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Menopause

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Peri-meno - did you lose ability to cry?

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Wondersense · 10/09/2023 21:49

In January 2021, when I was in my mid 30s, about 2 weeks after my last covid jab, I started getting odd symptoms. Within about 2 - 3 months I had severe sexual dysfunction. I also totally lost my ability to cry and my emotions are blunted, including the joyful ones. I had other symptoms too but it's too long a list to go through all of them.

Fast forward to now and I've been on testosterone only HRT since about January. I feel more normal now than I did when I was off it and my sexual function is largely restored, however my emotions are still the same :( I used to be the kind of person who felt moved to tears watching films or listening to pieces of music....but now I almost have nothing. I also don't laugh as much or find things as funny or joyful like I used to, and I miss my emotions as they used to be. It's not just an emotion related thing though - I chopped a lot of onions a few months ago and before I would have been crying a lot and now? Nothing. Just stinging eyes.

I'm convinced this is estrogen related because the only time this happened to me before was when I was on the pill for 2 years to treat painful periods. I think think it artificially lowered or altered my hormone profile, and when I came off of it, I saw a linear improvement. About 8 months to a year later it was totally resolved, including the terrible sexual dysfunction I had developed because of being on it.

Has anyone else experienced this? I feel a bit alone because instead of being more emotional like a lot of women in peri, I seem to be going in the opposite direction. I very much miss the enriching experience of life I used to have. I'm seeing my gynaecologist on Tuesday and I hope she takes me seriously and that I'll get to trial some estrogen. Just don't want to continue feeling 'meh' like this all my life as I feel I've lost a treasured part of my personality and zest.

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