptoms for the last 3 years. Drs only offering was to do blood tests and tell me that my hormones were in "normal" range - normal for who? And offer antidepressants. The insomnia and anxiety and night sweats became so debilitating that I booked a private appointment with a menopause specialist who wrote to my GP requesting prescription for Utrogestan (micronised bio identical progesterone) and Oestrogel
With 2 days of taking the Utrogestan I was able to sleep again and feeling calmer. I read that progesterone takes a huge nose dive around late 30s/early 40s so that makes sense to me. I like the Oestrogel as you can taper the amount. So far I've found I only really need half a pump - I think it was the lack of progesterone causing most of my symptoms. I hope you get sorted it's shocking how ill informed GPs are when this affects half of the population !

@thecrispfiend I'm so glad your symptoms settled. I had a phone consultation this afternoon with a GP. She's pretty convinced I'm peri so will be prescribing hrt patches once I've had my blood pressure checked tomorrow.

I'm pretty anxious moving forward but I cant carry on like this. I'm tired and tearful. I've done alot of reading today as I was worried about the familial breast cancer risk but it seems alot if this research has been discounted recently.

It is shocking how ill informed GPs are. I was dreading having a call with an unsympathetic male doctor who didn't have a clue.

Ahh I'm so glad your GP listened I hope it helps it may take some tweaking and not every type suits everyone so don't be afraid to ask for a different one if it Susie you good luck xx

I could have wrote your post. So many niggly symptoms, aches and twinges then it's sets off health anxiety I've never had.
Feel like I'm giving in by thinking of hrt, which I know is irrational. I'm confused what supplements help too.

@cocktailanddreams I've done so much reading about hrt over the last few days. I still have so many questions and like you I have health anxiety so there's always this need for reassurance. The site I've found useful is Balance-menopause (Dr Louise Newson).
I'm still waiting for my GP to get back to me. She sent me a message yesterday evening to say she's reached out to tge gynae team as she's not sure if it's contraindicated for familial breast cancer.

You are absolutely not giving in if you decide to use HRT. I've realised that menopause can't be stopped but there's no need to suffer if there's help available x