Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Menopause

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

The rage. The crying. The fog.

22 replies

JuneOsborne · 13/07/2023 22:23

I'm 43. Peri and meno is EVERYWHERE.

But, I'm thinking to myself, I'm too young, life is stressful, it's normal. You just think it's you because it's, trendy.

You'll be OK when this deadline is met/schools out/we get over x. You know how it goes.

But, I think I have to be honest.

The rage. Omg. It's like truth serum combined with 'get out of my way'. You're all idiots. For crying out loud. Like, <this> not like <that>

The crying. Did you know there are no sponges in the seafloor in Greece any more? Well I didn't. And when I found out? I sobbed.

The brain fog. Pass me that thing. You know that thing. That bloody thing. It pours. I need it to make the Stock... Cue the rage. THAT FUCKING THING. IT HAS A HANDLE. IT POURS. STOCK

The jug. The fucking bastarding jug. That what I need. A jug.

Add in periods that have become significantly heavier and clottier.

It's gotta be, right? Is it time to make the appointment? Or am I just a cow that can't remember simple words and is weirdly emotional about the state of the seafloor?

Oh. For added interest. I'm cold. So cold. Unless it's 30c, I'm cold. Like, I wear socks in bed, cold. I do get hot, but not that classic hot flush thing. Almost the total. Opposite.

And obviously. I'm tired. So. Tired.

OP posts:
SweetAsIcedChocolate · 13/07/2023 22:32

Hypothyroidism is a possibility. Everything up to the point you said ‘so cold’ screamed peri but, when you add cold, I’d say thyroid issue is definitely possible.

Patchworksack · 13/07/2023 22:33

Do you know when your mum went through menopause? Take 10 years off that number. Then talk to GP about whether a trial of HRT is right for you.

SeasonsBleatings · 13/07/2023 22:38

I was 44 when I experienced many of the same symptoms. HRT has been transformational for me.

DaisyThistle · 13/07/2023 22:39

All of your symptoms including being cold. I too thought it was hypothyroidism. It was peri-meno. I'm post meno now and don;t get cold all the time. It's a lesser known but real symtpom.

But the bastard thing with a handle. THAT THING! pass it to me. That, I'm afraid stays around forever. I am so sick of trying to have a conversation and being unable to remember most of the nouns in every sentence.

Stillfatstillmiserable · 13/07/2023 22:43

Apart from the cold issue, you're describing me 10 years ago aged 44...
I threatened to stab colleagues for putting things away in the wrong place... and I work in a kichen! with VERY LARGE, VERY SHARP knives😱
In the end my boss called me into his office to explain I was upsetting and scaring people, but in my mind they were all idiots and I was the sane one🤣🤣
I didn't go for HRT in the end but if you do I've heard it's best to start it ASAP, ideally while you're still in peri- menopause

Original poster
JuneOsborne · 14/07/2023 01:29

Thanks all.

I had a vitamin d deficiency two years ago. I have been treated and better on that front (with daily vit D still). But at the time I had everything checked. Thyroid was normal. I was cold then too.

I'd say (she's not here to ask) that my mum was early fifties. She never had HRT. She used to say to me, vits called the change for a reason. You're never the same again' so not terribly helpful on that front really. I do know that she suffered. As a teenager, I remember thinking she'd lost her sense of humor. And her sense of fun. And joy.

Man. I don't want that.

OP posts:
Squirrelsnut · 14/07/2023 05:15

HRT has been brilliant for me. My main symptoms were brutal anxiety and insomnia. Thought I was going crackers.

lampformyfeet · 14/07/2023 05:21

HRT helped me massively with the insomnia and anxiety too. When I slept better my irritability stopped.
If you feel cold all the time definitely look at having your thyroid checked.

lampformyfeet · 14/07/2023 05:35

Although you’ve had your thyroid checked it was 2 years ago- a lot can change in that time.

everyonesacf · 14/07/2023 05:53

I'm 48 and I've been on HRT for 6 weeks. I wish I had of started sooner! The rage is 90% gone, the brain fog has improved and I feel so much calmer. I think I may have started getting symptoms 4 years ago and just didn't realise. I always thought I would deal with it naturally but after researching, the benefits of HRT far outweigh the negatives.

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 14/07/2023 05:55

Make the appointment. I'm 44 and just started HRT, and oh my god, the difference! I'm ME again!

I hadn't realised quite how awful I'd been feeling and for how long until I wasn't anymore.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 14/07/2023 06:07

The rage. Omg. It's like truth serum combined with 'get out of my way'. You're all idiots. For crying out loud. Like, <this> not like <that>

I have to say that I am kind of enjoying my new found ability to just tell it as it is and a new found ability to just not care what others think and to stop pleasing people.

izzy2076 · 14/07/2023 06:08

I love your description of it being a truth serum!!! That is so true! My filter has gone and as an ex people pleaser I think that bit can be a gift.

Barbie222 · 14/07/2023 06:10

I felt like that for 4 years and was fobbed off through covid. Now I'm on hrt and am a different person. We are set up to need hormones!

Original poster
JuneOsborne · 14/07/2023 07:57

Right. You've galvanised me. I'm going to make an appointment.

I thought I was too young/it isn't bad enough/it's just being a woman in her forties who is tired of working/a busy parent/needs a holiday.

OP posts:
Squirrelsnut · 14/07/2023 13:45

Can I tell people about the pre- payment certificate for HRT? Much, much cheaper option, especially if you are prescribed a 'two phase' treatment which is a 'double charge' prescription..🙄

SirChenjins · 14/07/2023 13:49

YY to all that - with the final indignity of not being able to take HRT. The only chink of sunlight is that finally - at 54 - I haven’t had period for 4 months so maybe, finally, that’s the end of them 🤞

Original poster
JuneOsborne · 14/07/2023 15:09

SirChenjins · 14/07/2023 13:49

YY to all that - with the final indignity of not being able to take HRT. The only chink of sunlight is that finally - at 54 - I haven’t had period for 4 months so maybe, finally, that’s the end of them 🤞

How come you can't take HRT? If you don't mind me asking?

I have migraines and I'm worried it'll be a no for me too. How did you cope without the HRT?

With everything you read about the transformative effect of HRT, it must be tough to not be able to have it.

OP posts:
Original poster
JuneOsborne · 14/07/2023 15:10

Squirrelsnut · 14/07/2023 13:45

Can I tell people about the pre- payment certificate for HRT? Much, much cheaper option, especially if you are prescribed a 'two phase' treatment which is a 'double charge' prescription..🙄

I've never heard of this. Is it different to a regular pre payment cert?

OP posts:
everycowandagain · 14/07/2023 15:22

I had all the same symptoms as you at the same age, started HRT at 44. Life changing!

I hadn't connected the dots at the time because of my age but the previous couple of years I had raging meno symptoms. Am fully menopausal now and feeling so much better on HRT. I feel like myself again.

SpicedPumpkinLatte · 17/07/2023 20:38

OMG I could have written your post OP. Am 41 with similar symptoms. The fucking rage is real.

Did you get an appointment?

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread