Your man & the menopause

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Does/did your male partner show any interest in the menopause?

Whether you're going through it, approaching it, or been through it?

A bit like periods.. I'm quite amazed how little my DH wants to know. He's sympathetic but clearly not interested in any of the details and not engaged.

It astounds me as, if my partner was going through such a massive life change, I'd want to know all about it so I could support them. Or at least when they talked about it, I would show interest and ask questions.

Is it just my DH who is so disinterested?
Is this just a societal/patriarchal thing.. where society chooses to ignore a massive change half the population go through?!

My hubby isn't really interested but then I've been through it in the last 5 or so years with no symptoms other than the odd hit flush so we're both very lucky. There was a segment on bbc rolling news a while back about it and he did ask me then, in a slightly ckk on nfused and concerned tone had it happened to me. I just said yep 👍

Dp isn’t really interested, which doesn’t bother me particularly.

My husbands been really good with it all.
It started early for me at about 38. I did 18 months thinking I was depressed before the hot flushes started.
I had awful insomnia and some really nasty symptoms. My husband did all the household chores and sorted the kids out whilst I barely survived.
When I finally did get a diagnosis he pushed me to go private to get help and listened to some podcasts and bits on his commute so that he could understand it a bit more. We have two daughters who have learnt a lot about it through me and our son who is 8 has heard bits and pieces about it too.

my dp actively listened about the doctors phone call and what I’ve been prescribed and how often I use them. When I talk about gel vs patches he actually asks questions etc which is nice.

Mine’s really supportive which initially surprised me but he has two teenaged daughters and three younger sisters so he’s fairly in tune with women. I had a really rough time with the brain fog, memory loss and anxiety at first, to the point where I had to leave my job due to an unsupportive female boss in a small company. He never failed to give support and advice when I needed it and encouraged me to be a menopause champion at my current place of work. As a result my confidence has soared.

He's not interested but then there hasn't been any massive change for me. It's a non-event so far.

He's not particularly interested but I reckon he needs to know as it concerns my health, so I tell him all about it. To be fair, he is very supportive and he does his best to listen and understand.

My DH responds the same way as he does anything... that is, listens if I choose to talk, is supportive of anything I need to do and will actively help out, doesn't blame or complain if negative effects impact us/him and tries to help and takes it on board if I need the help to be a certain way.
Is he wanting to talk or ask questions.. no because he never does about anything much really.
So he cares, responds positively and helps me through, but if I want to talk I need to use my friends (except in rare instances).

I think that's ok, as it's just the way he is and I knew that when I married him, talking through life's issues isn't a strength of his, but he tolerates my weaknesses too and he has many other good qualities that more than make up for it.

No, thank goodness because I couldn't stand that!

He'll happily listen to me moaning (mainly about insomnia which is pretty much the only thing that bothers me now & the cost/availability of HRT when I need a new 'script) but wouldn't dream of asking questions about menopause or any other aspect of my health unless I raised the subject or was clearly on death's door. I didn't discuss my symptoms or decision to start HRT with him (or anyone else!), it honestly didn't occur to me.

He's not sympathetic at all! I think it's because I'm having mostly non visual symptoms that I feel and he can't physically see. Headache, erratic periods which have disappeared now , foggy head, digestive upset, insomnia, high blood pressure, mood swings. No hot flashes amazingly . He'd take notice if I was sweltering in bed next to him lol

He took notice when I had a migraine and puked everywhere 😉

Generally he'd say 'you're always ill'
... I'm on HRT now and feeling a lot better 😊

My man and the menopause…..

he’s lucky he’s not under the patio.

That about sums it up

😂😂😂yes THIS! I empathise!

My late dp was brilliant, he was actually there when I got my menopause, as I had a total hysterectomy, he helped me through the hot flushes, the brain fog, the mood swings & when I started HRT me demanding sex at all hours of the day & night. Considering he was only 30, he was very clued up & knew how best to help me.