My sleep cycle is got to pot!

[LookItsMeAgain]

I'm late 40's and clearly (at least to me) I'm peri menopause. Still having regular enough periods.
I get migraines so when I was younger I tried the mini pill because the others at the time all had side effects of which one was migraine. That's just a bit of background.

At the moment, whenever I try to sleep with earplugs in they make my ear canals terribly itchy.

The thing is, I'm really struggling with my sleep. My husband snores (like a chainsaw) and so do I, when I eventually do get to sleep.

I've been keeping an eye on it with my Fitbit and it said that I got 3hrs 52 last night. The night before it registered only 1hr 11 and Fri into Sat was 4hrs 35.

I have no energy to do anything.

Any suggestions?

Magnesium and separate rooms.

Magnesium really helps if your can get one that doesn't upset your stomach (magnesium glycerinate is the best iirc).

I am a year older and have fairly mild symptoms so far but this is definitely my main one. I've just started hrt and also started weight training and have seen an improvement.

Snoring husband may need to sleep elsewhere. I have trained mine so if I give him a shove he rolls to his side and stops but my parents moved into separate rooms at this stage because of my dads. Your sleep has to be your priority at the moment as it is so important and yet so elusive.

Also if you can, try and flex your mornings. I know that for many many people this isn't possible but don't be afraid to if you can. For example I only accept really urgent meetings before 9.30 so I know if I do have a bad night (like last night actually) I don't have to rush. Again, appreciate this isn't an option for everyone but use it where it is.

And stop drinking.
And have a regular, chilled bedtime routine.

I've cut right back on my drinking - it genuinely could be weeks between alcoholic drinks now. I used to be able to drink a bottle or two over a weekend but now I'd be lucky to finish a bottle in a month!

I listen to calming sounds on the Calm app before going to sleep. Sometimes I listen to a sleep story. My morning routine is fairly fixed though. I don't have a spare room that DH or I could move to. I am looking in to getting our attic converted but that's going to take a lot of money and time.

Thanks for the suggestion about magnesium. I had been taking it sporadically as it was suggested to me for restless legs and I would only take it when I felt like I needed to for that purpose. I might take it more regularly if it might help with the sleeping too.

Just to clarify - that I'm talking about a bottle or two of wine and not spirits or any other alcoholic drink.

I'm genuinely the closest I've been to drinking as when I was pregnant (never drank through either pregnancy).

Could you start sleeping earlier? And/or nap during the day?

Have you both done anything about your snoring ?

I'm just about to start HRT for my sleep. Am really hoping that it helps!

I do go to bed earlier than my husband. If I get to sleep first, strangely enough my snoring isn't on the same decibel level as his is so he is able to get to sleep without issue. If it were the other way around, I think I'd be a zombie by now.

I work 8-4:30 so I can't really nap during the day either. My husband on the other hand sings the virtues of a 'power nap'!

Thanks for the suggestion though. I'm taking them all on board.

No. But I definitely will have to see my GP about my sleep issue if it doesn't improve and I'll mention it at that appointment.

I did't find magnesium helped me at all. 2 slightly odd things me helped a lot

1. Mouth taping - when I breathe through my mouth I snore and get zero rem sleep. Taping increased my rem by 1 hour
2. Eating kiwis - these really increased my deep sleep and rem and there is some evidence to support this.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21669584/